hi

[jojo69]

hi guys :)
Im new to this site and would just like to share a few of my troubles:weep: i have this very BIG fear of dying and its driving me insane, through the day im not so bad but just before i try and sleep at night it builds up and makes me jumpy and nervy and very very scared. Ive had anxiety and depression since i was a little girl ive had mostly all the anti depressants there is on the market, and as im getting older its getting worse my main fear is cancer which i worry about on a daily basis my dad died with this and my gran, and my father in law all very recently i think all this worry is stopping me enjoying life to the full ive been to see a councillor twice but she isnt telling me anything that i dont know....... i could probably be a councillor with all my knowledge of health anxiety lol , i just have trouble controlling my thoughts from the negative to the positive. does anyone else feel this way?
thanks
jojo x:)

[miss sparkle]

hiya.
i always have this fear constantly in my mind. i would say i have always been aware that i was more negative than my friends and family, but it has came to a head recently as i have also had a few family deaths happen quite close together and quite suddenly.
i hate how i feel, and wish i could just relax and enjoy life as my anxiety gets the better of me more often than not recently, like you say particularly at night time xxx you are not alone with there feelings!

[jojo69]

hiya.
as im relaxing and winding down for the day the only thing i can think about is dying its like i imagine life going on without me in it and it terrifies me i know that everyone eventually has to die but i wanna live to a good old age x

[miss sparkle]

oh i defiantly know how you feel. i imagine my illness, my death, my funeral, how my family will cope, the lot. Its sick really, i hate it. i am actually quite a fun, humorous person honest!
all the horrible thoughts in turn create the anxiety, which create the symptoms and so it starts again!
I always fall asleep with the tv on now, so i am half listening to something else, i find this helps me bit xxx

[jojo69]

i like to read this mostly helps me get to sleep but its amazing how the human brain can imagine things i see words on the page like cancer and then when i look again it was something completley different sometimes i think i need a really good shake and put all my energy into sorting my head out lol:D

[miss sparkle]

lol. well if you find something that sufficiently shakes you up enough to make a difference, be sure to let me know! :-)