eden.eden
10-02-12, 15:08
Ive been dealing with depressive episodes for several years quietly on my own but in Nov asked for help from GP as cant deal with it alone any more. Am on Mirtrazapine (but havent noticed any change) and just started counselling. Feeling dead inside. Dealing with long term issues as well as recent unemployment and financial issues. I live alone.
I am a very private person and on the persuasion of my GP opened up to 4 close friends about it although haven't told anyone else. 2 friends have been good, 2 have been conspicuous by their absence. One of the latter visited me today and told me I make it very difficult for my friends to help me and that I was really snappy with everyone "all my friends said so". I'm not aware of doing this but know my sarcastic sense of humour does get misunderstood sometimes - but if my friends who I have trusted so much to confide in are talking about me in this way what really is the point?
A few years ago I had cancer and was overwhelmed by friends helping and just being there for me. This feels so much worse and yet I feel so totally and utterly alone. If those I think of as 'close friends' feel this way about me I feel the only thing to do is to shut up shop and go.
I am a very private person and on the persuasion of my GP opened up to 4 close friends about it although haven't told anyone else. 2 friends have been good, 2 have been conspicuous by their absence. One of the latter visited me today and told me I make it very difficult for my friends to help me and that I was really snappy with everyone "all my friends said so". I'm not aware of doing this but know my sarcastic sense of humour does get misunderstood sometimes - but if my friends who I have trusted so much to confide in are talking about me in this way what really is the point?
A few years ago I had cancer and was overwhelmed by friends helping and just being there for me. This feels so much worse and yet I feel so totally and utterly alone. If those I think of as 'close friends' feel this way about me I feel the only thing to do is to shut up shop and go.