Does hearing about suicide have an affect on you?

[theharvestmouse]

I saw one programme about the coroners court on BBC1 the other night and there was a case of a young woman, late 20's and she had committed suicide due to a long history of depression. THen there was a discussion about another woman on Radio5 the other day who committed suicide after being released by the mental health hospital, her parents took legal action against the hospital.

I know I could have turned off the tv/radio but I always want to listen to what happened, part out of curiosity and partly because I know that this could easily be me. In both cases their parents talked about periods of recovery and that they thought they were ok but then they would then get worse.

I suppose this just scares me because I know how bad I have been in the past few months, and although the suicidal thoughts are not here right now I know that they could come back. I just hope I can cope if I suffer a setback.

Just wondered if anyone else is affected by hearing about things like this. THe discussion on depression was good in raising awareness of it, and they also talked a bit about anxiety.

[DesperateDaisy]

Hi..I watched the same programme the other night. It kinda came at a bad time for me as I was at the lowest point I've been for a while. To be honest that programme, those girls cases, made me feel like even more of a loser. Because as much as I think about suicide, sometimes even making little plans in my head, I know I'll never be able to go through with it. To me, those girls had real courage, they made a choice and followed it through.

[Stormsky]

To me, those girls had real courage, they made a choice and followed it through.


Have to disagree, real courage would be staying and fighting to live!
Instead of giving up the fight, and opting out...

[theharvestmouse]

I agree Stormsky, it does take more courage to carry on trying to fight but I can understand why some people give up, but hearing about people who do just really gets me thinking.

[Carys]

Because as much as I think about suicide, sometimes even making little plans in my head, I know I'll never be able to go through with it. To me, those girls had real courage, they made a choice and followed it through.

No, real courage and bravery is in living with a severe mental health condition. I don't think 'courage' really is the issue here though, they were ILL and were not making a decision based on true logic and knowledge.

---------- Post added at 11:34 ---------- Previous post was at 11:30 ----------


but I can understand why some people give up

Yes, of course, :bighug1:I can see why hearing and watching something like this would make people have thoughts about choosing to die, but you have to hold on to the insight that you have now.....things can change and a depressive state will not always be so.

[swanlinnet]

It does disturb me ...and the people I know all say the same should ever we talk about it.

Vince

[Ingenious]

Yes, hearing/reading about it does still stop me in my tracks sometimes. I think if you have ever been to the suicidal point it's quite a traumatic thing and unlikely you will ever forget it. These days I tend to feel very sad for the person involved because they were unable to fight successfully against it, and sad they lost the will to live, I know what that feels like. And relieved and lucky that I'm still here, alive and kicking, and proof (as is everyone who has recovered from that black hole) that the will to live can and does come back.


I think committing suicide by jumping in front of a train or off a bridge into motorway traffic is extremely selfish. The latter would most likely cause additional fatalities as the vehicles swerve and brake. That's a horribly insensitive thing to say. People who are about to kill themselves no longer have a "self" left, they no longer have a reality where they are actually worrying about the consequences because they can only think about dying. Therefore, I can hardly see how it is their fault and how they can be labelled as selfish.

[haz]

In my opinion people who attempt suicide (and I'm speaking from personal experience) are not selfish, they are extremely ILL and cannot see any other option available to them at the time.

It's not that they don't WANT to live but they feel that they CANNOT continue living feeling the way they do.

Don't judge other people until you've been in their shoes.

[dabrucru]

i agree haz,these peolple are all but selfish! i have never attempted suicide, but i really feel sorry when someone commits or try to. i have a big fear of it, i mean when i feel really down, the thought starts, what if im losin it, what if I COMMIT SUICIDE, that s how i imagine it , with bold letters, i m not afraid of dying etc, just the tought of commiting one it really scares me, i love life, and i want to live it to the full, but i have this phobia of it. i think it all related to anxiety....:hugs:

[Connor_cbt]

I don't think I would ever commit suicide, the thought had flashed across my mind on particularly low days but just as a fleeting though that was soon dismissed. I'm not religious so I have the frame of mind that the end is the end, no afterlife, just nothing. So no matter how bad it gets it's better than not existing at all and there is always potential for things to improve as long as you stick around!

[Scared_11]

Yes I get this all the time. I suffered with intrusive thoughts of throwing myself off a building, hanging myself etc. these thoughts scared me to death as I would never want to harm my family I thought I had to get help so that I could prevent this from ever happening. I had CBT which helped a lot with the thoughts. Basically I have a fear that I will eventually become suicidal and not care about my family and the consequences etc. I became a lot better around August last year then the tragic news of Gary Speed in November set all my fears off again. I was back to square one for abit.

Then I started feeling less worried again and then I also heard the news about the young woman who killed herself and her parents went to court as they felt she wa mistreated in the hospital and this has set my gets off again. It's a very scary thing as it sets off the whole 'did they think like me' 'why if I start to feel like them?'

[theharvestmouse]

Hi Scared, I just replied to your thread but you raised another point that I also connected with. THe Gary Speed thing hit me hard as well, because at that time I was already going through a bad time. I thought that if he had commited suicide yet he had a lovely wife and kids and no money troubles, then I was in a worse place than even he was so I started thinking that I had less to live for. Luckily I got through that bad time and am not as bad but when I hear about these cases it really scares me I might end up being one of them.

