really upset

[joanne30]

I have had anxiety for twenty years. It's a consant struggle. I find very difficult to make friends, due to a lack of self confidence. I have tried to make contact with someone who lives close to me. I know that I have been over the top in contacting her,as this person has sent me a message to stop contacting her. This has really upset me, because I'd already decided today to stop the contact with this person. They sent their message this evening. There's no point in trying to be friends with someone who doesn't want to be friends. That's what I've decided.
But I'm upset because it was a shock to get, and I've been in tears all night, and I've can't eat or drink anything, which is very serious for me because I have great difficulty swallowing liquids due to a severe choking phobia.

I do take everything to heart, because I'm too sensitive.

Sorry for this post

joanne30

[Haybee]

i'm sorry to hear you've had such a rough day :( maybe you havent been MASSIVELY over the top in contacting her, maybe she just decided to kind of nip it in the bud, so to speak, before you got the wrong idea, so i wouldnt worry about the embarassment factor too much if you can help it. friendships come and go and as you had already decided she wasnt worth all the effort, theres no harm done either way :) i'm sure there are plenty of people out there who are/would be glad to be your friend. im going offline now but if you're feeling lonely or like you want to talk to someone, the chatroom is really good :) or you can pm me sometime if you like!

[theharvestmouse]

Was this person a friend? Why did they ask you to stop contacting them?

[Lucyg]

Be strong, it's their loss. I have always struggled with friendships haven't got anybody that I would say is a close friend. I decided to focus on my family and getting myself better. I know it's hard but focus on yourself. Good luck:)

[macc noodle]

Hi hon, was it someone from NMP?

If so, you need to take into account that we are all here for different reasons and sometimes we much prefer the anonymity that being here gives. It allows us to be honest about our problems without there being a face to the name if you see what I mean.

I would not get upset - just keep on coming here - chat is useful you know - it often gives me that little boost when I am feeling low.

Chin up :hugs:

[joanne30]

Thank you for your kind posts, I've decided to stop trying to make friends on anxiety forums, because this person has really upset me, and I don't want to be rejected again
I've always found it difficult making friends, since being bullied at school.

My anxiety is really high. I didn't sleep last night, because I had really bad palpitations due to this person.

joanne30.

[macc noodle]

Thank you for your kind posts, I've decided to stop trying to make friends on anxiety forums, because this person has really upset me, and I don't want to be rejected again
I've always found it difficult making friends, since being bullied at school.

My anxiety is really high. I didn't sleep last night, because I had really bad palpitations due to this person.

joanne30.

No Joanne you had bad palpitations because you let yourself get this way - nothing at all to do with the other person who had the perfect right to choose whether or not to speak to you.

I do not wish to sound harsh but, as an anxeity sufferer myself, I know now that I have to be responsible for my own well being and if that means not letting people get me that upset then that is what I have to do. You need to do the same if you can.

As I said before we all come here because we have our own issues and sometimes people speak before they think about how much the other person may take what is being said and how it may come across.

Please do not waste another moment getting upset by it all - it is her loss not yours.

Are you getting any therapy for your problems?

I live locally to you I think and I have had excellent GP and CBT support to get me through - maybe you need some extra help too.

:hugs::hugs:

[cheryl foster]

if they can be that cold to you..they were never meant to be..their loss...sounds like they have issues..not you.:winks:

[theharvestmouse]

It sounds like this person has a problem, and I would not get upset over what has happened, they don't sound worth it anyway. Her loss not yours.:)

[joanne30]

My local pysch team have signed me off, saying I don't want to be helped.

I have a severe choking phobia, which none of the team has a clue how to treat. I've cbt which didn't help at all.

joanne30.

[joanne30]

Hi everyone, thank you very much for all your kindness. I'm feeling a lot happier now, no more tears. Like you all said I need to think about myself. It's her loss not mine. You have all shown me more compassion than she ever has.
I think I need to toughen up a bit, and stop being so sensitive.

Thank you again

joanne30

[MidnightCalm]

Glad to see you are feeling better, some people can be harsh when really all you wanted was a friend.
Is the person on this forum then? Won't they see this...?

[joanne30]

Yes, the person is on this forum. I don't think she cares about my feelings, if she can be so cold towards me. I hope that she has seen my post and all your replies. Hopefully she'll think about how she'll treat people in the future, if she wants to make any friends.
I'm trying not to dwell on it any more, but it's difficult not to, when you've been rejected again.
This is like when I was bullied at school by some girls that were supposedly friends of mine.

joanne30.