View Full Version : Should I Stop & How (after 4 weeks at 15mg)
Hi All
To cut a long story short, 10 weeks ago I went back on meds after being off them for just under a year.
On the whole, I've felt worse for most of that 10 weeks. I started back on paroxetine (and had only 10 good days), and at the 6 week mark, after feeling utterly desperate and at a low I've never experienced before, my GP prescribed me mirtazepine, which I have now been on at 15mg a day for 30 days (as well as reducing the paroxetine, now on 5mg).
I feel so much worse than I ever did before I went back on meds, I thought I was doing the right thing as I felt my anx/depression returning, but now I wish I could rewind 11 weeks to when I was at least "feeling". I generally have little to no emotions at the moment, which is bringing me down.
I don't know what I should do, up to 30mg and see what happens, or come off meds all together and see how I get on.
If I come off them now, does anyone know how soon I may have some emotions back? Has anyone got any experience of this (i.e. not going on another med, but coming off all together). I know that being on two meds may complicate things but I just want me back again, even if its the me that did have crying spells.
Since going back on meds I have experienced anxiety/panic, something I've never really had before.
When will it all end :(
Welcome to the (not so) wonderful world of Mirtazapine. My thoughts are with you, they really are.
Have you told your GP about all of this?
My experience of 30mg was hell. I felt numb to everything and my anxiety become intolerable. I wish that I had never even heard of this drug - I am going to be stopping as well with a bit of luck, I am going to try an SSRI again.
I'm sending hugs - stick in there, there WILL be a solution somewhere down the line.
cathycrumble
09-02-12, 16:44
I feel like you Lauz and I have been following your threads and know what you have been going through All we want is to be our old selves and it is hard. I do know in my 20s I had anxiety and I got through without meds with the help of the claire weeks books and my courage.
I have stopped the prozac 3 days ago I was on it for 32 days today I feel sick and a bit anxious keep talking to myself and giving myself positive thoughts well not easy at the moment I think I may be going through withdrawals. not sure.
Have you spoken to your GP for advice? And I am sure someond on here will also help.
I have got citalopram but I know I just cant start another my tummy is so off at the moment. good luck and I am thinking of you
Cathy xx
Thanks for replying Mono and Cathy - I last saw my GP on Monday when she signed me back to work on reduced hours. I felt ready to go back and had been generally more positive for a few days, but still more downs than ups but sitting at home alone all day for the last 10 weeks hasn't helped me either, so I thought going back to work and being around people with a distraction would help. There's no pressure at work at the moment so it's an easy 4 hours.
I don't know if going back to work, and the most recent reduction in paroxetine has led me to feel how I do now, I hope it's just a passing phase or "blip", but I'm too scared to increase the mirt or the paroxetine. I just want some kind of normality back.
nicola1980
09-02-12, 17:36
Normality?? Ive forgot what that feels like :-( x x
Hi Lauz, it sounds to me like it's time to talk to your gp for the right advice, you can't go on like this and work.
you have had a tough time of it i know that, but please get some proper advice, and if you want to ge meds free they will advise you the best way to reduce.
sending you :hugs: and hope you feel better soon xx
Me too Nicola, I may have been feeling down and crying a lot before the meds, but at least I could cry. But most importantly, I felt happy too. I thought I was heading for a downward spiral because the mind chatter had started, which for me, usually leads to depersonalisation and I didn't want to end up with that, but being back on meds brought on the depersonalisation for a while, AND a lot worse.
I'm scared that it's not reversible - that stopping the meds won't remove the side effects of extreme anxiety and panic (which I've never experienced before). My appetite is near zero except for the couple of hours after taking mirtazepine. The only time I get complete relief is when I'm asleep, which thankfully is better thanks to the mirt.
I don't know what to do for the best. Has anyone quit meds because of bad side effects like these, and how long was it before they went away/eased?
Thanks Pink, you're right. I may ring the surgery tomorrow.
