Health Anxiety & Medical Phobia

[constantworrier]

Hi All,

Surely, since i have health anxiety, i should be able to cope with and welcome tests/ investigations etc...to put my mind at ease whenever i have a health concern.
Although I've had a fair few tests done over the years, i'm still really scared of all things medical...especially tests. It's not just having them done that worries me, it's also the waiting for the results, when i busy myself catastrophising, and jump whenever the phone rings, convinced it's the doctor with awful news.
So, i get a worry about a particular illness and go to my doctor for reassurance. But, if the doctor can't give a diagnosis there and then, i can't face the unavoidable wait following investigations to get a diagnosis. This leaves me in limbo and trapped with the current worry (unless i go through the tests and the associated worry and fear)...not much of a choice really! Is it possible to have a medical phobia as well as health anxiety? Can anybody relate to this [?]

CW xx

"Instead of seeing the rug being pulled from under us, we could learn to dance on a moving carpet." - Anon

[Daisybun]

Hi I can relate a little to this. I like to be reassured there and then, but i have been through the tests, but i get very worked up and worry constantly about results. After they've been done and I'm all clear I relax for a while until the next thing!

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[Wonderwoman]

Hi Red Devil,

Yes I can relate...................I want the reassurance but can't bear the wait.............it is fear, a whole lot of "what iffing"............and zero patience.

I have been really good and not been to a Doctor for 6 months now............I have had that many tests that have come back normal and felt so embarrassed everytime I walked into the Doctor's office (the cleaner used to call me by name) that I made a decision not to waste any more time and money and more importantly not give my sensations any credit whatsoever and therefore disempower my anxiety.

How have I done this you ask?? Well it hasn't been easy and I have put a lot of faith in my patient Husband - I say to him "if you were really concerned about me or thought there was something seriously wrong with me you would rush me to Hospital wouldn't you?" and he says of course I would". So now every time I get a sensation (new or familiar) I tell myself to wait and see if it is still there in an hour/a few days or a week etc and then I distract myself............depending on the persistance and severity of the symptom I will call on my Husband for reassurance and that combination works - the sensation disappears - not always straight away and it always leaves something else in its place but with this type of reasoning I have made real progress. I still get really scared and I still have very high anxiety but I am trying to expose this horrible disorder for what it really is - a liar!

I intend to visit the Doctor again before the year is up - but not with anxiety symptoms just for an annual checkup.....and by then I hope it will be as routine for me as it is for a normal person.

Hope this helps.

Sharon

[Barb]

Hi CW

I can certainly relate, I have health anxiety, especially fear of heart attack or stroke and cant get any help as wont go near a doctor, hospital or anything medical like optician, dentist. The only time I see a doctor is if I have to have one out, then I have a major panick attack. I dont know how it started really I used to be okay we I first started having panics and anxiety, and as for tests I just wont have them, as I would rather not know. How stupid is that ? I really envy people that can go and get symptoms checked out. The last time I had to go to the doctors I made a complete fool of myself and my blood pressure was so high he asked me if I was still alive!!!!!

Barb xxx

[polly daydream]

Hi CW, I can defo relate to this, I have terrible white coat syndrome, I go to the docs with a problem then panic when having the tests and waiting on results. I recently had heart tests and ended up panicking the whole way through and even had to take a beta blocker which really probably mucked everything up. I even had to ask the doc to stop one of the tests as I was having a panic attack.

Best wishes,

Polly

[manmoor]

Hi Cw,

I can relate to every word you say and sympathise with you completely. I blame it on my health anxiety. I want to know whats wrong but at the same time Im scared in case its something serious. Im going through a bad time myself at the moment and my health anxiety is sky high.

Hope You Feel Better Soonx

We are all here for each other

Take Care

Mandy

xx

[brenda]

HI CW
I'm the same as Barb. Cant cope with going for tests most of the time, get anxious waiting for results and dont go to the doctor if I can help it
I was supposed to go for tests recently but couldnt go.
Went back to the doc and was sooo bad just seeing him about my stress

So you are not the only one :-)

Pam x

[constantworrier]

