AnxiousEmma
06-04-12, 13:01
Hello. I'm new to this forum, My name is Emma-Jane and I am 18 years old. I searched for a forum to talk to others with anxiety and self-esteem issues and I found this forum. I don't really know where to begin, searching through some of the posts I know my problems are not as bad as some people's but I just want someone to talk too because no one in my life really understands. I have always had low self esteem to start with - being bullied from the age of 9 till 15 it really effected my confidence. I was very good at manipulating the people around me into believing that I didn't have low self esteem, there is a fine line between low self esteem and being an 'attention seeker' and I think I created the impression that I was an attention seeker for some reason - I was that good at pretending I guess.. Anyway, I can keep it under control most of the time and even though i don't feel good about myself I can get on with life - pretending! I have good days and bad days... I had my first panic attack about a year ago, when I was in college. I was really stressed out about the essay I had due in and I was worried about it. When I was sat in the dance studio early in the morning I started to feel really weird and lightheaded, I wasn't talking about the fact I was stressed, I guess I was thinking about it. All of a sudden i couldn't breathe and it terrified me, I started to have a panic attack and my friends couldn't calm me down. Even though I have had a few since then, that was the worst one. Ever since then I'm worried every time I get stressed it will happen again! When i started University, I was worried about the stress levels and I thought it was going to happen again, and it did. I've had about 4 all together and even though they're not in any sort of pattern, I'm worried when the next one will arise. I went to the doctors about the chest pains I was having and she just said, you have anxiety and told me to go to a counsellor. I went the once, but didn't really think it helped at all. I also have Apiphobia, I'm terrified of bees and don't like going out in the summer. Sorry for the long introduction but I needed to get it all off my chest. I'm hoping to get some help here and make some new friends :)
Emma-Jane :)
Emma-Jane :)