Really annoyed with myself

[lass]

I went back to my doctor today because (up until last weekend) I have felt I am really losing control with my anxiety. Since the weekend I have actually calmed down a bit but I thought I'd go along for the appointment as I might be able to explain myself a bit better if I am less anxious. I was going to write down everything I wanted to say, but then decided that I was capable of putting my point across as thought I was feeling so much better.

So when I get to the doctors today, I find myself falling apart again! Doctor asked me how I was doing and I immediately filled up with tears (kinda self pity I guess). I was so keen to try and get some advice from her on how to cope, rather than just taking some kind of anti depressent, and I also wanted to ask about an amino acid called GABA which is prescription only and which I'd heard can be good for calming the mind and reducing mental chatter.

But because I'd got myself all anxious just about having a doctors appointment, I've ended up with a prescription for Amitriptyline (which apparently is anti anxiety and will help me sleep better). She's also arranging for me to see the counsellor to try to get to the root of my anxiety.

So all in all, I think my doctor thinks I am mental and depressed because I am nearly always reduced to tears when I see her (I tried to explain to her I'm not like this most of the time, just anxious, not depressed!). And I feel I didn't really achieve what I'd set out to.

Anyway, I shall give the medication a go, as my biggest worry is that I am going on holiday and with loads of spare time will my mind work overtime and drive me mad with anxious thoughts? And I'm not sure if counselling will help but sounds harmless and I'm happy to give it a go (I do love to talk!).

Anyone know anything about Amitriptyline?

Caroline
xx

[scoobygirl2005]

Hi.

Aw sorry to hear you are feeling like this. If you are worried about being driven mad with lots of thoughts you could occupy yourself with something else in your spare time, have you got any hobbies?

Scooby2005
x x

[lass]

Well, I have 2 jobs and 2 kids to keep me busy! I also go to the gym whenever I can, and do a bit of scrap-booking when I have a free evening. To be honest I get very little spare time. But I find that I cannot stop thinking EVER! and it's particularly bad when I'm driving, even though I'm half listening to the radio. Whatever I'm doing, I feel I only have half my mind on, and the other half is working hard to get me wound up.

I have had a relatively good week, but I found my symptoms getting worse with PMT and I had a really bad 2 weeks last month. I just wanted to get myself sorted out as my PMT will kick in during my 2nd week of holiday and I don't want to wreck it for everyone.

I guess it's just the nature of my anxiety that I am worrying about what I can worry about when I am on holiday. Everyone keeps telling me that I'll feel loads better when I am away from home and relaxing on holiday. I hope they are right!

[scoobygirl2005]

Aw bless. You sound quite busy then lol. They are right you will feel so much more relaxed when you are on holiday. Try not to worry mate.

Scooby2005
x x