boa_bird
03-02-12, 00:05
Hi All,
I have landed here rather than searching through websites that will basically tell me I am doomed, I wanted to speak with real people, with real emotions, feelings and experiences.
I arranged to have a smear test because I was having a few problems, and thought it was better safe than sorry, however when I arrived at the docs, the nurse looked through my smear results and said that I had an abnormal smear in 2004 but hadn't had 1 since, my jaw literally dropped because I was unaware that it had come back abnormal, and because the time that had past since that smear test. I can tell you all because you don't know me, if you did I would not be so open, it's easier to talk to people I don't know then to burden my loved ones, I have been in and out of refuge since 2004 because my ex kept finding us, so everytime we settled somewhere, we had to leave, up until two years ago when I discovered that my dads gf was telling him where we was, once that happened I cut off all contact with my dad and his gf, and we have been safe, so obviously I didn't recieve the letter because I was no longer at that address in 2004, keeping my kids safe was my main concern, so for the past 8 years smears were not a high priority for me, even when I met a new partner and bled after sex, It did not occur to me that there was anything wrong, last year my symptoms worsened, I now bleed for months at a time but the docs said it was due to a hormonal problem, I couldn't take the pill because I had a dvt in 2009 so they suggested the 3 year implant, that was put in september, I have bled nearly everyday since, sometimes loads and sometimes only after wiping myself would I notice, but still I never badgered the docs about it. Last week I decided to get a smear done just to be sure because I knew it had been a while since my last one, so today I was completely unprepared for the nurse asking me why I hadn't been since my last abnormal smear, I think she said, the abnormality was due to thickening, which I don't understand, she said I would have to wait upto 3 weeks for the results and that the actual test would probably bring on a heavy bleed, which it has and I have some period type pains now as well.
Sorry for the rant but I told her that I had moved around a lot but always signed up at a new docs within a week of the move, so why had I not been notified by now? Her explanation was that smear records were kept on a different screen, so unless my doc was looking for results they would not find them, that if I was due for a smear it would be sent like an auto notification, so unfortunately it was overlooked! I am furious with myself for not sorting this out sooner and I am livid with the various doctors etc who did not look for the info, despite being presented with all the symptoms, mostly I am upset at the thought of telling my kids. I am clear of all sti's because I have not had a partner since my last test which was nearly 3 years ago, I didn't want one, just wanted to concentrate on myself and the kids, a man hasn't even entered my thoughts, 2 abusive relationships was enough to put me off. So now I gotta admit, i'm pretty scared, that after everything we have been through my kids are gonna grow up without me, their rock, their mum.
Jaime x
I have landed here rather than searching through websites that will basically tell me I am doomed, I wanted to speak with real people, with real emotions, feelings and experiences.
I arranged to have a smear test because I was having a few problems, and thought it was better safe than sorry, however when I arrived at the docs, the nurse looked through my smear results and said that I had an abnormal smear in 2004 but hadn't had 1 since, my jaw literally dropped because I was unaware that it had come back abnormal, and because the time that had past since that smear test. I can tell you all because you don't know me, if you did I would not be so open, it's easier to talk to people I don't know then to burden my loved ones, I have been in and out of refuge since 2004 because my ex kept finding us, so everytime we settled somewhere, we had to leave, up until two years ago when I discovered that my dads gf was telling him where we was, once that happened I cut off all contact with my dad and his gf, and we have been safe, so obviously I didn't recieve the letter because I was no longer at that address in 2004, keeping my kids safe was my main concern, so for the past 8 years smears were not a high priority for me, even when I met a new partner and bled after sex, It did not occur to me that there was anything wrong, last year my symptoms worsened, I now bleed for months at a time but the docs said it was due to a hormonal problem, I couldn't take the pill because I had a dvt in 2009 so they suggested the 3 year implant, that was put in september, I have bled nearly everyday since, sometimes loads and sometimes only after wiping myself would I notice, but still I never badgered the docs about it. Last week I decided to get a smear done just to be sure because I knew it had been a while since my last one, so today I was completely unprepared for the nurse asking me why I hadn't been since my last abnormal smear, I think she said, the abnormality was due to thickening, which I don't understand, she said I would have to wait upto 3 weeks for the results and that the actual test would probably bring on a heavy bleed, which it has and I have some period type pains now as well.
Sorry for the rant but I told her that I had moved around a lot but always signed up at a new docs within a week of the move, so why had I not been notified by now? Her explanation was that smear records were kept on a different screen, so unless my doc was looking for results they would not find them, that if I was due for a smear it would be sent like an auto notification, so unfortunately it was overlooked! I am furious with myself for not sorting this out sooner and I am livid with the various doctors etc who did not look for the info, despite being presented with all the symptoms, mostly I am upset at the thought of telling my kids. I am clear of all sti's because I have not had a partner since my last test which was nearly 3 years ago, I didn't want one, just wanted to concentrate on myself and the kids, a man hasn't even entered my thoughts, 2 abusive relationships was enough to put me off. So now I gotta admit, i'm pretty scared, that after everything we have been through my kids are gonna grow up without me, their rock, their mum.
Jaime x