Difficulty in saying 'no'

[PanickyPolly]

Hi guys,

I've read that people with anxiety and epression tend to have issues with self esteem and can't say no to things. We're not assertive enough. I often get myelf cornered by sales people for example and they can see my vulnerability and prey on it. Yesterday I was cornered for about the tenth time by a young girl trying to sell me nail products and expensive moisturisers from the Dead Sea. I tried to tell her I didn't have any money to buy anything but she kept on and on and on and on and on. Also my friends tend to walk all over me and use me. As a result I've not heared from any of them for months even though they know how bad I am. Anybody else have this problem?

[Daisybun]

Hi Polly, I can relate to that, i don't like saying 'no' to people and that was a lot of my problem, i would end up taking on too much and i became stressed out and exhausted. I hate conflict situations and confrontations too so I would find myself stuck in the middle at times and not being confident or assertive enough. that's one thing I'm going to have to deal with myself now that i am feeling a little better, as i don't want to go over old ground gain and end up in the same situation!!

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[Two heads]

Gosh you sound just like me!
Trouble is its beging to get expensive now, lol!
But i guess we really are going to have to build our self esteem other wise we are going to be walked on for the rest of our lives.Have you thought about taking a class to help build your self esteem?
I dont no what help a class would be but maybe its worth a try!
Good luckxx

[PanickyPolly]

Yeah actually I think I might look into taking a self confidence/assertive class.

Anybody else tried one if these?

PS: those dead sea face masks are £60. EXTORTIONATE.

[W.I.F.T.S.]

Hi Polly, I know exactly what you mean. I lost loads of 'friends' when I became ill and it dented my faith in human nature. I think a lot of 'normal' people are afraid that depression and anxiety are contagious and, so they try to avoid you. I suppose to some extent that's true, there is a guy at work who seems very depressed to me and he is always moaning about stuff- I have to stay away from him because he makes me feel really down.

I also think that people like us have trouble saying 'yes'. I know that I was always very passive and I didn't want to join things, meet new people, try new experiences or take risks.

Go for the assertiveness class!!!

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.