littleredhen
27-06-12, 22:48
One of things I've realised is that I don't do anything for the long-term. I'm very good at doing something NOW, or for TOMORROW, but I am absolutely rubbish at planning anything for more than, say, six months away. I've always felt that life wasn't real and that I would die before the year is out, so what's the point in planning anything long-term?
Anyway, I am working hard to overcome these negative thoughts and today I booked a holiday for NEXT FEBRUARY!
My husband has been nagging me for ages to book it (it's doing something that is my specialism) but I've been putting it off and off and feeling more and more anxious about it. It's a really expensive holiday and I couldn't get away from the thoughts that I don't deserve such a lovely holiday and what's the point anyway, because it's bound to go wrong: we'd split up, have an accident, someone would die or get ill, or just anything really to prevent me from doing it. So, today I just phone up the travel agent and booked and paid the deposit - there, done.
I feel quite weird about it - some part of me feels that I have just thrown away a big wodge of moolah pointlessly, but another part of me feels quite motivated by it.
a little bit: :wacko:
but quite a bit: :yesyes:
Anyway, I am working hard to overcome these negative thoughts and today I booked a holiday for NEXT FEBRUARY!
My husband has been nagging me for ages to book it (it's doing something that is my specialism) but I've been putting it off and off and feeling more and more anxious about it. It's a really expensive holiday and I couldn't get away from the thoughts that I don't deserve such a lovely holiday and what's the point anyway, because it's bound to go wrong: we'd split up, have an accident, someone would die or get ill, or just anything really to prevent me from doing it. So, today I just phone up the travel agent and booked and paid the deposit - there, done.
I feel quite weird about it - some part of me feels that I have just thrown away a big wodge of moolah pointlessly, but another part of me feels quite motivated by it.
a little bit: :wacko:
but quite a bit: :yesyes: