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Wannabeloved85
20-06-06, 12:35
Hey,
I just wanted to start a poll to see how alone or not so alone i am! I feel,at presant,im the only person tackling a mountain!
What is your agoraphobia 'status'?

darkangel
20-06-06, 13:40
hi
I have been agoraphobic for 9 yrs but I am nearly recovered and for 3 yrs i couldnt leave the safety of my bedroom - could only go to the toilet with someone, etc. Had anxiety and panic attacks 24/7.
it took me a long time to move downstairs and ages to be able to sit in my livingroom etc. The first time I put something in my outside bucket, I felt I had climbed Everest .
But it can be done - you can overcome agoraphobia - I live on my own now, drive around my town centre (I am practising driving further afield), attend a night class at college, go shopping (still practising on this), can go to cinema, just back from a holiday in Spain!!
I still have the symptoms but I control them better - and have learned to live with it and accept it is ANXIETY.
Take care everyone and there is hope

Darkangel x



........life is for living not just for surviving

Wannabeloved85
20-06-06, 13:57
wow!! ok, now THAT is a success story!! THANKYOU SO MUCH for sharing that!! youve done extremely well!
Becci x

PurpleRain
20-06-06, 15:01
Hi Becci,
Your not alone but i know how you feel about being on a lonely moutain!
My agoraphobia started about 10 years ago,i couldnt leave the house then started being able to leave when with someone else,now im working on leaving my home alone!! Its not easy but im making myself go out at least once a day,sometimes i just cant face it alone but i make sure i get out at least once(even if its just a walk to the end of the road when its dark!!)
It is getting easier and it is possible to recover from agoraphobia,in my opinion everyone can recover!!
Good luck,feel free to pm me anytime if you need a chat!

Dark angel,your story is inspirational,thank-you!!

Take care xx

Ammeg
21-06-06, 10:51
hello wanna!!
Of course ur not alone and it will get better!! I have been agrophobic for 4 yrs now- it started really bad out of the sudden- i couldnt do anything, couldnt answer fone or even go in the back garden!! But it got better- this year is my year to say beep it- im learnin to drive and ive been on holiday, I still have trouble goin out alone but im gettin there!! Some days u have to force uself but it gets easier and easier!! I can now go anywhere with me fella and im hopin soon i will get to go anywhere alone!!
Hope your feelin better bout this awful illness!! lol
Ammegxxxx

chucklehound
21-06-06, 11:57
I cannot get out of the street at the moment but I did start to get out and take my son to school. I stopped and now it seems impossible again!

Take care

Chuckle

xxxx

emmy
22-06-06, 15:15
i can walk down my street on my own but any further i have to be with someone....

your not a lone we all in same boat in one way or another

xxxxxxxx

if it looks like it works and feels like it works then it works!!!

freakedout
24-06-06, 00:12
Hi everyone,

My experience is mixed. I could have ticked a few of the poll options, depending on what day I read the poll.

Some days I can do so much more than other days but I very rarely go out alone. I did so recently when I visited my freind who lives about 10 miles away, this was my first outing alone in so long. My friend also suffers panic attacks and agoraphobia and in a strange way this made me feel more confidant because I knew that when I got to her place, she would understand how I may be feeling. Of course I had my usual panic attacks but this was a big achievement for me. Since then I have been less adventurous, I have not been out alone.

I dislike making big plans, I have too much anxiety leading up to them, I try to just take each day one day at a time. Some days I do not leave my home, some days I cannot walk into my back garden, other days I can walk to the post office but then not go in if there is a queue. Some days I can go to the supermarket but dash around as though I am 'on speed', with the overall aim of getting out of there as fast as I can!!

There are things I can never do though, like the hairdressers, college! The fear and of not being able to get to a place of safety, or the fear of having a panic attack is too great, and while there are some truly inspiring stories on this site, I struggle to find it within myself to believe that I will ever be free from the psychological torment of agoraphobia.

Ah well, you can always rely on me for a bit of negativity, I never intend to be this way, it just happens.

Bye folks, and take care all.

