:( please help

[StressedStudentNurse]

Hi Everyone.

Since new year I have gone downhill with my anxiety and panic attacks. I was put on antidepressant tablets to see if they would help me and so far, I haven't really noticed any affects but I have been told that they can take a while to kick in and start working. Things have got quite bad and its got to the point where I have been sent home from university to have support from my family which is helping and I have been home for about 3 weeks now. Last week, somebody I thought of as a very close friend who I have confided a lot in over the past few years about my issues said something to me which really hurt me. They told me I was f**ked up because I have panic attacks and pretty much called me every name under the sun. Its really hurt me and put me in a bad way. Im really struggling to manage my panic attacks - last night I had one which lasted almost 2 hours. I feel so rubbish about myself and Im struggling to pick myself back up. My family have said things to me to try to help me but nothing has helped. Can anyone help me out please? Thanks in advance. xx

[neroo]

You must know that deep down inside that anyone who would use your panic attacks against you ins't the greatest person and you can pretty must discount anything they say

[Aura]

Hi there:)

One thing I learned from panic attacks/anxiety/depression is that they could give you the chance and the gift to truly know more about yourself and the others around you. Let people who support you come closer to you and open up to them and definitely let those who do not go. I know is it a stressful and sad thing to do but you need to put YOU at the top of the list. I read somewhere this : those who can't handle me at my worst, won't enjoy me at my best. And you will get better I promise. I have been there too, with panic attacks everyday, lasting for two or three hours. Antidepressants do need time to kick in, hold on, better days will come

[flossie]

hiya stressedstudentnurse.
We all find out who are our 'friends' really are when times are tough. I think it's safe to say you don't have to feel bad about knocking this one off your Christmas card list. You will be surprised who will come up trumps for you, It's always from the least suspecting people.
Of course your friends comments have hurt you, they would anyone but it really does say more about this persons attitude, their ignorance and arrogance, than you as a person or of your anxieties. Friendships come and go throughout our lifetime. This is one where it's time to leave it behind you and move on. There are people out there much more worthy of your attention.
This sort of thing happens whether or not we have anxiety problems. If it hadn't been this I have no doubt whatsoever that there would have been something else she/he would have found fault with. Is this what you need from a friend? A friend should make you happy. File this in the 'it was nice while it lasted' file in your brain then go and find friends who are more mature in their thinking and value you for who you are including all your quirks and faults.
People who make you unhappy are better left behind.
Be kind to yourself.
x.

[saro]

Seems to me like you are going though a difficult time. Just remember that it wont last forever. Sometimes people turn out to be something you thought they weren't but just remember the good people in your life and try to stay happy, the hurt will go with time. Hope you feel better soon x

[loreen]

You really don't need people like that in your life.They have shown their true colours and you need to stay away from such a hurtful person.

Unless you have suffered from mental health issues you can not begin to understand how someone is feeling,but comments like that are way out of order,and unforgiveable.

Stay close to those who care and understand, and things will become better.

Take care

Loreen x

[Connor_cbt]

Hey SSN,
firstly congrats on studying nursing! I have every respect for people that even ATTEMPT
to become a nurse! so well done for being awesome :D

Secondly, people do and stay stupid, hurtful things. Wether they intend them to hurt as
much as they do I dont know but the things your friend said shows nothing but ignorance
and fear.

Many people still dont have a clue about mental health, it scares them because of all the
negative stereotypes we have about it so they ignore it and hope it never happens to
them. That kind of reaction, the rejection, name calling etc can be their way of
distancing themselves from something they dont understand/fear and also a way to self
affirm in a situation that clearly unsettles them.

The same or similar thing can be said about the stereotype of a rampant homophobic
guy that had secret homosexual thoughts, that way of aggressively rejecting something
that puts them off balance in order to distance themselves from it.

I dont know if it helps but sometimes when someone responds to me like that I kinda
feel that the person has something going on inside, some kind of conflict, and so maybe
its not really me they are trying to get at and it stings a little less.

Given time, im sure they will realise their mistake and apologise, if not then like others
have said they are not the kind of person you need to be around anyway.

Best of luck with your course!