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lleksam
28-01-12, 18:35
Hey,

Recently I've been constantly thinking about the person I used to be before all this started. I feel my personality has changed but I really can't be sure if that is true or not.

Does anyone else ever feel like this? Constantly looking back at their life and thinking it was so much better before?

Could this be symptom of depression or just general disappear to my current situation?

pinkdove
28-01-12, 18:37
Hi Don't know what it is but i am always thinking of the person i was before, and wishing i could get there again.

Although i suffer anxiety and depression, i am a lot better, but would love to be me before it all started x

lleksam
28-01-12, 18:43
I don't have any real anxiety thanks to meds but I still find it hard to relax or sit still.

I used to really enjoy doing nothing :P I used to be out going and love to socialise but now I reel from the thought..

I keep thinking about before this all started and hope I was always hopeful and look forward to things, now it seems nothing raises my spirits :(

Deb51967
28-01-12, 18:45
I used to have so much confidence...... The only place I go to now on my own is work.....

God, I used to be a Secretary in Hong Kong!! Where have I disappeared to?

pinkdove
28-01-12, 18:48
I don't have any real anxiety thanks to meds but I still find it hard to relax or sit still.

I used to really enjoy doing nothing :P I used to be out going and love to socialise but now I reel from the thought..

I keep thinking about before this all started and hope I was always hopeful and look forward to things, now it seems nothing raises my spirits :(
Yes i find it hard to relax, have the telly on in the background, with laptop going, i used to be able to just sit and watch telly, but now i have to have something to occupy me.

we will get there in the end i'm sure :)

Stormsky
28-01-12, 20:12
We used to live a life witout real thought, no thought of what you said really,or did, just did it , like everyone out there thats not suffered... once suffering an illness like anxiety, i do think that you think about what you say to others, i think you become a kinder person....your brain is one big computer, and has randomly been running on its own... now we have taken control of the keyboard,and we decide what we think, we are aware of what we choose to think now, we know not to berate ourselves, we know we shoud be thinking positive thoughts ... i dont think you are that aware of it all before being enlightened by anxiety...
So for me, there are certain things that i think anx have taught me, and i do feel more enlightened and more thoughtful to others... i am aware of the things i say to others now, and am never hurtful with words...
on the flip side, yes i miss being carefree, the confidence i had , the fun i had!!!

theharvestmouse
28-01-12, 22:17
Good thread this,

I talked to my therapist about the 'old me', and she would say, you are still that person, you have not become a different person.

But I always think of myself pre anxiety problems, as the 'normal' me, the person who just did things without spending hours thinking about it before hand. Who was capable of doing anything, who was confident, who enjoyed socialising, who was happy most of the time, who looked to the future with great excitement.

I've slowly come to realise that I am still that same person, and I would have changed even without the anxiety, but I have had my problems and I am learning from them and in the end it may even make me a better and stronger person.

Hope that others realise that they are still the same person they were, but sometimes they just need to think about that and not forget how much they have achieved in life.

morning_blues
28-01-12, 22:24
Hiya - this is interesting. At my session with the counsellor last week she made me do a list - on one side, the me I used to be, and on the other the me I am now. I haven't changed in the person I am, but the way I react to things has fallen out of kilter and affecting my ability to be the me I want to be. So now we're working on ways to get back to the me I want to be by making behaviour changes - I don't want to change who I am but need to figure out how to cope with things better by being more flexible and more assertive so that I don't freak out whenever things feel out of my control. Sorry am rambling but hope that makes some kind of sense?!

Pipkin
29-01-12, 00:36
Hi. Very interesting to see different peoples' take on this. I've suffered from anxiety since my early teens and I don't believe I used to be a different person, or if I did, I can't remember. I just catch a glimpse of how I could have been from seeing my sister dealing with things so sensibly and logically. However, I don't believe in 'what ifs' and we have to deal with how we are and recognise the positives as Stormsky has pointed out.