GAD or OCD?

[Gopala]

Hi everyone

Around 4 months ago i started obsessively worrying if my kids may have seen "porn" online as there was a problem with the internet filter we have. There has never been any evidence to suggest they saw anything, rather i just thought "what if" and it escalated from there. I started feeling im a terrible parent and lot's of guilt and then a new "worry" came - what if i would hurt them? This is total nonsense as i love my kids more than anything and wouldnt hurt a fly - this is true i catch them and put them outside lol. I started obsessing all the "what ifs" and started having terrible anxiety attacks which got so bad i have started taking citalopram 20 mg and mitrazapine 15mg. Its been about 2 weeks on the meds and i can feel it easing off for sure but still im worried about my weird thoughts. I am on the waiting list for CBT but it could be a few months and have read 2 very good books "Brainlock" and "At last a life". Brainlock suggests i may have OCD says its a brain issue but "at last a life" suggests its all because of anxiety. As this all seems to have started when i started "obsessing" over one thing i would think its maybe GAD? What do you think? Thanks :)

[GT]

It really sounds like GAD to me or just run of the mill anxiety. People with anxiety have the same thoughts as everyone else. Your worries are not extreme they are very normal. Just for anx people they stick to our brains like glue. My therapist said anx people do a thing called scanning. We feel anx so our minds search and search for threats real or made up just to justify the terrible feeling. Its completely normal just we are highly tuned into our thoughts. It's anx can seem like OCD as we are obsessed with our thoughts. But they are all one of the same thing. Try to get some talking therapy it really helps. Do you really need a label for it? Just remember its your mind trying to justify your physical anx feelings. x x Good luck

[Gopala]

Thanks so much GT - regarding your question do i need a label for it? I guess im just looking, searching for a way out of it and trying to find out what and wht this is happening to me. It has turned my life upside down - i never new what anxiety was like until this stuff hit me. I really do feel for everyone suffering from the various forms out there. Thanks again :)

[rock chick]

Well I'd say GAD, I have both and the thing to remember about OCD is the compulsion part, obsessing but without the former doesn't fit the bill. Either way CBT sounds like a really good way to go for either (for most anxiety disorders actually) and so are the antidepressants.

I also understand a need for a label, well I don't really see as wanting to label something but when we know we have something specific it can make us feel, yes this is what it is and can study it and all that. It depends on the person I suppose but with all the things I have it needn't matter much anymore because anxiety is the root of it all, even OCD (not saying that it doesn't have something to do with the brain, just that it's an anxiety disorder after all). At the end of the day it's how you cope with it that matters rather than what name is has.

Anyway I really hope the CBT goes well and glad to hear the citalopram & mitrazapine are helping! You're far from alone, remember that as well as you can get through this if you work at it and understand it.:bighug1:

One other thing, I don't feel you're gonna harm your kids, try and believe that even when the obsessions about it come. You know yourself and thoughts don't equal actions or even desires.