Freaky

chedda
24-06-06, 19:39
Hia all :D
i dont go out my garden and even then can go a bit dizzy and out of it ...lol but i will improve slowly but surely i know this can be beaten and there is so much positiveness on here it really helps.Strange thing is when i had this years ago i had claustraphobia and couldnt stay in without panic.
take care cheryl

xoxbabygalxox
24-06-06, 20:44
hi evryone!
wow its so good 2 hear people stories and it actually gives me abit of hope!!
i have only got really bad and cant go nowhere since the begining of the year.
i feel like im stuck in this situation but hearing other peoples sucess has made me think i can do it go out and lead a normal life without anxiety or panic and that nothing will happen 2 me if i leave my front door. easia sed then done though!!!!
so thanku evry1 but im sure we will all get over this eventually so gd luck im sure i will need it! we will just have 2 take it 1 step at a time!
take care all xxx

Eva May
21-11-07, 13:31
I can go to work and meet my family or friends but all of this takes place very close to home and I always need to have my car with me. Not too bad I suppose but it's very upsetting and frustrating because I used to be able to do whatever I wanted and now I can't so much

PUGLETMUM
23-11-07, 18:50
:ohmy: :weep: :D :hugs: :winks: :yesyes: ive just read this thread and i imagined us all everyday dealing with this individually,and feeling so unconnected when in reality there is someone out there doing/thinking the same as you probably at the exact same time!!! amazing really when to think that before sites like this we never knew that, and knowing it makes us feel better! we all just want to feel as though we are the same as someone else i think? and theres nothing wrong with that:yesyes: all my best to all my fellow agoraphobics:hugs: and thankyou darkangel for continuing to post about your recovery because it gives soooo much hope, and well done you for doing it:flowers:

Richie
24-11-07, 21:23
yeah used to do many activities, some pretty extrovert!! but have turned into a recluse cause of the agoraphobia. Some days cant even leave my bedroom which is my safe place with phone, internet and cuddly toys !!
On medication i can venture out to take dog for walk or see a friend etc
the poll was interesting and also anyone leaving comments ,if they feel able to say what they can or can't do
Luv Richie xxx

maxine
26-11-07, 11:48
Was "wouldn't leave the house" agoraphobic for 3 1/2 years , felt crap hated it the usual, took about a year to go out.

Have a job, driving test Friday, cimena, shopping solo etc, really great until a few weeks ago where i started panicing again, however it's a blip i am not going back to that bleedin place again. Not doing it, not letting it take over me again.

Richie
26-11-07, 12:34
Good for you Maxine, thank God you got over it.
Once you've been in that nightmare their is NO WAY you would ever want to go back to it :(
God i hate it too and have been trying all ways, paying therapists, trying on my own because there is no CBT where i live.
Maxine it is just a "blip" and maybe do you think tis the thought of the driving test on friday thats triggered it off
Luv Richie XXXXX
congrats in advance with driving test:)

maxine
26-11-07, 17:19
Hey thank you Richie, i'll be glad to get h thing over and done with, I was tempted to put itoff for a few weeks but i'll be just as nervous then as i am now.

Have you tried the "no panic" telephone CBT it is what i done and it help so much and it's free if you join up £10 for a years membership.

I'll go find the link if you want to give it a bash?

efc2411
04-12-07, 20:19
Some in this thread have been worse then me but recovered, making me think alls not lost again

Angel64
20-01-08, 10:37
Hi, thanks for starting the poll !

I think 'freakedout' wrote my story for me ! I am the same but
find that rather than 'one day I can go out - the next I can't', it can
also be, that I can't go out all day because of the anxiety but then in
the evening I go into 'positive' mode and can go over to the local for a
couple of hours. I usually wake up 'positive' so if I need to go shopping
I will go early before the anxiety gets a chance to rise.

Some of you will already know that my car was stolen last week and it
was my security blanket. Last year I had a therapist and also did an
online cbt course arranged by my GP but dont think I made the most
of it and soon fell back into my old ways.

I decided that 2008 was 'my' year and I was really going to try and so
have done a 1 hour exposure each day (either to the park,just driving
or going shopping) I will admit I only did 40 minutes one day as I just
couldn't cope !

On Thursday I went on a bus, something I really thought I couldnt do,
I had 30 minutes of should/shouldnt I but then went out and just
jumped on it, it seemed so unreal and was only a short journey.

