Not good at atll

[marie ross]

Hi everyone,

Anyone felt like they've just had it with panic and anxiety. I've just had to ring my partner and sister because i went to pick my daughter up from music club and could'nt cope with waiting outside, so i had to speak to someone. I've got even worse now, every day is a constant struggle, i'm taking taxis to work every day, and i've told the kids i don't know if i can pick them up from school any more - it terrifies me. The feelings of panic are just to overwhelming now, and i just can't cope anymore.

I've just rang the doctors because i'm so scared and i think its the time for me to start trying to take medication (something i said i'd never do)

But the only doctor i can see, is the one that first told me that a young girl like me should'nt be having any of my problems (nice hey!!), i'm going to have to see her but i just don't want her to fob me off again. I'm in tears now, i feel so helpless, i'm waiting for my partner to come home, i just feel lonely and depressed.

I've tried so hard to beat this, but it looks like at long last its beaten me.

Any kind words please, they would be so much appreciated at the moment. Sorry this is a long post, but i had to get it off my chest. Cheers.

Take care.

Marie XXX

[Dave777]

Hi Marie
Hang on in there, unless you are very young medication would help you.
I have needed it on a couple of occasions, it's there to help while you sort your problems out. Keep chatting to people and have some fun, that's the best way to make life brighter ...... just have a laugh and a joke with a few nice people.

take care
Dave

[mirry]

ooooo Marie its so horrible suffering like this,
You seem like a really sensible person trying to avoid the pills but sometimes we need to except help in any way possible.

I too have issues with school runs, its not easy facing it day after day but please please dont stop doing it.Avoidance just makes your world get smaller and smaller.

As for your doctor, I would demand to see another doctor.....what a stupid comment she made ! As we know this problem effects all ages and she of all people should know that.

Marie also ask the GP for CBT, I am currently doing CBT and its very good. I have to practise mindfulness daily and it has been the best thing.

I am going away tommorow until sunday but if you need to chat you can pm me anytime because your post sounded just like me with my problems....you are not alone xxx

mirryx

[Two heads]

hi marie!
Sorry your feeling so bad with this horrible anxiety hun,i known its so cr..p and hard to deal with.We are all here for you to chat any time.
Maybe it is the right time to try meds.I am on citalopram and have just moved up to 20mg and find they do help a little.They help you to cope with this anxiety that bit easyier.You must do what you feel not what doc feels, as its you that is going away suffering not her.You can not control the chemicals in your brain hun,only meds can do that!
Those feeling of panick are just so scary and they do try to take over your life.Try not to fight that wave when it comes over as it only makes it worse.I had panick on sat night when i was in london and i just let the wave do its worse.I hadet had it for along time befor sat .so i got really fed up on monday and upped my meds to 20mg.But meds were working entill then hun.I hope this helps xxxx

[carlin]

Oh dear, what a horrible time eh? Yes, at times it feels lke it will beat us and it is an uphill struggle, but we won't give up! If you are offered medication and you feel ok about it, try it and see if it helps short term.You sound a very caring a sensible mum to me and your partner seems to understand. All those things are in your favour, take as much time, as humanly possible, to look out for yourself for a change, I know that isn't easy with children though! Before you visit your gp, maybe write down the things you want to ask, forget what was said the first time, maybe she was having anxious day! You will and can get through this, you have before, take things slowly. As for the school run, is there anyone who you could call to pick the kids up if really necessary, I always used to think a back-up plan helped me a little. keep in touch. x

[polly daydream]

Hi Marie, I have suffered anxiety for 2.5 yrs now and have only just started meds, I tried really hard to overcome it by myself but in the end had to give in, as I was not getting any better. Just to say really, you defo are not alone, we do unfortunately need extra help sometimes, like Two heads has said, the doc hasn't got to go home and deal with it, so go get some meds.

Let us know how you get on.
Best wishes,

Polly

[marie ross]

Thanks everyone for your quick replies, i really do need help at this moment. I'm still crying now, and am finding it really hard to breathe. I've been trying to deal with this now for 2 years, and until now have accepted it and gone along with it.

But these last few weeks, the panics come back big time, and i don't know how to deal with it anymore. The kids are waiting for their tea and i can't even face going up to the shop at the top of the road!! My legs are like jelly, home used to be my safe place, but now i'm here panicking really badly and i've never ever been like this at home.

I will definately be going to the doctors, i have to, just confused about what meds would be best for me.

Thanks again for all your kind words.

Take care.

Marie XXX

[clickaway]

Marie,

I really do know what you are going through. I have been rough lately and often without energy.

But the thing is that this is just a phase. Good idea going to the doctors and she will probably calm you and give relief at least.

I often find it is good to talk at times like this, but even then that is sometimes difficult.