Ive been off meds for 6 months... my hubby thinks im better than i was on meds...more alive basically, less of a zombie!! i felt id been sedated for 9yrs... i dont plan to go back on, so i battle along with the bad days.... dont get me wrong ive had 2 occasions where i neally started them again! (as i still got a load in my draw)- But ive come 6 months so plan to stay off them.... they never cured me, infact gave me other scary symptons that i never had before them !! and they only mask problem...
I appreciate some people find them life savers, and each to our own opinion...
Thanks Stormsky.
I just want to know that its all reversible - how I'm feeling now will go away without the meds.
Thanks Stormsky.
I just want to know that its all reversible - how I'm feeling now will go away without the meds.
Yes of course you will start feeling normal again without meds Lau, I promise.
These meds do more bad than good at times - I am in the thinking of giving them all up completely as well.
Stick in there - tell your GP everything. I've got an emergency appointment at mine tomorrow morning and am going to do the same.
Thanks Stormsky.
I just want to know that its all reversible - how I'm feeling now will go away without the meds.
then id say YES it will reverse once they are all out of your system...
im not saying you wont have anxiety still, but the numbness, lack of emotion is down mainly to meds... i think thats what they are supposed to do, take the edge off all your emotions...make you calm..sedate..... but they end up taking away all of your emotions!
Thanks both, that's reassuring. I've never had such a bad time on meds. They've always worked really well for me after the initial side effects but this time that hasn't been the case. I just wish I knew how long it will be before they're out of my system.
Thanks both, that's reassuring. I've never had such a bad time on meds. They've always worked really well for me after the initial side effects but this time that hasn't been the case. I just wish I knew how long it will be before they're out of my system.
Doctors tell you its only days before they are out of your system... i dont believe that... i was on amitryptline for 9yrs, and the doc said theyre out after a few days.... they may be, but the effects of them for 9yrs surely dont go in a few days!! they were running /altering my mind for 9yrs, that doesnt go away in a few days!
I know what you mean - I was on paroxetine for around 10 years reduced slowly and came of completely about a year ago, but then I felt my mind chatter coming back and thought would lead to the usual depersonalisation so asked to go back on it. Along with all the side effects, it brought on the depersonalisation after about 5 or 6 weeks and sent me plummeting into such a bad state of desperation that the doc and I decided to try mirtazepine. This gave me some relief straight away but now, having reduced the paroxetine over the last few weeks I'm starting to feel desperation creeping back. I don't want to go there again EVER, and I don't want to try a new medication cause quite frankly the side effects are unbearable.
Lauz Lea, I don't know if this will help but when I was on 30mg of Mirtazapine, I was getting obsessive thoughts (something I had never encountered before) so went down to 15mg on New Year's Day. Literally within days, the thoughts stopped.
Hi Lauz Lea - personally I would come off mirtazapine 15mg for 3 weeks and 30mg for 3 weeks - did nothing for depression - felt worse - as for helping anxiety had to take lorazepam?? Had morbid thoughts too - restartng Prozac now - worked well before - prefer SSRIs imo anyway. Good Luck Laura x
The meds gave me the depersonalisation/derealisation!!!
Silly question guys but what is 'depersonalisation'? What are symptoms?
ElizabethJane
09-02-12, 19:27
Dear Lauz I'm sorry that the mirtazapine has not worked out for you. I have withdrawn from it twice and gone back on it twice. I had very bad withdrawal symptoms which I won't go into detail here but if you go back you will find them. That is the thing I most fear is coming off them. I can do something about the weight gain. I'm beginning think it is the lithium that keeps me on an even keel. Keep us posted on what you decide to do. EJ
You guys are great an I really appreciate your replies.
Laura - how long have you been off mirt and how long before the emptyness went away? I know you're on fluoxetine but did it go fairly soon?
Mono - depersonalisation is pretty horrible, its the thing I hate the most. You generally feel disconnected from yourself and those around you and everything feels a bit 2D - like you're watching it all on the TV but not feeling or connecting with any of it. When I've suffered with this in the past I also don't recognise my own reflection in the mirror. I know its me, but its like I'm looking at a stranger.
