Hi -Does anyone have some time for a little advice

[AnotherNewYear]

I shall try and be brief !!

On and off for 21 yrs I have had panic disorder, HA and agoraphobia. I refused to take medication until 15 months ago (20mg Cit). On the medication i live a fairly normal life (work, go to uni and have a social life and can go into shops etc) - i do still occasionally get waves of panic in some situations but feel that with the help of cit i can mange them and haven't had a full blown attack for 15 months.

I have a review yesterday and the doctor suggested that i think about coming off the cit. He suggested that i go down to 10mg first and then come off completely. I am not sure i want to do this and am worried that i might find myself back to square one.

So my question is .... does anyone have any advice as to what to do ? or any experiences of coming off Cit ?Did the panic come back? and can the Doctor MAKE me do this ?

Ta in advance

[kestral]

in your text you said the gp suggested you should think about reducing your meds before coming off them but you are unsure. i would have further conversations with him as you have to be confident in what you want to do, its your choice.

[macc noodle]

Hey Debs

You are an articulate and confident young woman - so go into the Docs and tell him/her exactly how you feel and how nervous you are about coming off the Cit.

Personally, I would prefer not to rely on long term meds but that is just my particular mindset. I would certainly give the reduction idea a try - if it creates more panic, then you can tell the doc. that you want to stay on the 20mg Cit for a while longer and then ask him for some CBT to help you deal with thepanic etc in the longer term.

Good luck hun.

Macc Noodle
xxxxxxxxxxxx

[Jamesk]

Debs, you strike me as one of the most together and positive people I speak to, so firstly I hope it all works out for you and secondly I think you should have a candid discussion wioth your doctor regarding how bad things were before, home better better you feel now and be honest regarding your concerns re coming of the meds.

Whatever way it goes best of luck as you have certainly slapped some sense into me on a couple of occassions I needed sorting out! :flowers:

[AnotherNewYear]

Kes Macc and James thank you all for taking the time to reply !!

The doctor did give me another 2 months supply of 20mg and has asked me to think about reducing for the next review. I would love to come off meds completely (and I have had CBT Macc at the same time as starting the meds 15 months ago) - which i think has helped as much if not more then the meds.

Thank you all - i will give your comments and advice some thought - it is just so difficult as i cant stand the thought of going back to how i was - also i start a uni placement in a hospital come Sept - and I am worried that this might trigger my HA (I don't deal with ill/sick people well at the best of times!!)

I would love to hear from anyone who has successfully (or otherwise) reduced their meds - specifically Cit.

Thanks again

[kestral]

why put yourself in a hospital if you cant deal well with sick people, i would think it a sure way of getting problems if your susceptible to HA.

[AnotherNewYear]

Kes because although I am nervous/anxious of being in a hospital ...I refuse to let this illness dictate every part of my life.

[Spikie]

Hi Debs (I assume the Debs mentioned is the OP?)

I am in a very similar situation to you, I have been on Cit for 18 months, had CBT, then decided it was time to kick away the crutch. I dropped from 20mg to 15mg for a week, then yesterday dropped to 10mg.

In all honesty it hasn't been as bad as I expected so far, mostly as I have had times when I had 0mg for days, which were hell.

However, (purely my experience!) I am finding myself VERY anxious at work, wanting to be on my own and assuming everyone is 'out to get me'. I have also been very anxious as to the cleanliness of the kitchen, meaning I have had to clean it.

I am feeling very down, that everything is a disaster, basically back how I was. BUT I have retained enough of my rational mind (the one that was in control more often when I was on 20mg) to know that this is likely temporary (though still scary). Normally I would go back to the doctors, but I never went to see them before I came off, so I'm anxious as to what they will say...

When I start drawing on my fingers in red ink again I will worry, till then I am trying to stay cheerful and busy.

If you want to message me feel free. I only say this as I am currently discontinuing Cit and from the same starting point and length of use as you, so perhaps I am a logical point of reference. But other users will be MUCH more knowledgeable!

[AnotherNewYear]

Hi Spikie - I see you are newish - Welcome to the site.

Thank you very much for taking the time to post your experiences with coming off Cit - it has been very useful. Thank god for the rational mind huh ! ...and LOL @ drawing on your fingers with red ink (i will keep that in mind).

I do not really have the time to message you right now (as i am meant to be writing 3000 words on ethical dilemmas - tho NMP has been a good distraction for me this morning!!!)...but I would love to know a little more of your experiences ...so feel free to message me and i promise i will reply !!

Deb

[london]

but if its working why he want to stop it
its maddness stay on it
god bless

[Spikie]

Thank god for the rational mind huh ! ...and LOL @ drawing on your fingers with red ink (i will keep that in mind).