Yesterday I got to the stop but after 5 minutes was shaking so much
but didnt give in, went into my local and had a shandy (I do not think
alcohol is the way to go.....but sitting in there calmed me down) I
then got the bus into town, did a very quick shop and came back on
the bus.

I know the journey is going to be a hard and long one, but knowing
we can share our journey with others that understand makes it easier.

Good luck to everyone, :hugs:

Christine. xx:flowers:

caz7
20-01-08, 18:01
Hi i'm new to this website! i've had agoraphobia for over ten years, i can go about six miles on my own, work and socialise as long as i have my car(my crutch with me). I had some therapy at the doctors which didn't help. Because i can lead a life to a certain standard most of my family and friends don't take me seriously. I have just been asked out by a lovely man, so when do i tell him about my agoraphobia?, before or after the first date. Any advise would be more than welcome as i find telling someone new normally makes them run for the hills. He also lives in a village about 8 miles away! so i can't hide it for long. x

Eva May
21-01-08, 13:40
Hi Caz. I would wait and see how the first date goes and if you think it's going well and you would like to see him again, then I would tell him on the first date, you know when he asks you about yourself. If he runs for the hills then you have not wasted any time on him and will have saved yourself a lot of stress. Let us know how it goes anyway :D

Lexi
25-01-08, 12:34
Wow darkangel thats a really inspiring story and christine your so brave :yesyes:, im at a wont leave the house place at the moment :( feels like everest in front of me, i just wish the world made more sense to me :lac::lac:
good luck everyone

clair7
24-04-08, 01:28
Hi all,
I quite new to all this agoraphobia lark, have been suffering with it now just over a year but thats quite enough for me!!
Somedays i am so anxious that i cant go out but others i can just about make it into town shopping with my boyfriend. I find it really difficult to go in the car for a long time or even get on a bus.
Its hard though as i dont seem to be feeling more confident about doing things after ive done them if that makes any sense?! things seem just as hard each time i try :( oh well, will keep trying, am supposed to be going to a funeral tomorrow and am petrified-arrrrr!!
I agree with Lexi, darkangel you have done so well and christine you're so brave to keep at it like you do.
Take care everyone

lennons_mammy
23-10-08, 22:42
I put can't/won't leave the street.

reachersgal
24-10-08, 17:31
Hi,

I've very recently realised that the cluster of things i avoid is due to agoraphobia. I have been aware for the last 6 months how small my world is becoming. I find travelling outside my home town extremely difficult and definately can not drive myself out. I can't be a passenger in any type of vehichle (unless my husband - for some reason that seems ok - except have become much more anxious when we do motorways and that is making me wish to avoid them). I had a meltdown at the beginning of the week due to not been able to go on my daughters school trip it meant a bus ride and also the other scary thing of being not incontol of the timetable and hence not able to 'get out' if I needed to.

I'm not good in any situation where I can't escape or am not in control of - cinema, meetings, church during the sermon, even stood talking to someone for a great length of time, supermarkets very large stores where I can't see out side, lifts, motorways, bridges, traffic jams, long queues- particularly if can't see out side the shop. If I was going to a friends I would drive and park away from the house so I can't be blocked in.

I didn't always used to be so bad, but I have done long journeys just got home and realised how horrific it was, got home crying, shaking etc and gradually avoiding more and more. I've had this I think for a long time. The anticipatory anxiety I have when I think I will be faced with something I fear if crippling and makes dealing with the event I'm trying to face feel even harder.

I am determined to sort this out, as I can see things getting worse. I have spent the week in and out of waves of anxiety and trying to tell myself I'm recoverying from early in the week, because I can see how I could easily think it was being outside, even walking to kids to school has been challenging this week.

Thankyou for listening. Hope I haven't seemed too negative.

Best Wishes

sunshine-lady
05-11-08, 20:23
I have had agoraphobia for around 10 years, but am steadily getting better.

At my worst I didn't go out of the house for more than 18 months and refused to open the curtains, open the door or answer the phone.

I am lucky to have a very suportive husband and a comprehensive mental health team, with a lot of help and encouragment have come on leaps and bounds.