Stormsky - what have you found helps you best since being off meds?
I take Jarrows B Right Vits... a high quality strength vit b complex...
drink lots water if you can too.... But the biggest thing you have to do, is POSITIVE thought statements...mine are automatic now, i dont have to try and come up with one...as soon as i get any sympton or negatives thoughts, i automatically have positive statements that just pop in... I distract myself by doing anything , cleaning, ironing...whatever it takes.... but to be honest although i have bad and good days, even the bad days are only say a couple of negative things in a day, i dont feel bad all day....but thats because the positive statements work.... i mean we've been telling ourselves we are ill, we are losing it, we wont ever be better, believing the scary stuff... and how does that make us feel?? yes rubbish, and we get panic.... so it stands to reason if i tell myself, i am happy, its just anx, theres nothing wrong with me, i am calm, i goiing to have a great day...then i get the feelings that those thoughts bring!!! simple, but hard i know!!!! even when your mind answers back and says 'yer right who you fooling' i just again ignore that and keep with the positives!!
Well, last night I decided to go back to 10mg of paroxetine (rightly or wrongly I don't know) and I felt myself again within a couple of hours and I feel a little better today.
Maybe I should take the paroxetine in the morning, I'm not sure. I've been reading some useful posts/threads on PaxilProgress (a website I usually avoid) and read that "reinstatement" of paroxetine, after being off it for some time, can take around 4 months and I've been back on it for 10 weeks now. It's just so hard to know what to do when you feel so low/numb.
nicola1980
10-02-12, 09:44
Glad your feeling a bit better, maybe its worth having a telephone consultation with your doc x x
cathycrumble
10-02-12, 11:36
hi girls I to have just had a phone consutation as I was so bad yesterday and woke this morning at 4 I to 2 2mg of diazipam then kept waking in a panic so I took a 10mg of cit. I got up about 10 and was shaking and retching so rang my gp and she rang back and has told me to take 20mg of cit as 10mg is not a thereputic dose and also I have taken 40mg of propranolol as she said the diazipam can be addictive and i have been on it a bit of a time.
I have promised my daughter I would go into town with her and really dont feel up to it.
Nicola how are you this morning?
I am so glad sue you are feeling a little better. Lets hope we start feeling normal.
My gp gave me a number so I rang and he gave me 3 organizations ie group theropy and phone help in my area so hopfully that will help me.
Cathy xx
Hi lauz so glad you are feeling a bit better today you must have done the right thing with the meds .
i know it is hard to know what to do for the best, but if taking the paroxatine has made you feel better, it's worth a try.
hope you have a better day xx
Hi Lauz - pleased to see you are feeling better. It might not be such a bad idea to stay on the Paroxetine until you are fully back in the work routine. Then when you are back on an even keel so to speak, you can decide what to do re meds. Take care.
Belle x
Hi Everyone, thanks for your continued support. Well, today was a better day, so maybe it was the reduction of paroxetine that made me feel so rotten. I got really stuck into things at work and was actually almost disappointed when it was time to go. I didn't have any anxiety today, just the morning jitters and an odd uncomfortable fear that I was going to jump infront of the train on the journey to and from work - NOT an urge, just a fear that I would, but I've had this before (without the meds) so I know it JUST A THOUGHT.
I may try taking the paroxetine in the morning instead of the evening, so may take 5mg tonight and 5mg tomorrow morning and take it from there.
I felt more connected today and for the majority of the time at work completely forgot how bad I've been feeling - long may it last.
nicola1980
10-02-12, 16:16
So pleased you've had a good day :D x x
---------- Post added at 16:16 ---------- Previous post was at 16:15 ----------
Are you still taking the mirt aswel? X x
sickandtired
10-02-12, 16:17
Im so glad you seem to have had a 'normal' day Lauz....how scary to keep swapping and changing your dose,only to feel worse.....
my doc suggested I up my dose of fluox to 40mg....but I said no thanks....dont want to rock the boat.Ive been for another pub lunch this week and Im out tomorrow night to a friends 40th....oh please let me enjoy myself and not sit in the corner getting slowly leathered.....
