always expecting the worst/irrational thoughts

[shadowlight]

does anyone else get this? For example my partner is currently visiting his dad, and earlier I couldn' get in touch with him for about 4 hours. At first I just thought "it's fine he'll have no signal or his phone will be playing up", then after about an hour the anxiety started, the increased heart-rate, the fear, the inability to focus on anything else, then the irrational thoughts "he's not comeing back", "he hates you", "he's better off without you", "you're too fat to be with him", etc. Then came the "he's dead" fears...


seriously I can't control this sequence of events, and it's damaging my relationship.


Does anyone else get this? Is there anything that helps?

[GT]

Yeah i get this. Mine can even be triggered by one word on the TV. Its just your mind running away with you. Remember thoughts are worthless. x

[AnxiousAnnie18]

I get this, not often anymore but when I was going through health anxiety I would think like this everyday. I think it's another nasty symptom of anxiety unfortunately :(

[sickandtired]

i got this last year after my mum had a seizure....it seemed to trigger the most awful doom and gloom thoughts,which eventually led to some sort of breakdown.most of my worries are about my kids,mum,hubby and sometimes my own health.the irrational thoughts are pretty frightening too,as i even envisage the funeral.....the grief etc....it is horrible,but relentless....
but somehow,with the help of talking to my close friends and family,a phsychologist and meds,relaxation,stopping watching the awful news (which always triggered a disaster for me) and getting plenty of sleep,ive finally come out the other side
meds arent for everyone,but i think they have been a big help and have lifted me out of that dreadful depressive state,id been in for so long and i havent had a panic attack since xmas xx

[Munki]

Wow YES! Intrusive thoughts. I get them terribly.

Many years ago I had to stop things like reading magazines and watching certain TV programmes as I started believing I was ugly. That was when it started but it happens at various other times still, mainly when I'm pre menstrual!

Please know that it's very normal firstly but secondly, maybe, when you have something occurring that you recognise as a potential trigger, read 'Mindfulness for Dummies'...
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Mindfulness-For-Dummies-Book-CD/dp/0470660864

It fills the time as well as nurtutring your methods of thinking. Good luck xxxx

[Littlemadam]

It's sad but in a way so good to see so many people with exactly the same feelings and horrible nightmares that I too suffer.

It is like a snowball effect, first you can dismiss the thoughts, then the feeling of dread that something bad has happened, then you are never going to hear from that person because they never wanted to be with you etc etc......

I have had so many panic attacks as have been convinced loved ones are dead etc etc.

Have you spoken to your other half about how you have been feeling recently and what triggers you? I did that as was terrified of pushing him away and it did a world of good. My CBT has taught me to take a step back, and either tell him I know what I'm doing and pushing him away, so will stop now as I don't mean it. Or if that fails, say to him that I need 5 minutes, and will call or come back to him when I feel a bit better.

Communication is key when trying to help the other half understand the way you feel. And also, realising all these times you've panicked what bad has actually happened. Argue in your head and dispute your irrational thoughts until they go back down if you can xxxx

[shadowlight]

thankyou for the replies.


I have only just started CBT (I used to have CAT and then had a very long therapy break) so guess may learn some ways to help with this.

I have heard of mindfulness, but I have zero money right now so will look into that once finances are sorted

[emsie]

Hi, type in dbt self help into google and you will get some free websites up that offer a section on mindfulness. It's basically about being in the here and now so taking time to breathe and telling yourself these thoughts are not fact etc. It is good so worth giving it a try!