Bad Day again

[antrob1000]

I am having a really bad day/wwek/year at work and feel really anxious. I just do not know how I can keep going. The last year and half at work has been terrible I spend most of my day with a tight chest and feeling sick and just scared. It all started after being pushed into taking on very technically work without understanding the product. Ever since I have continually been worrying about decision I have made have i done this right will this go wrong and I will loose my job. I worry and feel anxious about work in evenings and all weekend and really effecting my life. I just feel so low and just want the anxiety/worry to go away so I can just feel normal again. Does anyone else feel like this?

[m.elise]

I'm in a similar situation with my job. I really have to fight anxiety as soon as I sit down in my chair in my office. Is it possible for you to leave your job?

[antrob1000]

Thanks for you reply.
Not really as have a wife and 2 year old to support and I am determined not to let them down. I am just having a really tough time at the moment and hope that things will get better. I have always have a level of anxiety but work over the last year has just increased by a thousand times. Think back a year or so I never really ever felt anxious about work outside of work it all down to having a lot of unfair responsibility.

[Beckybooboo]

Hi,

I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this issue. I know how difficult it can be.

Let me tell you, the best thing I did was take some time away from work to clear my head. I was off for a month in total and at the beginning I was a wreck, I was bored and my thoughts were erratic, but, with time I was able to start focusing on what I wanted to achieve and what I could do to better myself.

I returned to work, only to find that I had been accepted for another job at a bigger company with better pay and left without working my notice. I know it seems difficult right now, but the best thing you could do is visit your GP, speak to your partner and clarify the situation and see what options work best for you.

I really hope you're okay, and wish you all the best,
Becky

[Kittygoat]

I really get how you guys are feeling. I am recently out of education, and having to stay in a part time job due to the fact when ever I try to move on, the physical symptoms of my anxiety make it impossible to go on, and I have to leave :( anxiety feels like a bit of a losing battle sometimes, but I have found I have been able to get back to being stable in my mind by getting out of the situations that make me anxious ASAP.. At least you guys aren't giving up like I do.

[Danny_dingle]

Hello everyone,

I am having a similar problem. I recently left a job in retail (I have been in retail for 7 years, since leaving school) that wasn't bad but where I felt that I wasn't being supported and progressed like I should have been due to my manager being a bit of a nightmare. I was also worried because the company was doing really badly and I suspected they may shut soon. This wasn't anxiety telling me this: I have had a very similar experience in a very similar company which actually did shut down, so I know the warning signs.

I went into a 9-5 office job for a growing company (although still small) for more money and with more prospects, where I could tell I was going to be treated with respect. I have been there a month now, and I absolutely hate it. I have cried about it most days, I am under immense pressure, I feel really stupid (I am the only one there who doesn't have a degree). The work has to be exact, to the point where the way you phrase a sentence is criticised down to the positioning of each word, and I am already being expected to manage almost as much of a workload as the other people who have been there for 9 months to two years. I am doing 10 hour days, and I am being shown very complex processed at speed once then expected to just pick them up and get them exactly right right first time. The manager keeps saying he is 'disappointed' when I get something tiny wrong.

I have turned back into an anxious person with no self esteem, and I feel horrible. I am waking up with palpatations, I keep crying before they day starts (and after it's finished) and sit at my desk with stomach cramps, shaking and feeling sick for hours on end.

I feel I need to go, but quitting is making me feel like a failure. I know if I were a more confident person I would be fine.

I just feel that I need and want to go back into retail, which I do ultimately enjoy and I know so well. Hindsight is always 20:20 I suppose.

But is this anxiety just going to follow me around? I am never happy with anything, maybe I am just being high maintenance. But I stayed in my last job for a year and ten months, in a full time supervisory role, and although it hacked me off at times (who doesn't get annoyed at their job on occasion?) it was much better for me and part of me is so annoyed that I left for something it now turns out I hate.