I want to have a laugh and maybe even dance (which I only really do if im drunk anyway) there,s loads of my old school friends going,im rather excited!!!
Hope you enjoy yourself sickandtired. Let us know how it went :)
Belle x
sickandtired
10-02-12, 16:23
thanks,will do.....
just a tiny worry about having a PA but Im not going to let it stop me going......if it happens,it happens....I,ll have to deal with it.
Hi Lauz - been off Mirt only 7 days but feel better despite starting Prozac! again. Mirt will not help with mind chatter - I tend to get this and it made it 100 times worse. Imo an SSRI is the best for this - Prozac worked for 15 years and had a bereavement in October, anxiety went through the roof - so agitated Dr put on Mirt - it did calm me down over Xmas but after that horrible! Made me flat - depression worse! Hope that helps and good luck - would go back on Paroxetine. ps I asked my dr about citalopram but he said no Prozac or sertraline - decided on the former! Hope you feel well soon. Laura x
Donna, you'll be fine. You've come so far over the last few months and I'm glad I've always had you there to offer support and listen, and I'm glad I've been able to do the same for you when you've needed it. You don't always have to have met someone to class them as a friend.
I've shared things with you I have only shared to a limited few people in my life and I want to share something else with you - YOU WILL go to the ball, YOU WILL have a great time, IF you have a PA, YOU WILL BE FINE.
Have a marvellous time x
---------- Post added at 19:12 ---------- Previous post was at 19:07 ----------
Are you still taking the mirt aswel? X x
Hi Nicola, yes still taking the mirt. I think a combo of reducing the paroxetine and going back to work cause my anxiety to increase, at least I hope that's what it was because today I felt better than I have in quite a while.
Well, after I went back up on the paroxetine I've been better. I only went back up to 10mg (but this is the dose I was on for about 7 years).
Had a fantastic family day out yesterday - survived an hour train journey each way and spent loads of money, something I haven't done for a long time and we'd saved some money especially for a nice day out (it wasn't any kind of "manic" episode lol).
I've been a little fuzzy round the edges today (for want of a better phrase), but the emotional numbness I had earlier this week has gone and have had only minor mind chatter.
On the whole, a great few days - long may it last this time.
nicola1980
12-02-12, 19:08
Yay thats great news :yahoo: xx
Well, still feeling a little fuzzy round the edges but nothing too unbearable and to be expected I suppose after going back up on te paroxetine.
Just had my telephone consultation for a referal to a "mental health practioner". It was only a 30min call to go over my history and my current situation and my face to face appointment should be within the next 3 weeks so we'll see what that brings.
Planning another day out for me and hubby tomorrow to go antique shopping, something we both enjoy, and after our shopping trip on Saturday I'm looking to it, although not the hour long train ride each way so will have to remember to take my book.
Our daughter is "taking us out" on Wednesday to the Sealife Centre - since she's only 7, it'll be more of a case that she'll be dragging is around whilst we pay for everything, but it will be a lovely day none the less and beats sitting around all week at home doing nothing.
So a nice couple of days to look forward to and keep me busy.
sickandtired
13-02-12, 15:09
sorry Lauz...only just saw your reply above! thank you so much for the encouragement..
yes,Im the same....only confide in one or two very close friends about certain subjects.....but to be honest.....only someone who's been through it fully understands,thats not to say they arent lovely friends (they have really been helpful and have their own different worries)......,I just feel so different to them
feel so lost some days
enjoy your day out.....xx
thats what i need to do....make plans
Thanks babe, we all have to stand at the foot of the hill sometimes, and looking up we never know how we're going to manage to get to the top, but we pack a lunch box, put on our walking boots and a warm coat, and set off. We'll see plenty of other hikers along the path, some going up, some going down, and some will give us a hand or walk with us for a while, but we won't get to the top unless we take the first steps at the bottom. Even when we feel like going back home cause it's warm and safe and all the walking is wearing us out, we know that nothing is as good as that feeling of standing at the top of the hill and taking in the clean air and beautiful views.
