So many different symptoms

[Ditapage]

Anxiety is destroying me, basically. I hate to be dramatic, negative, and everything else I've been called by people who could just never understand it without having it, but anxiety is consuming me. I'm here to ask desperately if anyone else experiences these symptoms, some of which I can't even explain which makes me that much more anxious because I feel like I'll never get answers.


I have only once experienced a racing heart. Every other time my panicking begins with a sensation in my head of fullness. When it gets bad enough it feels like my head will burst and at the same time it reaches it peak, there's a weird feeling in my stomach like the first drop on a rollercoaster. It makes me want to scream for help, but it has happened 100 times now since it started about 8 months ago, and I never have. It's accompanied by labored breathing (or a split second feeling that I've completely lost my breath) and sometimes its accompanied by the feeling of wanting to go to the toilet.

There is NIL pain. My neck just feels like it can't support my head, it feels so tight or something, and the tightness is in my face, nose, and forehead, too, and i can't focus and it feels I'm going to faint. I can't believe someone talking to me can't see it... or maybe they can. If i look too hard at someone, my vision gets blurry and my head feels like it'll blow. At its peak, the head bursting feeling is unexplainable, uncomfortable, and scary. I don't just think I'll pass out, I think I'll black out and die. It makes me really panicked and sometimes the shaking starts, too. It's worsened when i start thinking about how much i don't want to faint and concern the people around me, or when i'm in a place i can't get out of quick enough. So i know there's a psychological thing to it, too.


The other thing is i first started having symptoms sitting at the computer for my job. The pain in my neck is where i lean forward at the computer, so i dunno if it could actually be a neck issue. I'm also a chronic mouth breather, i have to consciously shut my mouth and breathe through my nose.


It definitely FEELS like I'm panicking, because i can't even sit down and calmly have a glass of water and breathe. I have to keep pacing up and down, which is odd considering feeling faint means you should lay down, but when i lay down, i feel like i'm sinking, or something and i have to shoot upright. Is this typical anxiety? That was the diagnosis but I just need some reassurance that my symptoms sound like panic, and other anxiety sufferers can relate. Thanks. :)

[jca]

I can relate. It is definitely panic/anxiety. I used to get that feeling of fullness all the time; I felt like if I didn't "let it out", I would die. I ended up starting to self harm in order to open myself up so that it would come out and not kill me. My stomach would feel so full and I would urgently feel like I need to let it out one way or the other. I would pray "just vomit just vomit" because I didn't want to mess my pants in public. I won't go into detail about the self harm because I don't think sharing that is helpful at all. But for a while, it was the only thing that would help. Eventually, I developed a numbness and my ocd became more hardcore and I never panicked again. I do things like avoid public places when they're busy, not take left turns when driving, and not have any friends.... these things keep me on a non anxious level. But that isn't healthy. As people, we need friends. We especially need people to understand us. You are not alone. I just hope you can find a safe way to curve or cure the anxiety.

Panic, for me, felt/feels like I need to get out of my own skin. Or, like I'm going to come out of my skin and don't want to. I can't keep it in and I can't get it out. Usually it's a control issue. A crowd, or a busy street. When I can tell that my safety or well being is in the hands of anyone other than myself, I panic.

And I hope you don't feel like you are being "dramatic" or "negative" when you talk about how you feel. Even if someone has told you that it is that way, or if you feel guilty for feeling the way you do... it isn't bad. Nothing you feel is wrong or bad. People fear/hate what they don't understand. But we can't hold that against people, either. We have to inspire and show each other. All we can do is try.