[robinbrum]

Whenever I go and see my GP to review my situation, I am always asked the question, "Have you had any suicidal thoughts lately?"
I never know how to answer this question. When things get really bad I find myself asking, "Is there any point living like this?" Sometimes I answer in the negative - so does that make me suicidal? I have never really thought about how I would do it as I fear the process of dying, in any shape or form. And the fact is, I want to live. Just not like this.
I try and avoid programmes on this subject as I find them difficult to deal with. When I'm feeling stronger I can deal with them and see them in perspective. When I'm feeling down and bit vulnerable, these sort of things make me worse. It's one of the reasons I avoid watching the news sometimes, or any current affairs programmes...there always seems to be something to be bring you down. I had it when I saw the coverage of Whitney Houston's death the other day. So tragic, so avoidable..
There you go...

[littleredhen]

yes, it affects me a lot. I get terribly upset by it because although I have never actually made a serious attempt, I think about it all the time and I know HOW bad I feel, so when I hear of people doing it, it think - bloody hell, how BAD must they have been feeling to go that far when even at my worst, I've not done it yet. I feel absolutely terrible for them, their last moments must have been truly awful. One of the reasons I've never done it is because I still have some recognition ofwhat it would do to my family. They would never forgive themselves for not having been able to to more and I couldn't do it to them. So I also get to feeling really bad for the families left behind.

Yes it does affect me a lot. :weep:

[chrisl]

its been along time since i have been on this site for various reasons . im not much good with words but to say that sum one is selfish for ending there life ? . that person that made that decision to end there life at that point in time was doing the only thing they thought was left . they were thinking it was the best thing for every one ? they cud not see any other option ? they new it would hurt alot of people but still they had to do it . when you are that low and you have to be that low to attempt sum thing like that you are not selfish you dont see any thing left to do . you have had so much pain in your life you just cannot take it any moor . you do think of other people when you make that decision because you dont want to put them throw any moor pain you believe it i the best thing for every one . you are at the lowest point in your life and just cannot take it any moor . people do not understand how much pain you are in to end it all unless you have been there . yes we all now there is help out there for people but when you have tried every thing you can , you can only take so much pain in your life . we all have different breaking points . i can understand how people end there life even if it does mean leaving the ones that love you

[DesperateDaisy]

I really think that those here who say suicide is selfish or cowardly are being a little judgemental! Not everything changes for the better, not everyone has support, sometimes there IS no way forward and that doesn't change. Until you live with NO-ONE and NOTHING in your life don't judge when others really do have only one option to take the pain away!!

[theharvestmouse]

I agree, I can understand why people go through with it, I can actually see the logic in it sometimes.

[Connor_cbt]

Whenever I go and see my GP to review my situation, I am always asked the question, "Have you had any suicidal thoughts lately?"


I went to a Samaritans training day and they always ask that on every call. Don't read too much into it, it's simply just to let you know that it is ok to talk about it because sometimes people do think about it but don't know how to bring it into the conversation :o)

I think that anyone that's had a really low period in their life is likely to have suicide cross their minds at some brief point, we're all aware from the news and tv etc that people quite frequently end their own lives for one reason or another so when we're low it pops up sometimes. I think though that it's persistent, lingering thoughts that really mean you might need a little advice to help deal with them properly. That being said of course, if any thoughts are disturbing upsetting then it's a good idea to go talk to your GP for advice.

[theharvestmouse]

My therapist used to ask me if I had had any thoughts of trying to harm or kill myself, I said no but I sometimes wish I had never been born.

[angie21]

hi, just reading above posts about suicide, back in april 1995, my boyfriend at the time commited suicide by hanging himself in my kitchen, it was my five year old son who found him in the morning, i didnt see him jus run out to a neighbour, called an ambulance,
it was so out of the blue, it was a thursday nite, had few people round for a drink, end of nite everybody left, had enough to drink and went to bed, he sat on the edge of the bed, talking to me saying am to good for him, had lost his job few months before, wasnt able to see is two kids, his mum was very ill, kept saying to him dont be daft, i loved him, everything will be ok and jus cum into bed get some sleep, he got up and left the bedroom, never thought anything of it, fell asleep, never saw him again, to this day i feel very guilty, wish i stayed up, make sure he is ok, never in a million years did i think he would do any thing like that, he was such a lovely guy, he was only 25 years old,
yes i had thought about ending my life e few times, i know deep down i dont wont to end my life, was just i cry for help, i know i will never even try it again,
i do understand why they do it, all depends in the situation they are in at the time, if they have family, close friends, will affect the people they leave behind,
sorry for the long post guys, i could go on and on about this.
hope every one out there is having a good day


angie xxxx

[gregcool]

I must say, I think that people who are driven to take there own lives, do not just suddenly think ( I can't cope anymore so I'm going to kill myself )
I think they are overpowered with and disabled with the will,to be them selfs anymore and there personality changes so dramatically , It's out of there control and normal thinking of the real world, prob almost like there on drugs and are feeling this urge to kill them selfs and are paralysed in a way they can not avoid doing it.almost in a kind of walking trance . I don't think they sit down and say " right I'm going to kill myself because I can't cope. " and be selfish.so my heart goes out to anyone being driven to these horrid thoughts that infests a person with the overwhelming thaught to take there life.

[GT]

read this thread it expalins our thoughts and why x http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=110202