I should right a book of this stuff :)
sickandtired
13-02-12, 17:37
sure makes sense to me!
I love being in my home,heating on,fluffy slippers n fleecy dressing gown,cuddling my daughters,watching telly and not being disturbed by a single soul.....
my son doesnt want cuddles.... :( im only good for money and cash now,oh and taxi
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH! Why can't I just get stable!?
After my last post above, I had a rough patch so doctor upped the mirt to 30mg almost 2 weeks ago. I had 2 great days last Friday and Saturday but have been flat as a pancake since.
Initially I didn't have any major increase in side effects on upping, in fact I started to feel slowly better but now I'm feeling crap again. After a chat with my husband last night we decided that if the increased dose doesn't work, I'm not going to try another med, at least not right now anyway, I just can't take the side effects. I'd rather feel crap without the meds, than feel crap because of the meds. At least without the meds I could "feel".
So last night I reduced the paroxetine from 10mg to 5mg (I know many may think this is a big reduction, but I've been on it now for 4 months and my doctor wants me to come off it completely anyway.
I'm still taking 30mg of mirt cause I haven't given the theraputic dose long enough yet, I know I need to give it 3-6 weeks but if I don't notice any kind of improvement at the 3 week mark when next see my GP I'm going to discuss coming off all meds all together.
I'm just so fearful of everything - fearful of stopping, fearful of upping, fearful of trying something new, but I KNOW I didn't feel like this BEFORE the meds 4 months ago.
I can't turn back the clock and I don't have a crystal ball to tell me what the furture has in store so taking it the only way I can, one day at a time. I know the mirt has helped a little, but I just feel like my emotional circuit board has been disconnected.
Hi - know just how you feel - in the same boat - I found Mirtazapine rubbish tbh - good for sleep but not for my mood or anxiety - restarted Prozac - well never felt so ill in my life - in a big black hole - so stopped them last Saturday - about to start Sertraline tonight - in a panic about that - just so tired with it all - keep crying all the time - just taking each day at a time at the moment. Hope you start to feel a bit better - damned awful isn't it. Keep in touch Laura x
We're both going through the shit mill aren't we. If I had any idea that going back on meds would make me feel so awful I'd never have done it, but I truly never expected to have such a rough ride - I just thought a few weeks of the usual side effects and I'll be "fixed", but I was wrong. Given the choice, I'd rather feel how I did BEFORE I started back on the med-train four months ago, I just don't know how long it will take to get back to that.
At least I had a full range of emotions then and I understand my irrational thoughts for what they were, but at least I could switch them off, I just can't now, I'm constantly obsessing about my mental and emotional health and I just can't seem to control it and it rages and races all the time, I don't seem to get many breaks, but when I do, I just tell myself "this is what all the suffering is for, so I can enjoy "normal" moments or day".
Onwards and backwards.
sickandtired
02-03-12, 09:36
:bighug1: sending you both big hugs,hope your meds start working soon xx
Yes Lauz - it is hell! Never been as bad as this in my life! When I first went on Prozac 15 years ago - yes initial side effects - but got on with things - then a bereavement in Oct, etc, etc, being messed about - never known anything like it! We'll get better together -Laura x:hugs:
Thanks sick and tired for your hugs - you are kind x
Thanks Donna, I hope you're continuing to get better and better.
