Is it just Me?

[Forest]

Hi,

Why is it when you look around you at the general public everyone looks like that they have no troubles at all but a lot of people on this site me included seem to be suffering from anxiety on a daily basis. We all have different forms of Anxiety but like I say everyone else seems to be coping with everyday live without the constant worries and Problems we Have. It just makes you think am I the only one that has worries Obviously not as this site shows but why does it happen to certain people. And also it makes you think what is normal behaviour for some people and why can I not be like that. (Live and let Live) sort of thing.

[ShazyA]

Forest to the outside world I look like a strong independent female. which I am to extent. But I suffer with anxiety, panic attacks and cant go out unless my hubby comes with me and holds my hand.
And ts probably no different for people we pass every day, not that they all suffer with mental illness but they must have worries and problems and unseen illnesses ect. Dont judge a book= what you see is not always what you get. lol

[Forest]

Shazya.
Thats the same as me Got a good job ,fantastic family and am very much up for a laugh and a joke with my mates and work Mates, But I have a problem just like most people on here and I beleive if I told any of my mates they would prob think I was being Daft about things.

[ShazyA]

I didnt tell anyone for years about my problems and Im still careful about who knows, its really only close family and 2 good friends mainly because I see it as a weakness (only in myself not others)
do you think your friends would see you as weak if you told them? do you not have a good friend you trust and could confide in?

[littleredhen]

Hi Forest.

No it is not just you!

I agree with ShazyA and identify with both of you.

I am like Shazya - people look at me and think - hey what a great life and she's strong and can cope with anything. What they don't realise is that inside I am dying and it's a massive struggle to put on the act that I do. It's utterly exhausting and often at the end of the day (after looking to the rest of the world that I am having a great time) all I am fit for is crawling in bed and weeping. As Shazya says - appearances can be deceptive.

I am constantly agog at how some people carry on with apparently worrying about a thing - especially those people that hurt others without seeming to care.

[Stormsky]

remember before anx, we were those people walking around , living life, seemingly without a care!
its because we cant now cope, that we wonder how they do!
But also like said, im sure lots of those people are hiding hidden worries etc, they may well have anx like us, but we dont show it when we are out....you cant tell who does and who doesnt have any type of illness just by walking past people!

[Bill]

why does it happen to certain people.

If you talked to everyone you met, I would bet they would all say they suffer from something ranging minor to major ailments but unless you asked, you may never have realised. The same is true with worries. We all worries; it's just that with us, we focus on fears and worries while others are able to put them to one side or simply don't care but I feel in actual fact anxiety in some form or another can affect absolutely anyone because we all have our own thresholds and when they're exceeded, that's when the mind reacts by saying it's too much to cope with. It can be a build-up causing overload or just as easily a one-off trigger.

For instance, there's the general worrier like me who will always find something to worry about but there are those who have specific fears and phobias. Also though there are those who have experienced war, traumatic events in their lives or terrible experiences that leave them unable to cope with day to day living but you would never know because it can't be seen and people are very good at hiding feelings. I heard once that men suffer as much as women; the difference being women feel able to talk but men feel they have to keep it a secret.

I believe that everyone suffers from something and anxiety is what we've been dealt to learn to cope with.

A little story for you - I had been working for 5 years when I started getting suicidal thoughts, panic and feelings of wanting to escape but I told no one until one day after a meeting, my boss turned to me and asked "Where was I?" My mind was so overwhelmed with worries during the meeting, I just couldn't concentrate so I felt unable to contribute. I had reached the stage where how I felt had become visible so I felt I had to tell my boss what happened at the meeting. When I told her how I had been feeling and the reasons why different pressures at work and at home had become too much, she became tearful and said she had no idea what I had been going through. When others I knew also found out, they said to me I always appeared so confident and laid back but it was all just a masquerade hiding how I really felt.

Someone once said to me we all have masks in public but only become ourselves when we're home alone. I don't know if that's true or not but I do know it's true of me.:hugs: