What are we most afraid of?

[MaryMac]

Been thinking about my HA tonight. I don't drink, never have, I don't like flying or rollercoasters, and it's because I'm a total control freak. It's like our bodies and health are the only things we really don't have that much control over to a certain extent. I just wonder what it is that scares me most when I think about getting ill? I'm so used to feeling well and healthy that when something goes amiss, or I THINK it does, the panic starts. It's because it's beyond my control. Then I get visions of being very ill, lying in a hospital bed getting all sorts of tubes and treatments that would make me feel worse, then the ultimate thing we can't control: death. I've never considered myself afraid of death until the last few months when my HA has been overwhelming. I still don't think I'm afraid of death itself, I'm afraid of the few moments beforehand, what is it going to feel like? Will I be panicking and screaming and crying?
Just wondering what it is that we are all ultimately afraid of. I think for me it's the lack of control and how horrible any sort of illness would make me feel.
x

[SomeOddworld]

"I'm not afraid of death, I'm afraid of dying"
-Christopher Hitchens

I'm more afraid of the process of dying than death itself.

[Pipkin]

Mary,

A very good question. I suppose in my case I would have to say that I'm most afraid of the anxiety itself. That's what causes me to become most anxious. As you mentioned, a lot of it is about control and when something becomes unpredictable and when i cant do anything about it, it really scares me.

Pip

[chl_hobbs]

I think with me, because ive 'been there' ie:told it was very likely i wouldnt make it because id lost so much blood, it's knowing how alone you feel at that point. you can have loads of people around you (as i did) but you panic 'within yourself' if you know what i mean, like youre on the outside looking in. It's not nice. I know i should be feeling on top of the world because i AM alive, but i live in fear everyday.

charlotte x

[sickandtired]

im afraid of dying and leaving my kids unprotected.....
im afraid of something terrible happening to my kids and i hadnt done enough to protect them
im afraid of my mum dying and losing my best friend (my mum)

[Stormsky]

its all the 'fear' that keep anxiety alive!
if we fear anxiety... then we are keeping it alive in us... if we didnt fear it, we wouldnt have it!

[MaryMac]

Yeah I think the anxiety just makes everything seem so much worse. If we could get a symptom without being anxious about it, we'd be so much better! Really wish I was one of those people who is carefree and sails through life with no such thoughts/issues.

[sebinkent]

Anxiety is an extension of fear - without fear there would be no anxiety but without fear we would be putting ourselves in danger everyday, so it's a very important emotion. For a lot of HA sufferers, including myself, a big part of the problem is being out of control. I also hate flying and going on roller coasters for the same reasons. I recently convinced myself that I had some horrible disease because I lost my appetite, I started to look ill, had breathing issues and many of the other symptoms of severe anxiety. I was always questioning whether I had an illness or whether it was all in my mind and the uncertainty compounded the lack of control which made the anxiety worse and the cycle continued. I agree with a lot of the posts in this thread - nobody will ever know what happens to us when we die, perhaps that is also a fear of the unknown? But mainly the fear comes from the process of dying.
Here's hoping that one day there will be a cure for every illness and disease.

[Stormsky]

If you continuously tell yourself your ill, you will become ill, and feel symptons of those illnesses.... mind and body are linked as you know.... trying telling yourself you are fit , healthy, never been better, and see how that makes you feel! got to be worth trying....
spending your life fearing dying, means forgetting to actually live life !!!