Laura, yep, we'll get through it, there's no other option. I've been through worse and survived. I went through worse with and without meds and got through, but I don't want to go back there either. It's just a case of deciding what to do, continue as I am and hope that the side effects pass, or cut my losses and go through withdrawal either way I hope I come out the other side smiling soon.
stormyok10
02-03-12, 10:18
Hi Stormsky,
Good to hear you have been off meds for 6mths, I have also stopped taking them about 4weeks ago, still having some bad days but trying to stay positive. I have thought on a few occasions to start again on med but always at the back of my mind is " come on girl you can get through this on your own". Do you still get days like this very often now or does it become less frequent?
Thanks for reading this
Hi Stormyok10, sorry I can't answer your question, and I don't know if Stormsky has read it yet.
So, after a chat with my husband yesterday, I decided to stop both the paroxetine (now down to 5mg) and the mirtazepine (been on 30mg for 2 weeks) because I'm just feeling worse and worse, so decided to cut my losses and hope that stopping the meds (although I know there are likely to be withdrawal issues too) will improve things. I'm constantly obsessing, feel anxious and scared about EVERYTHING, I can't eat and am continuing to lose weight. I've lost all my normal emotions, no love, laughter, joy, just a constant fear and dread. NONE of which I had before going on meds in November.
I haven't consulted my GP and am not seeing her until next Monday (a week today). I'm sure she'll frown but will understand.
After several hours in bed and not being able to sleep I decided to take 7.5mg of mirt. I did eventually get off to sleep but only for 4 hours, and woke up this morning with the usual anx, before vomitting, something I haven't done for weeks.
I've taken the day off work and so has my husband as he was very concerned about me this morning.
Can anyone PLEASE reassure me that I will be the me I was before I started swallowing these tablets soon.
I know cold turkey is not the advisable way to go, but I really want them out of my system sooner rather than later.
nicola1980
05-03-12, 11:26
Hi lauz sorry your feeling so bad but i would seriously reconsider going cold turkey especially off 2 ADs, as youve prob read ive had awful withdrawal off cit and still struggling now nearly 3 wks on! Withdrawal can be nasty why dont you have a word with your gp even if its just a telephone consultation? Good luck :hugs: x x
Thanks Nicola, I really don't know what to do for the best - I have sisters wedding to attend in 3 weeks and I just want some resemblance of myself back for that.
I know cold turkey isn't the best idea, but given that I've been on the mirt a relatively short length of time, and down to only 5mg of paroxetine anyway, I'm not sure what the worst that can happen will be.
sickandtired
05-03-12, 11:39
aw Lauz dont go cold turkey hun,please!
I was on tricylcic AD,s years ago (theyre not as strong as SSRI's ) and I really struggled to come off them,even though I tapered slowly.......I was a mess,crying on the sofa all day.Please think twice about the meds....do it slowly xxx
nicola1980
05-03-12, 13:56
Thanks Nicola, I really don't know what to do for the best - I have sisters wedding to attend in 3 weeks and I just want some resemblance of myself back for that.
I know cold turkey isn't the best idea, but given that I've been on the mirt a relatively short length of time, and down to only 5mg of paroxetine anyway, I'm not sure what the worst that can happen will be.
Could you maybe just cut your paroxetine out for now and then in a week if you still feel the same lower the mirtazapne to 15mg? I suffered so much with cit withdrawal even tho id lowered my dose down prior to being switched, you really might suffer badly going cold turkey off both of them xx
nicola1980
05-03-12, 18:47
Hi hun hope your feeling a bit better :hugs: have you decided what to do or you still going the cold turkey route? xx
I'm gonna take 7.5mg mirt again tonight and no paroxetine. I'll see how I feel in the morning and if I feel crappy I'll take the 5mg paroxetine in the morning and see what happens.
I've only been on 30mg for 2 weeks and I know that dropping down to 7.5mg is a big drop but I guess better than nothing at all. I just need to feel again, I wasn't suffering with depression before meds, and my anxiety was no where near this bad and I'm obsessing ALL the time, it's really be 24hrs a day sometimes.
Well, after 2 nights are reducing the mirt from 30mg to 7.5mg and I can feel my emotions coming back. I know it could be partly the relief of reducing, I don't know.