I still can't go out alone, but can go out with my husband walking the dogs at quiet times. I go to a resource centre for people with mental health issues, I get a taxi with someone who lives close by (provided by my mental health team).

I find going to the supermarket a nightmare and at times I just get so anxious I just can't go. My husband doesn't make a fuss of this and will go shopping on his own rather than have me being a jibbering wreck!

My husband and myself now go away on holiday, I have to have a huge dose of diazepam before I fly, but as long as I am with my husband 24/7 I cope really well and feel a real sense of achievement.

I am currently having CBT and hope that I continue to improve, maybe one day I will be able to go out alone.

Lou17
03-12-08, 06:40
Ive had agoraphobia since I was 15/16 and I was housebound upuntil I was 21 due to a fear of loosing control of my bowels.after cognitive therapy I felt alot more confident within myself. I started to gradually expose my self to the outside world by taking baby steps which was quite infuriating at the time, but it did work. Ive realised patience is needed to overcome this, we cannot leap to the way we use to be unfortunately. The biggest help for me was to turn my fear into excitement, I began to realise if I rewarded myself everytime I ventured out my mind would think more positively about attempting to do something. OK the initial panic was their at first be after a while it became gradually easier. I had a really good year and a half, but unfortunately my brother asked me to a big event and it frightened me. So.... Ive had a relaps and its killing me! Ive tasted freedom and I want it back the only problem is Ive got ALL the fear back, I knew how difficult it was the first time and my mind doesnt want to go through that again. Its now found another escape as I keep fearing that I will now wet myself, which is alot harder to predict than the other one. Its been 6 months and its so frustrating, as this feels like a whole new experience again. I just dont seem to see how I can get over this its soooo intense.

clair7- I too had to go to a funeral when I was at my worst, dont worry you'll get through it! I found that drink helped at the wake. Before that use medication, but not alot if your going to drink:hugs: Good Luck!

Lou17
03-12-08, 06:42
Ive had agoraphobia since I was 15/16 and I was housebound upuntil I was 21 due to a fear of loosing control of my bowels.after cognitive therapy I felt alot more confident within myself. I started to gradually expose my self to the outside world by taking baby steps which was quite infuriating at the time, but it did work. Ive realised patience is needed to overcome this, we cannot leap to the way we use to be unfortunately. The biggest help for me was to turn my fear into excitement, I began to realise if I rewarded myself everytime I ventured out my mind would think more positively about attempting to do something. OK the initial panic was their at first be after a while it became gradually easier. I had a really good year and a half, but unfortunately my brother asked me to a big event and it frightened me. So.... Ive had a relaps and its killing me! Ive tasted freedom and I want it back the only problem is Ive got ALL the fear back, I knew how difficult it was the first time and my mind doesnt want to go through that again. Its now found another escape as I keep fearing that I will now wet myself, which is alot harder to predict than the other one. Its been 6 months and its so frustrating, as this feels like a whole new experience again. I just dont seem to see how I can get over this its soooo intense.

clair7- I too had to go to a funeral when I was at my worst, dont worry you'll get through it! I found that drink helped at the wake. Before that use medication, but not alot if your going to drink

rocklover
30-12-08, 10:07
Hi, none of the choices on your poll exactly apply to me, but I know that I suffer from agoraphobia in a mild way. I can go out into town and beyond (drove 20 odd miles to my sister's yesterday), but I have very anxious feelings whilst doing all of these things.

Recently, I have been having full blown painc attacks before setting off to my boyfriend's house which is a 45 min drive mainly on the motorway. The panic attack is always awful and I feel so ill, the effects generally last all night, but I force myself to go because I know the minute I stop, then it will make me worse and I'll be too scared to go out anywhere.

tigger1964
06-01-09, 08:28
i had this awful phobia years ago and bet it, i was well for 10 years, then a panic attack happened out of nowhere and ive allowed myself to get worse over the past few months. It can be beaten, and i will beat it again.

you can get over it we all can and it a slow mountain to climb .

take care

angelhair
17-02-09, 22:44
I can't leave the street unless I have Xanax and I still am fearful, but can cope easier. I just recently found out I had agoraphobia (before everyone said I was just a nervous person suffering from depression), even though I've the symptoms since I was 16. It's gotten to the worse point the past year with so many stressful family problems. Now I am scared to even ride into town. I know no one else with this, so I love reading what everyone else who suffers from this has to say.