Hi
Daisybun - like you, when i get the all-clear, i relax, though this is only temporary, till the next thing comes along...either another "illness", or concern that something may have been "missed" by the tests.
Thanks for the tip Sharon...good idea to observe somebody else's reactions....i sometimes get so consumed by the bodily sensations, that i don't consider that others may not be as alarmed as i am...and if they were concerned, like you say, they would react accordingly. I do find that distraction is useful...if i am busy, i hardly ever have many symptoms. Something serious would persist and probably invade distracted periods regardless? Sounds like you are making real progress. Well done!
I completely empathise with you Barb and you too, Pam,about rather not knowing..I feel the same and I think that it's probably a natural defense mechanism to avoid anything which scares us so much.
Polly, i panic just like you...so much so that if i'm having blood taken, my veins constrict so much that they almost vanish...the nurse often ends up unable to find a vein in my arm and often has to go for the back of my hand instead. I'm not even scared of needles...i'm scared of the forthcoming results.
Mandy - like you say, it's an awful dilemma...needing the reassurance and having a way to get it in sight...yet too scared to reach out and get it. Thankyou for the good wishes..hope you feel better soon too.
Thanks to everyone for their replies on this. It is a comfort to know that i'm not alone in this rather ironic aspect of health anxiety. :D

CW xx


"Instead of seeing the rug being pulled from under us, we could learn to dance on a moving carpet." - Anon

[Wonderwoman]

Hi CW,

I am sorry I called you Red Devil by mistake.

I am living in Viet Nam at the moment and find the language barrier at the local Doctors and the $50 US a pop fee at the foreign Doctors a good deterrant. But rest assured I live very close to 3 hospitals (just in case) hahaha.

I just wish the Doctor could do every single test to rule out every possible thing and then give me a written report saying "all clear - it is just anxiety"...........but of course that is not possible. ...........all they can do are the basic tests - ECG, blood tests and a chest x-ray and try to put your mind at rest........which is great for a couple of days but then something else pops up....grrrrrrrrrr. I often say to my Husband "How do you sleep at night? - aren't you worried about what might be wrong with you?" and he says "No - I can't live my life whatiffing - you do that for both of us".........so again I always look to him for reassurance - ie if he isn't worried why should I be............easier said than done of course.

I hope my tips help.

Sharon

[Humly]

I can really relate to everything that has been said. If I have a symptom, I want to be told by the doctor there and then that there is nothing to worry about, that I am 100% ok. But that very rarely happens and instead of feeling relief I start worrying about tests I may have been referred for and what the results will be. The "what if" syndrome. In the past I have gone rushing down to the docs with fairly vague symptoms and have come away upset because they haven't been able to diagnose anything specific. I sometimes wish they would just say to me "Go away. There is nothing wrong with you". But of course they are too nice to do that.

Anyway, now instead of rushing to the docs straight away, I come on here and calm myself down and more often than not my smptoms don't seem quite so bad.

[kiss25]

hi i hope your feeling well today
i have suffered with this for 10 years now on and off . it only effects me when it gets triggered . if i get a headache its a tumour
if i get a bruise its meningacocill, if i cant swollow properly (which is all the time due to anxiety) its throat cancer , if i get intergestion or my arm feels funny its a heart attack.. the list goes on . its ocd.. its and obbsessive thought disorder .
i have jsut beaten yet another one of the many brains tumours i have had .. lol..
and i can assure you there is nothing wrong with you but i should say you need to stop going to the doctor . it makes it worse believe me . if you have had heaps of tests and they all come back normal then there is nothing to worry about . i no thats easier said then done .
i ahve found after a month long headache that drinking more water getting long deep tissue massages and doing alot of different eating that i feel alot better . if you have tried all these then medication is also available for ocd. i have been on it before and believe me you might not think a pill can stop thoughts like that but believe me it does .
it took me years to take the meds as i continuasly thought i would be allergic to them or something stupid like that if i swollwed them .. but they really do work
hope this helps :D

[julieG]

Good Lord Kiss

I think we were separated at birth! Identical thoughts - totally identical!

[lewis_k]

I have the same fear of tests. Not the tests really, but the waiting part. Luckily the doctor has been able to convince me without tests that I was fine in the past. I am now considering going to the doctor to bite the bullet and ask for as many tests as possible. I know the relief would be temporary but that's better than nothing! Now I am reconsidering a new doctor visit since you all seem to say that it only makes things worse in the long run.
I identify with your fear of medical tests! I fear waiting almost as much as the illness itself, since waiting is much more probable than an illness.
lewis

[strawberrie]

'waiting is much more probable than an illness', lewis i think you have hit the nail on the head there, i have had this problem so long i have lost sight of what i am actually scared of.