I was heaving again this morning (after my first fag I should add), and my head feels a bit whooshy but I think that's also from not taking the paroxetine, so I took 5mg this morning in the hope this will eleviate it, but on the whole, I think I feel better than I did two days ago.
Hi - how are you feeling this morning - I had a dizzy spell in the night - frightened me and felt sick.
Just trying to wake up with a cuppa - speak to you soon Laura x
---------- Post added at 09:22 ---------- Previous post was at 09:18 ----------
Lauz - think it is the paroxetine causing the problems too - but reducing the mirt will bring your emotions back.
Hi Laura - don't feel marvellous, but I've got some emotions today which is nice. Given the choice out of morning heaving with emotions, or no emotions and no morning heaving, I'll take the morning heaving and emotions anyday.
Oh bless you - you will get better soon - you'll see x:hugs:
cathycrumble
06-03-12, 11:00
Laurz I know how bad it has been for you as I have been following you on here and you are right these antidepressents do make you feel worse but they are supose to make us feel better in the long run.
I have been like you trying to find a decent anti d and OMG it has been rough the prozac were the pits ans Laura also knows because we both suffered.
I went med fee and I was ok but I have been through a bad few years and I feel I need somthing so I am now taking sertraline I have been on it 12 days I am suffering with sickness and fear in my tummy but I need to get motivated instead of sitting on my bum. I feel they are not as bad as prozac finger's crossed.
Laura How are you now did you go dizzy while in bed. I am sure you will be ok I think it is the side effect. how is you tummy do you feel sick and nervy of a morning? I have this stupid Blood pressur fear.
I have got my CBT today so I hope it helps with this phobia I have.
keep going girls lots of love:hugs:
Cathy xx
Hi Cathy - good luck with the CBT today - yes that dizzy spell and feeling sick was horrible my head felt as though it was burning up! Like you so fed up with it all - yes that Prozac was hell for us wans't it! I was only just thinking of last week when I could not function at all! Crying all the time - at least that has stopped a bit!
Yes I do have churning stomachs especially on waking and in the morning - just like to sit in chair and be quiet!
Hope we have a bit better day - you never know. Laura x:hugs:
cathycrumble
06-03-12, 11:18
Yes me to just sit in chair and be quiet.
What a pain lol.
Cathy xx
I really feel for you both, we've all gone through some horrendous periods on these meds haven't we.
I struggle to understand it personally, maybe I should have tried another SSRI rather than mirt. I was on paroxetine for many years and apart from the initial start up side effects they worked wonderfully (not this time round though). I've only ever tried one other SSRI and that was prozac, I didn't get on with it either - don't remember much about the experience other than spending several weeks with my head down the toilet.
I'm going to persevere with coming off mirt and reducing/coming off paroxetine and hopefully go med free for a while to give my body, mind, daughter and husband a break. If I don't either a) return to me pre-med self, or b) improve from where I am at the moment, I'll consider trying something else, maybe cit or sert but one thing I'm certain of is that these meds have made me WORSE than I was before I started taking them, and not just for a couple of weeks, it's been 4 months now.
Well, I thought I'd post a little update (partly for my own records as I don't keep a mood diary).
Having reduced the mirt on Sunday night (5 night ago tonight), I'm feeling tons better. The foggy mind is a lot clearer, I'm not obsessing as much (hardly at all today), I've got my emotions back and I can concentrate again (I even watched a whole TV programme tonight and I don't remember the last time I was able to do that).
I will add, that my GP has been pressing me to reduce the paroxetine, but everytime I went below 10mg I felt terrible, and before the mirt, everytime I went above 15mg of paroxetine, I felt terrible (the doc wanted me at 20mg as it is the minimum recommended theraputic dose) which is what led me to having a really bad period after New Years Day and ending up on the mirt. I'm glad I haven't come off the paroxetine completely, seemingly it just needed more time and a lower dose.