Deb

It works for me, usually I have to pinch or slightly injure myself a fair bit as well so my finger hurts, but the combination of pain and what looks a little like a cut has been enough to get me through the more minor desires to self harm (which has been all of them since I went on Cit).

Of course I imagine this only works for self harmers! :)

I will try and send you a message if you like when I have some free time, but there's no pressure for you to message me back, I just thought I should point out we might be quite similar in position :)

[Megan73]

Hi Deb

Just thought I tell you my experience of being on Citalopram. I know a lot of people rightly believe they don't want to be on it long term, however I've found staying on it long term is a life saver.

A few years ago I was happy on 10mg long term, life wasn't perfect but ok, I decided with my GP I would come off it totally as I didn't like being dependent on a drug and also my GP prescribing it. BIG MISTAKE!

After 8 months drug free I hit rock bottom and I never want to go there again. I thought I'd suffered bad anxiety before but nothing compared to this, it was truly horrendous.

I went back on citalopram again and suffered terrible side effects, not experienced the 1st time. I stuck with it and was on 20mg plus CBT (mixed thoughts on that). I felt great and have stayed on 20mg for just over 2 years.

Once more I'm down to 10mg and must say the negative thoughts are slowly creeping in and my habits of dealing with anxiety are reverting to pre CBT ones. I never had this problem on 20mg, although my memory is much better at 10mg.

All I can say is each person is different. I'd like to go back up 20mg but realise it is better to be on a lower dose long term so will stick with it for the time being.

Give 10mg a go, it may be all you need.

Good luck

Megan

[AnotherNewYear]

Thank you London and Megan for your thoughts. It is such a hard decision - the last thing i want is to become anxious over it lol.

I guess i have two months to mull it over before I have to make a decision ...but it is really helpful and interesting hearing others views and experiences which can aid me in making my final decision.

Thanks again

[Spikie]

Hi Deb

although my memory is much better at 10mg.



My 'natural' memory is poor (unless I make a real effort), and my 20mg memory is clouded, so poor. I'm hoping 10mg will be the magic level that gives me a good memory :)

[Jamesk]

My 'natural' memory is poor (unless I make a real effort), and my 20mg memory is clouded, so poor. I'm hoping 10mg will be the magic level that gives me a good memory :)

My memory is really bad at the moment, it took me about ten minutes to bring Lenny Henry's name to mind the other day, and I am increasingly forgetting casual aquintances names.

Of course having lost my mum to Alzheimers this inevitably gives me a new thing to panic over. :scared15:

[AnotherNewYear]

or it could just be old age James ;0P ...

I am not sure that Cit has affected my memory ...or it could be that i just dont remember how it used to be ;0P

[london]

about this tell him your TRY after you have done the placement at the hospital
god bless

---------- Post added at 13:26 ---------- Previous post was at 13:25 ----------


My memory is really bad at the moment, it took me about ten minutes to bring Lenny Henry's name to mind the other day, and I am increasingly forgetting casual aquintances names.

Of course having lost my mum to Alzheimers this inevitably gives me a new thing to panic over. :scared15:


Alzheimers is ok you meet new people eery day
god bless

[saro]

I took citalopram a few years ago when I was about 22 and I tried to come off them after a year or so and I did unfortunately go back to square one. A year later I was back on them and now ive been on them for a year again and have no plans to come off mine anytime soon. Thats my experience but if you feel ready then go for it but if you are good they why change something that doesnt need fixing. xx

[AnotherNewYear]

Thanks again all

Interesting Sar - and pretty depressing !!! Makes me want to stay on them even more lol

There must be some good stories out there !!??

[Elen]

I guess a lot of it comes down to how much you percieve your improved mental health to be due to the meds and how much due to the CBT.

As you know I have suffered most of my life with depression and it has only been in the last 6 months that I have found any sort of peace.

Staying on meds for the rest of my life does not bother me one little bit, descending back into the black hole most certainly does.

I agree with London and perhaps suggesting a compromise of reducing your dose after your placement may be workeable.

My GP has suggested the same for me so I wonder if it is part of their general protocol.

[AnotherNewYear]

Hey Elen

Yep i would rather be on meds for the rest of my life then go back to how life was 15 months ago... I am scared that the doc will force me into stopping - do they do that ? It does seem crazy to stop something that is working so well - dont know why he even suggested it - maybe it is the cost ?

[Stormsky]

The doc cant force you to stop them... i took meds for 9yrs, but decided to come off... i think they like you to have reviews 6 monthly to discuss if you can come off, but they cant stop them.. My dads on them for life..

[AnotherNewYear]

Ta for the information Storm - makes me feel better