Although deep down my fear is finding out i have cancer, i have become really fearful of all the small steps it takes to get to that stage. I have the initial huge surge of fear when i find a new 'symptom', then the constant checking to see if its still there or changing, fear of calling the doctors to make an apointment, going in to see the doctor, seeing what the doctors reaction will be, fear of being told that i will need to go for tests, fear of waiting for the results etc. etc.

although i know that realistically the outcome is not likely to be cancer, it is quite likely i will have to go through at least some of these various steps, and i know how much distress they cause me, i honestly worry that the fear of going to hospital for tests will be so immense i might just disintegrate!

CW, i think that medical phobia is a major part of health anxiety even though it seems a bit strange. i find it very hard even visiting people in hospital, even the medical sounding names of the different departments, or seeing medical equipment, or sick people causes a huge sensation of fear in me. i can't really say anything that helps, just that you are not alone in your fear.

take care,
mag

[brink]

i am waiting for appointment at the hospital for test to sreen me for gland probs i was so anxious to check mail today could not wait or wife to come home with the key to mail box igot my hand traped how sad is that

ian brinkler

[constantworrier]

Hi All,
Thanks for the further replies.
LT, i completely understand the "what if" syndrome...it is very difficult to relax when your mind is racing and constantly coming up with a million and one disastrous outcomes. I do this regularly..i suppose it's maybe a way of trying to prepare for the worst, so it won't hit me as bad when it happens...it never does though.
Kiss25, your experience of health anxiety sounds very similar to mine. My triggers are either free-floating, (come out of the blue), or can be from seeing medical programmes on TV, reading articles etc...I have observed somebody with a broken leg before now and shortly after developed phantom sympathy pain and symptoms in response! Regular visists to the GP don't help in the long run i know...it just sets up a cycle of dependance on reassurement. It's just so hard to break when you are scared of missing something serious if you don't get it checked out. I'd have thought by now, i would have learned that many of my symptoms are not ominous after repeated reassurement. This seems to "short-circuit" that particular part of my brain though and the alarm returns again and again.
Lewis, the waiting is often the hardest part for me. The hypervigilence of being on guard continually for the next symptom is exhausting and demoralising. That in itself can cause as much stress as when you are dealing with symptoms.
Mag, thanks for the support. Now you mention it, like you, my health phobia isn't limited to test results...it's all the different steps leading up to and after it.
Ian, I completely understand your reactions while waiting for mail. If i'm waiting for test results. I spend the time with the phone clamped to me in case i miss a call with bad news. I jump out of my skin when the phone rings and have even intercepted the postman before now, before he gets to my address, just to save myself a few minutes unnecessary waiting! lol!
I suppose to summarise, we will always have bodily sensations and not all are indicative of illness; many are just due to benign processes. These are unnoticed by many people, though others have "noisy" bodies which are then continually analysed by an anxious mind. This sets up a chain of events: the body responds to the stress by pumping out adrenaline which triggers a whole new set of symptoms, the worry increases and so on and so on. It's a case of breaking the cycle before it gets too strong maybe. Easier said than done!
Thanks again to everybody for their posts. It helps to know I'm not alone in this and to hear others' experiences of this.

CW

xx

"Instead of seeing the rug being pulled from under us, we could learn to dance on a moving carpet." - Anon

[KevinM]

Wow everyone - reading these posts makes me beleieve we were all seperated at birth - all of you are experiancing the SAME thoughts and fears I have. I too run to the doctor for every little thing and I know I have to break this cycle. When I get sent to for tests, I badger the person performing the tests to either tip me off on what they are seeing or to put a rush on getting the results. I then badger the doctors office until the results come in. My family, while sympatheitic, think I have lost my mind - they just dont understand. I'm so sick of this worry, I'm hoping the counseling I've started and the meds I'm on will make a difference-this forum will help too.

KevinM

[Cathrin]

Hi CW
Im new on here tonight. Dont know where else to turn. A comfort to know that other people suffer from this health anxiety. I have had it for many years but it has really taken a hold over the last few weeks. Have had several investigations for dipstick blood in the urine and just had a CT scan of my kidneys/bladder etc recently, which is fine. Seem to get one thing cleared up then another starts. Never free. What is the answer? If we had a phobia of something we could avoid it would be easier, but a phobia about our own bodies is very disabling.

Cath