Dont know where to turn

[jayred]

Hi

Sorry if this is long winded I have always been really worried and anxious about my health ever since i was young but last year i went through a really stressful and draining time in my life. For a long time i have had stomach issues which the doctor then prescribed as IBS but i was walking across a bridge last year when all off a sudden my legs just went wobbly and since then i have had the feeling of a blurry eye i seem to be forgetting things at times for years i have had bad sleep patterns and on off headaches.

I was previously very anti going to the doctor but decided i wanted to try change that and ensure my health was good and try to lift all of these worries from my shoulders. So I firstly went to a Sexual health clinic as i was having worries about that and after giving me a blood test I convinced myself i had HIV read up all about it and got myself into a frenzy of worry and feeling sick that I phoned them up crying of fear that i hadn’t had my results which then came back negative on all fronts which was a relief although i still for a day or 2 convinced myself they may of got it wrong or looked at the wrong patient. So next I went to the Doctor about my stomach which was the start of all my worries where he gave me tablets but didn’t want to talk about any other issues like the eye and lightheaded and vertigo problems that i had recently experienced as we only had a 10 minute appointment so I took my course while in the mean time I was having constant tiredness and stiff necks and also a fear of social places where i would become extra lightheaded that would affect me for days on end. I then did what everybody now says you shouldn’t and started researching my problems I first told myself I had Bowel Cancer but that’s been put to 1 side then i started having a ringing ear from loud music and alongside my blurry eye (which probably wasn’t blurry) and my muscles on the left side of the face feeling tense I convinced myself I had a brain tumour again I have put that to 1 side for now but then in the back of my mind i had been looking at MS and a lot of my symptoms matched to that. I also started thinking about the past and always seem to get injuries easily and also my muscles take forever to recover when I go to the gym and made me wonder if this is something I could of had for years i am now scaring myself every day of my life. I went back to my doctor and told him a few of the problems but he said it was all in my head and i could either take a course of Anti-depressants or go away from there and live my life and not stress over things that happen to everybody but people like myself spend periods of time worrying and stressing over them i went away from there and for a few days did feel better and i relaxed and didn’t stress over things then the week later i was in a shopping centre and i started to feel lightheaded again and all of a sudden i was back to square 1 again researching and now i have convinced myself that i have MS and have thought through the years how many things match up i even yesterday started having a numb tingly feeling in my right leg after during the day reading how that was a sign. This was the first time i have had any affect on my right side of my body as previously it has always been my left side that i have had problems with leg my hand bones feeling stiff my left eye my left ear and everything else. I also have become very itchy and seem to have skin issues when i itch i come up in little lumps and a long line wherever it is ive scratched i also get really red just from the smallest of touches.

To be honest in the back of my head i know that it is probably all in my head but i just dont get how all these things can happen just from thinking it surely there has to be a reason behind it i feel stupid talking to people or going to the doctor again and just dont know what i should do im scared i dont want to be like this or have these problems anymore i just want to live a normal life sorry if this doesn’t make sense or is long winded i have just written down what is on my mind at the time.

Thank You

---------- Post added at 10:16 ---------- Previous post was at 10:10 ----------

forgot to mention i also convinced myself i had leukimia due to small blood spots and the tiredness feeling but my doctor told me this again is normal. I also sometimes after a really hard workout feel really fatigued and confused which is another worry i tell myself i must have problems with

[pearl79]

its makes alot of sense, i have suffered HA for years now, and id give anything to be the carefree person i once was. Its so tough, but some time i think over worrying about symptoms gives you symptoms if that makes sense? Because since ive had anxiety and the mountain of times ive been to the doctors the more and more pains and symptoms ive have have felt. Yet when in the middle of the night and wake in a panic i cannot tell my self its all my anxiety cuz the 'what if's!' creep in. Its a constant struggle and a battle i hope to eventually win. Its silly really cuz if you look at the whole picture ive been dying of a dozen cancers and illnesses for about 5 years now!! What a waste and i continue to worry nd think the worst.
Please dont feel stupid, you are not!! Its anxiety and its pants!!! Try not to fight the anxiety, if you start to worry say to your self 'nope not listening' cuz its not you, its the anxiety controlling us.
goodluck , message me anytime. im always a ear to chat to as i have tons of expirience x

[jayred]

Hi thank you so much for your reply. I definately agree with over worrying the symptoms gives you more as it just has a knock on affect to other things. Just wandering have you tried CBT or anything along those lines. I was getting better then like i say i had that brief moment when shopping and after my extensive research into MS i have now dropped worse then ever before and for believe i have MS when to be honest somebody with MS is probably going through alot worse then me. I think its just more the believing anxiety can do this to ourselves that is the first big battle i just want to overcome it. Thank you though so much for your response its nice for somebody to take the time to show they care and we both need to overcome this it was only like a year ago i was carefree and like you i just want that back.

[jayred]

Been online all day tried not researching but reading through forums has helped but im still having a strange tingle when walking but like i said this just happened after reading yesterday so unless a coincidence then well u know.

[jayred]

Just wandering if anybody else gets the tingle sensation its weird as it only happened after i read about it when i stupidly diagnosed myself with MS and it comes and goes and i went to the gym yesterday was fine been fine but every now and again i just get it in different positions at first just my feet. Doesnt help my body is aching from the gym.

[worrybear]

Hi
I get tingling all the time,its a horrible feeling and it jumps from one place to another but i mainly get it in my back.
I googled tingling about 2 months ago and since then ive convinced myself i have it,after reading the symptoms ive had loads of ms symptoms but i dont know if thats because ive looked them up!
My gp wont discuss ms with me because she says ive got anxiety!
I think what makes it worse is theres no test for ms.
If i could just have a test and them tell me im ok my symptoms might start to go.
I know exactly how your feeling and its horrible :(

[jayred]

Yeah im in completely the same boat as u i think ms is a very very difficult 1 as theres so many similarities but theres no simple test its basically a process of elimination or waiting for something to happen. But i do think it probably more in our heads that we put 2 an 2 together. I wish i would never of googled as the tingling has been worse since them which is stupid plus im more worried