Tonight I feel exactly as I should - not high, not low, just exactly as I should without a heavy dark cloud hanging over me and without my brain racing, raging and obsessing non stop. I know I will wake up in the morning feeling less than perfect, but I'm hoping it will pass as quickly as it did today.
I'm keeping everything crossed, but this time it doesn't feel like an unstable normality like it has over the past few weeks/months.
Sometimes, too high a dose can be as bad/worse as not enough.
I don't want anyone to think I'm anti-mirt, I'm not, it gave me some relief, it has helped me sleep and for a short time gave me back my appetite after losing over a stone and a half, I just don't think it was the one for me but I'd have regretted not trying it having read so many success stories and personally knowing someone for whom it literally saved there life after being suicidal.
I am very anti-Mirt. It nearly ruined my life. But that doesn't mean that it won't help others, because we are ALL so very different (just see Ingenious' success with it).
It started well for me but horrible changes happened - I'm not a "majorly" depressed person, I just suffer with minor anxiety. But the Mirt was making me worse, it actually DEVELOPED a panic disorder and then there was the obsessive thoughts.
I am going to be drug free from now on. Like someone said in another thread on here, the drugs have so many side effects and we don't actually know what we're doing to our bodies long term.
BUT if they help you and you feel they work for you, please stick with them. All of this is just my opinion and because of my experiences.
Totally agree with you both - not anti Mirtazapine but it made my depression worse (felt empty) but it works well for others. Like Lauz says - good for sleep and appetite - gained a stone fairly quicky but needed to.
On Sertraline - lets see how this one goes (3rd time lucky) I hope!
Yep I need to edit my post really as I don't want to be scaring anyone who is new to the drug. "Anti Mirtazapine" is a bit strong as it did start off well for me.
It's amazing for sleep. But I always felt so low the day after.
I still have a few left to take as I am supposed to be taking 7.5 every few days, to 'gently' let it come out my system. But I feel so damn good after not taking it, I'm afraid of taking it tonight :(
You're quite entitled to your opinion Mono :) If it didn't work for you long term and actually caused a new problem, then I think to share that on the forum will be helpful to someone else... as they might have the same symptoms. No-one likes to feel that their experience, either good or bad is unique to them.
Glad you're feeling better.
Belle x
Well, to add to my last post I've had a shitty 36hrs, it feels like Groundhog Day :(
I've felt really disconnected, DP really, and associated low mood. I was so exhausted last night I went to bed very early and didn't take the 7.5mg of mirt because I fell asleep.
I've only started feeling more connected and like myself over the last hour or so and I can only hope tomorrow is a better day.
I'm going to reduce the meds as best as I can and see how I am without them for a few weeks before considering trying anything else.
Thanks Belle, nice to hear from you :)
Lauz Lea - I hope you're feeling better now? I am taking my last EVER 7.5 mg of Mirt tonight as I've been tapering off. I feel better the day after NOT taking it, which is most strange. My wife thinks that I don't need anti-Ds which is why I'm having a negative reaction to it.
I'm going to the London for the day tomorrow with my brother as I'm off work this week and I can't WAIT. In the past, I'd be dreading it so I am definitely feeling better.
And coming off Mirt is a DODDLE compared to Paroxetine (for me anyway).
Good luck guys, my thoughts are with you - keep me updated on how you're doing.
Well, its been nearly a week off mirt ad 4 days off paroxetine, and besides the typical SSRI discontinuation effects (like a wooshy head and zaps), I'm feeling better mentally and emotionally.
As soon as I stopped the mirt I started retching and vomitting again and this has continued pretty much daily, but it was the paroxetine that caused this in the first place so I just have to hope that as the paroxetine lowers in my system day by day the retching and vomitting will stop. I don't know if I quit the paroxetine too fast (i.e. 10mg to 5mg in just under to weeks then 5mg to 0mg in a week), but now I haven't taken it for a few days I'm loathed to take it again just to alleviate the wooshing and zaps but I'll have to see how long I can tolerate it for.
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