cas2ce
20-05-12, 06:17
Hi everyone, I feel I need to post this so I can look back at it later and have a good old vent.
I am a 25 yr old female - when I was 18 i was diagnosed as agoraphobic, panic disorder and GAD.
After many years in therapy, I finally came good with a lot of hard work and was leading a normal life panic free, I won't say that the anxiety was gone 100% but it didn't stop me leading a "normal life".
In that time I have also dealt with post traumatic stress (and overcome it).
I'd also like to mention that in the earlier days I tried at least 7 or 8 different medications, mainly SSRI's and one antipsychotic. I reacted badly to all the medication and my doctor decided they were allergic reactions, so I absolutely can not take them.
The only thing that has ever calmed me down was valium in a very low dose (1-2mg as needed).
I would only take the valium maybe once every 6months or so as REALLY needed.
anyways - throughout the years I always had the same symptoms, Feeling spacey, hyperventilating, impending doom, fear of heart attack and what not.
Fast forward to recently. My birthday was Feb 7th, I had a lovely massage and came home feeling great, I had trouble with an infected wisdom tooth and was prescribed antibiotics for it (I had taken them before) I took the antibiotic, and 5 mins later went into anaphylactic shock - something I had NEVER experienced before and did not know what it was.
Fortunatley I was able to call an ambulance from my kitchen floor.
From early March I started having a few situational panic attacks which I brushed off so I wouldn't fuel the fire.
April 8th - I have a massive panic attack at home which didn't feel like panic, but I decided to treat it as such by taking 1mg of valium- that was 8pm.
3am I try to go to sleep, and my legs start to shake violently - freaking me out Tried to get up and walk it off, but it got worse and worse- I don't know how but I sped myself t the hospital and was kept in for 4 hrs until getting a diagnosis of anxiety :mad:.
By 11 am I was taken back there until blood tests were done and I was told to get the results from my GP.
The GP ordered further blood tests, as I was convinced it was Physical (and still am to some extent).
Tests came back normal :scared15:
My mind still tells me he mustn't have checked something right.
Might I mention In all my time of having anxiety - I have never been convinced I am physically Ill. I have never had a blood test to rule anything out, and I most certainly have not been to a hospital.
Ok so I decide I will get over this. Not so easy - Insomnia starts, butterflies, i am crippled by now.
April 19th back to the ER - sent home with some type of antipsychotic that I AM ALLERGIC TOO! I don't take it, but I had many years ago.
By April 30th I pretty much could not eat, I have never had sleep or eating problems before.
By May 5th - I call an ambulance, i have had enough. They say my obs are fine, take me to hospital, I get an idea in my head about being admitted to the psych ward so I leave the hospital and start trying to force feed myself.
Not much success :weep:
I started back in therapy on April 26 but have a hard time concentrating through the strong feelings of wanting to throw up.
May 14th - I organise for my mum to fly in as I am totally debilitated, I can barely shower, Can't eat without wanting to throw up, can't sleep, and worse, when I don't eat I want to throw up also! I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T WIN!!!
Today is the 20th of May 2012 - My mum has been making me eat small portions every hour, even though it is extremely hard.
My current complaints if anyone can help - I feel sick when I do and don't eat. not just sick but random gagging, and I have a horrible fear of throwing up.
I cry all the time.
I feel like there is mucus in my throat
I can taste vinegar or salt all the time
I am tense all day every day
I shake all day
I cannot relax
I feel like I am taking 1 step forward and 10 back.
My mum says it is a positive sign that my bowel movements are a little more normal, I just can't see any positives.
I feel like I need more then therapy this time, but am allergic to meds so no idea what to do.
I was given stemitil by the doctor and its not helping the nausea, I have tried ginger, Gaviscon, zantac, and chewable antacids NOTHING IS HELPING ME!
20 days without an appetite is very unusual for me.
I apologise for the long post but I need to put it out there. Thanks.:scared15:
I am a 25 yr old female - when I was 18 i was diagnosed as agoraphobic, panic disorder and GAD.
After many years in therapy, I finally came good with a lot of hard work and was leading a normal life panic free, I won't say that the anxiety was gone 100% but it didn't stop me leading a "normal life".
In that time I have also dealt with post traumatic stress (and overcome it).
I'd also like to mention that in the earlier days I tried at least 7 or 8 different medications, mainly SSRI's and one antipsychotic. I reacted badly to all the medication and my doctor decided they were allergic reactions, so I absolutely can not take them.
The only thing that has ever calmed me down was valium in a very low dose (1-2mg as needed).
I would only take the valium maybe once every 6months or so as REALLY needed.
anyways - throughout the years I always had the same symptoms, Feeling spacey, hyperventilating, impending doom, fear of heart attack and what not.
Fast forward to recently. My birthday was Feb 7th, I had a lovely massage and came home feeling great, I had trouble with an infected wisdom tooth and was prescribed antibiotics for it (I had taken them before) I took the antibiotic, and 5 mins later went into anaphylactic shock - something I had NEVER experienced before and did not know what it was.
Fortunatley I was able to call an ambulance from my kitchen floor.
From early March I started having a few situational panic attacks which I brushed off so I wouldn't fuel the fire.
April 8th - I have a massive panic attack at home which didn't feel like panic, but I decided to treat it as such by taking 1mg of valium- that was 8pm.
3am I try to go to sleep, and my legs start to shake violently - freaking me out Tried to get up and walk it off, but it got worse and worse- I don't know how but I sped myself t the hospital and was kept in for 4 hrs until getting a diagnosis of anxiety :mad:.
By 11 am I was taken back there until blood tests were done and I was told to get the results from my GP.
The GP ordered further blood tests, as I was convinced it was Physical (and still am to some extent).
Tests came back normal :scared15:
My mind still tells me he mustn't have checked something right.
Might I mention In all my time of having anxiety - I have never been convinced I am physically Ill. I have never had a blood test to rule anything out, and I most certainly have not been to a hospital.
Ok so I decide I will get over this. Not so easy - Insomnia starts, butterflies, i am crippled by now.
April 19th back to the ER - sent home with some type of antipsychotic that I AM ALLERGIC TOO! I don't take it, but I had many years ago.
By April 30th I pretty much could not eat, I have never had sleep or eating problems before.
By May 5th - I call an ambulance, i have had enough. They say my obs are fine, take me to hospital, I get an idea in my head about being admitted to the psych ward so I leave the hospital and start trying to force feed myself.
Not much success :weep:
I started back in therapy on April 26 but have a hard time concentrating through the strong feelings of wanting to throw up.
May 14th - I organise for my mum to fly in as I am totally debilitated, I can barely shower, Can't eat without wanting to throw up, can't sleep, and worse, when I don't eat I want to throw up also! I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T WIN!!!
Today is the 20th of May 2012 - My mum has been making me eat small portions every hour, even though it is extremely hard.
My current complaints if anyone can help - I feel sick when I do and don't eat. not just sick but random gagging, and I have a horrible fear of throwing up.
I cry all the time.
I feel like there is mucus in my throat
I can taste vinegar or salt all the time
I am tense all day every day
I shake all day
I cannot relax
I feel like I am taking 1 step forward and 10 back.
My mum says it is a positive sign that my bowel movements are a little more normal, I just can't see any positives.
I feel like I need more then therapy this time, but am allergic to meds so no idea what to do.
I was given stemitil by the doctor and its not helping the nausea, I have tried ginger, Gaviscon, zantac, and chewable antacids NOTHING IS HELPING ME!
20 days without an appetite is very unusual for me.
I apologise for the long post but I need to put it out there. Thanks.:scared15: