I am driving myself crazy, 3 types of cancer in 1 week!

[mum4]

I am hopeing someone can relate to this, because atm I feel mad :weep:

So it all started last saturday, I found a bruise on my hand that I didn't remember doing. I couldnt stop thinking about the bruise, I tried to forget about it, I mean its a bruise for goodness sakes right?! So just to put my mind at ease I decided to google unexplained bruising, my word I wish I hadnt!

So that was it, I was convinced I had leukaemia, it all made sense why I felt so tired surely. So monday morning my husband booked me a docs appointment, I think tbh the poor soul has had enough of me worrying about everything all the time. The doc looked at me like I was crazy, but as I explained how Ive been feeling she seemed to sympathise a little, this is when I finally came clean about my anxiety.

The problem is since then, and literally 2 days later, I found what I thought was a new mole, it could of been there for ages tbh, but im sure some of you know what its like, once you think something wasn't there before its all you can think about. dr google identified I probably have skin cancer :weep:So thursday I was at the docs again! The docter looked at my mole and didnt seem at all concerned, but I just cant believe her, it doesnt look right to me, I dont rememeber the mole being there before, and I seriously cant stop thinking it over and over.

To top it off I have feel rather lightheaded for the past few weeks, so I ended up googling feeling dizzy/faint/giddy, you get the idea :weep:

I am going mad with worry here, I have no appetite, Im amazed Im sleeping tbh, but worst of all I keep thinking Im not going to be around much longer and its really getting me down, I cant function properly Im so scared

Please someone say Im not alone

C

[jaynehal]

I'm exactly the same and google everything then usually end up in tears and rushing to the doctors, I have bad health anxiety and have done for 10 years, I can really sympathise with you, it's awful you really do believe you have a serious illness! Hope you improve soon
Jayne x

[kirst xxx]

I'm so sorry too hear you are going through this but u r def not alone! My health anxiety started last march, I had a strange pain in my leg went to the docs who said it was nothink but it was still there so I did the classic google check and guess what... I had cancer so I went and saw 4 dif docs at my surgery who all said it was nothing, eventually the last dr did me an xray and it was clear! So that was done with, then a week later I was getting hot flashes, weight loss, tiredness the lot I went back to the docs who gave me blood tests all clear so I was put on sertraline! They worked ok but like you I started getting bruises and again looked on google and it was cancer!!! Too cut it short its been nearly a year and in that time I started getting my life back and came off my meds on my own... I wish I hadn't I then began googling again and making symptoms worse by poking and prodding all the time! I recently went back to the docs who put me back on sertraline a higher dose and I seem to be picking up! I've now accepted if I'm going to die from anythink nasty at least I won't be worrying for the rest of my life! Atm I've become obsessed with my weight... Two years ago if someone said I lost weight I would of been over the moon now if someone says it I cry! I hate feeling like this and believe it is rubbing off on my little boy its horrible! Xxx

[mum4]

Thankyou for the replies, so sorry to hear I'm not alone, yet glad t the same time.
Dr google has alot to answer for :mad:

I really don't want to have to be put on meds, but at this rate I'm running out of options. I've been referred for cognitive therapy, but could be waiting upto 8 weeks for an appointment, I have no idea how I'm meant to cope alone for that long!

I have convinced myself I have a serious illness, and that I am going to be diagnosed with cancer, which leaves me thinking awful morbid things, how will my boys cope without mummy being around :weep:

[kingkong]

Hi,
I can assure you that you are not alone. I do googling always for every minor symptom and end up worrying. My life moves from one set of anxieties to another. I not only do it for myself, but my son as well.
My health anxiety started when I was hospitalised for the first time in my life in November 2011 due to gall bladder issues. 5 days in the hospital made me go crazy. I was a pessimist even before, but after the admission, I am constantly worrying. I am also extremely superstitious and believe in astrology, and constantly refer to my chart of how I am going to be.
If you stop with google, you are OK to some extent.
Sometimes I google out the surgical procedures on youtube and break my head.
What can I say? All I can say is, I can understand how you feel.

[jaynehal]

I visit my doctors 3 times a week with life threatening conditions that I convince myself that I've got an I'm going to die, stupid I know but that's what googling does to me, instead of googling now I'll come on here which isn't as bad, also my doctor is good an tells me well your still here this week and no worse, I suppose she is right, hope you feel better soon :) x

[miss sparkle]

completely sympathise and can relate to how you feel 100%. i have been having dizzy spells since December,and have convinced myself that i have a brain tumor.
it is taking over my life slowly but surely, but i honestly don't know what else to think about, as i can't remember my mind not being taken over by worrying x

[kirst xxx]

I also was completely against going on meds but they have worked for me and just shows they do work because as soon as I come off them I went back to square one!