eurotrashcub
22-04-09, 16:52
I believe that this poll should include the option:

I am now a recovered agoraphobic
and
I am an agoraphobic in recovery and although my movement is limited I go out often

I am myself a recovered agoraphobic and I should be allowed to participate in the poll!!! But most importantly, it will snend out a clear message that there is life after agoraphobia and that it can be overcome ( I was housebound for months and in recovery for 5 years more or less)

goth
24-04-09, 21:45
hi all ive had aggrophobia for 18 months now i can only go out with someone or with my dog my problem is i feel so tired most of the time so when i do try and go for a walk because of the tiredness i feel it sets of my anxiety and i start to panic ifear my legs will give way and this makes me panic more also i feel like im not breathing right its like i feel heavy in the chest area do any of you get feelings like this this stops me from doing a lot please let me no if you do im so down all the time i just feel like a waste of space sorry to go on love lin

Nechtan
08-08-09, 18:11
hi all ive had aggrophobia for 18 months now i can only go out with someone or with my dog my problem is i feel so tired most of the time so when i do try and go for a walk because of the tiredness i feel it sets of my anxiety and i start to panic ifear my legs will give way and this makes me panic more also i feel like im not breathing right its like i feel heavy in the chest area do any of you get feelings like this this stops me from doing a lot please let me no if you do im so down all the time i just feel like a waste of space sorry to go on love lin

I think the tiredness is quite a common thing. Its certainly a big part of my problem. And there is no consistancy to it. This week I walked further than I had before with no tiredness afterwards and yet some days I can be on the point of exhaustion with just a little walk.

4me2bfree
08-08-09, 18:47
Well, I voted "can only go limited distance with safe person"but, truth is, some days are better than others and my going somewhere (even with a safe person) can and will ONLY happen on one of my better days and ONLY if absolutely necessary.

Most days, I have a hard time even making it to my mailbox and that is only about a foot or so directly right out my front door. When I go to check my mail (and that is only if there is no one else around to do it) I will find myself scouring the streets in front of my house first to make sure no one is in view that may see me while I do so. First, I'll peek through all the front windows of my house and, if I don't see anyone outside, I will make it to my front door where I will "double-check" that the coast-is-clear by checking (and re-checking) that I can't see anyone (anywhere) by looking through my front door peephole. If I don't see anyone anywhere then, maybe, I will work up enough courage to open the front door and actually retrieve the mail but, for the most part, I end up to panicked to do so and I usually end up leaving the mail in the box for someone else to retrieve later. It drives me nuts but, no matter how hard I try, it just seems to be to much for me and I usually feel worse after even just trying so, of course, this "feeling worse" doesn't make it any easier for the next time so the vicious circle just continues.

teez
08-08-09, 19:18
well i think you,ve all pretty much covered it lol,,,i had severe aggie for years,,,couldnt ,wouldnt leave my front door,,,i found a huge lump in my stomach needed major surgery , and for some mad reason came out the hospital ,,,being able to go out,,i,ll never know why,,,i increased my going out till i even got a little job cleaning for a couple of hours once a week,,i had to walk to it, but i coped, i became so brave and confident,,well for three years i was free again ,,i had no panic attacks,, nothing. then four years ago i was diagnosed with breast cancer,,again i dealt with it,,hubby lost his job because he had to take me to chemo and radio therapy,,BIlls mounted,,baileffs,,you name it it all happened,,i lost my best friend of thirty years,,and that clinched it,,im really struggling again,,somedays leaving my front door is all i can do,,others i can go out in our car ,,shops are hard work,,but must be done,,im very stubborn so will get to how i was again ,,even if im doing it alone as my doctor doesnt believe in phobias,,lol

june
31-08-09, 10:53
i would not say i am agrophobic - but i do get terrible fears when i think of leaving the house. Most times - once i am out i am fairly OK.
But i also have this awful feeling of "what is the point of going anywhere unless you REALLY have to???"" and then i feel fed up because i have not been anywhere or seen anyone or talked to anyone (other than hubby).