Hugs to you.



Ray
http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[marie ross]

Thank you Ray,

I have kept it to myself how bad i've been feeling, hoping that it would just go away, but no its reared its big fat ugly head and come to haunt me again. I find it difficult to tell people how i'm really feeling, i just plant a smile on my face and tell everyone 'i'm fine'!!!! Not this time, i have to tell people and have to accept help, i'm just not as strong as i thought i was.

Take care of yourself Ray, and i really hope that you're feeling lots better soon.

Thanks to everyone else who has helped me with their kind words, i'm feeling slightly better now, and able to cope a bit more.

Take care.

Marie XXX

[Two heads]

Sounds like you do need alittle help marie so dont be afraid to ask.Have a look on the medication forium to see what meds are available.There are loads but there are afew of the most common ones on there!Get your kids to bed and try to relax your selfxxx

[Breatheon]

Sorry that you are feeling this way. Please do go and see the doctor - preferably one with a more caring manner! - and get some medication. There are lots of options available and you don't have to suffer with all these horrible symptoms. And always remember you are not alone, we all know what you are going through.

Take care

Chris

[chucklehound]

Sorry you are feeling this way but I hope things pick up for you soon:D

Take care

Chuckle

xxxx

[carol1969]

I read what you said and a tear came down my cheek, i totally understand where you are coming from. The last six years i have just existed not lived. Everytime i tried going out i came home in tears because of the panic. I went to the pictures with my two sisters once and had to leave 10 mins in to the film only to go home and break my heart because i just wanted to be normal. I want to enjoy my life with my kids and family. I went to the doctors last week again and i have gone on medication (cipramil) because i need a break from the panic and anxiety, its so exhausting. Marie i think you should go on medication, i already feel alot calmer and i have only been taking the tabs a week. There is side effects at first but they go after a few days and it is so worth it (not everyone gets side effects).
I hope you have a good future and you can beat this even with meds.
love carol x

[emma chant]

HI Marie,
Hope your feeling better,
TAKE CARE AND THINK POSSITIVE.
With love and hugs xxx

e chant

[ceecee]

hi marie hope you are feeling a little better now.i know that anxiety does reacha peak and you think to yourself that you can,t go on but you will be o.k!this is just a blip and although you feel pretty c**p at the moment you will get over this!i have got lots of diffirent meds from the doctors,but never taken them though sometimes i wish i had!it is difficult especially when you have kids and they want you to take them here,there and everywhere but i sometimes think if i didn,t have my children i wouldn,t do anything cause i,d stay in my comfort zone.you have done really well to live with anxiety for 2 years and you will get there this is just a bump in the road to your recovery.take care thinking of you rachelx x x

[marie ross]

Thank you all for taking the time to listen and reply to me, its really appreciated.

Have been on the settee for hours now, kids went to bed hours ago, they did'nt even play me up tonight, so they know somethings not right with mum!!!!

Feeling much better now thanks to everyones help here. Dreading the morning, school run and work, but i'll cross that bridge in the morning.

Cheers everyone. Take care.

Marie XXX

[hayles]

You have not been beaten, its just taking to much energy from you.
Maybe it is time you accepted a little help from meds. I had to face that fact 6 months ago and i have come along in leaps and bounds and have reduced my mediaction by 3/4 so i am nearly off it!!!!!

It may help and its not forever.....

keep your chin up, things can only get better.

Big Hugs for you xxxx

Hay x

[Two heads]

How are you today marie?I do hope you are not feeling to bad sweetxxxxxx

[marie ross]

Thank you,

Managed to get to work, but by the time i went to pick the kids up from school - back to square one.

I've just had to go back up to school again to take the kids to their school fete, and i managed to walk in there, but i have never felt so terrible in all my life. Luckily they are old enough to stay on there own and i can pick them up in a couple of hours (they don't want me hanging around anyway!!!!)

Still feeling like c**p, and am constantly feeling dizzy and breathless. I've been looking around the medication site and am wetting myself about going onto meds, they look horrific, and a lot of people seem to get worse when starting them and just finish taking them.

Just at the moment it feels like i'm destined to feel this way forever. Feeling really really sorry for myself!!!! Sorry.

Thank for asking how i am, not good !!!!!

Take care.

Marie XXXX

[Louisey]

Hi Marie,

My heart goes out to you so much, living with the strain of ever looming anxiety is so draining and depressing. You are so very brave for every day that you battle on, as it's such a terrible, lonely battle.

I do know that combined therapy/drugs is meant to be one of the most effective ways of treatment. I've decided if my problem escalates to be really bad again - when I can't catch a train, bus, get in a car, sit through a meeting - I am going to give it a try. Maybe you could talk to your GP or ring one of the NHS advice lines about how it all works?

Louisey x