So unhappy

[Sal_2k6]

maybe someday ill be able to say im happy
to have a smile on my face to be free
maybe im destined to be unhappy
maybe everyone understands how i feel
i doubt it
i cant help myself i need help
drowning in an endless downpour of feelings
of bieng unwanted and dispised
trying to breakthrough something that isnt real
trying just to be myself
and lossing the never ending battle to maybe someday be happy
i dont undrstand it
i cant talk about my feelings to anyone
i work things ou in my own head and tell myself its my fault
beacouse it feels like it is
when my mother is ranting on about things i cant help but feel guilty
and say sorry its just what i do and how i feel
i cant remeber the last time i was truely happy
makes it worse my aunt and cousin are comming up next month
when my mother has an operation i dont know if i can cope
with it i hate them i hate every person realy beacouse
we all judge people by the way they look and are nasty
i hate it it feels as though there eyes are burning through you
and beacouse of that i am scared to leave the house
i want to go out but im not able to
i feel so unhappy i just want to die and then it will be all over
but i dont want to die dont be thinking im suicidle
i could never do such a thing i just feel so deflated and i dont know what to do
theres nowhere to turn im stuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sally

[skye338]

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))



Accept the things you cannot change and have courage to change the things you can.

[carol1969]

Its horrible looking at the same four walls everyday and thinking is this it! Make yourself go out just down the street and back everyday until you can go a bit further. The only person that can help you is yourself. I have learnt this and at least go to the shop everyday. It is hard when you are anxious but take small steps and you will get better believe me.
I hope things get better for you in the future and you are able to enjoy life again.
Carol x

If you have peace of mind you have everything