I'm sorry to crash the post, but I've barely been on this site for over two years (ish) and then the last few days I have been surfing around other people's posts procrastinating, trying to put down my thoughts and ultimately chickening out.

Does anyone think I am being foolish to leave? I think initially I will go to the doctors on Monday, and will potentially get myself signed off for a week or two to get the anxiety fixed and to sort myself out, and look for something else.

I feel like an idiot and a failure, and like I have just given up because I am lazy. Please help me. Am I doing the right thing?

Danny

[antrob1000]

I feel exactly the same way every day I wake up witha tight chest feelign sick and not able to participate in normal life. I have been in this job for 5 years and the first 3 and half years were fine never had any issues. but teh last 1 to 1 and half a yesr have been a nightmare. I only get up and go every day as i have a family to support and do not want to give in and let them beat me.

I feel like I have given to much responisbility and pressure and know one cares. I do beleieve majority of my anxiety is caused by work pressures but I also worry taht it is me being weak and just worryign to much. I was diagonised with OCD over health fears 3 yaesr ago which I got over with CBT and it has not returned since. But i worry that this may also be OCD but deep down I just feel like it is work giving me to much responsibility and pressures. I cannot get signed off as already had metign abourt my attendance as been off 3 occasion in one year. These sickness were not related to anxiety OCD etc just stomach bugs and injuring my hand. So I just do not knwo what to do and I just keep going and trying to make the bes of it. As I do not knwo what else I can do.

Danny let me know how you are getting on it is nice to speak to someoene that is in a simiular situation.

[Danny_dingle]

Hello antrob,

Just to keep you updated, I did get signed off sick on Monday and have applied for several new jobs since, and have already had one interview and I've got another one booked. I wasn't calming down yet because I kept thinking what happens when my sick note runs out and I have to go back? So I handed my notice in yesterday. It is a bit of a gamble but it now means that I can freely go to interviews without fear of being 'caught' by my manager when I really ought to be at work, and it means I don't have to worry about going back any more. I don't have any money but I am going to get signed on as soon as my sick note runs out (a week Monday) whilst I am looking, and because I have been realistic with the jobs I have applied for I hope I won't be out of work for long.

With regards my anxiety in the long run, I am seeing my old counsellor again on Monday afternoon, which I am chuffed to bits about because she was excellent last time. I have a lot of stuff that's happened all at once and I think it has overwhelmed me, but this should hopefully mean that I can get it all off my chest and feel and think a bit healthier again.

Maybe your best bet is to have a sit down with your manager and tell him about what is going on? Maybe they do have strict rules on sickness (I worked somewhere where they did the while 3 sickness periods in a year thing aswell) but if you have a genuine medical condition, which it sounds like you do in the form of anxiety, they can't just sack you. And if they did you could sue them for a pretty penny for unfair dismissal!! When I handed my notice in yesterday I managed to dig up some confidence from the depths and I was bold and honest with my manager, telling him that I was leaving because I hadn't realised this was what the job would be like until I was in it, and he thanked me for coming in to talk to him and also for being honest. I think these things sometimes seem scary until we do them, then they aren't so bad.

In short, what I'm trying to say is that maybe you should have a meeting with you manager about how you feel, tell him in advance when you are going to go to the doctors (maybe it could be a holiday day or one days' unpaid leave if he won't allow you a sick day?), then go to the doctors and get them to help you. If they managed to help you before, then they can help you again, and this way your manager can't be mad at you because he knows what's going on in advance (I would also make a note of the conversation with the time and date, and possibly take a colleague you trust in with you just so that you have some record of, and a witness to, what has been said).

Also, does your company have an HR line you can call? They helped me a lot recently when my manager tried to make my life hell at my job before this one after I handed my notice in, and they are obliged to keep your conversation confidential.

I know you have a family to support and I imagine that it must be a lot of pressure, but right now you need them to support you a little bit until you get better. Have you talked to your partner? Was she with you when you had OCD before? If yes, then I am sure she will understand the importance of you getting yourself better.

I hope my waffle makes sense and helps you out.

Take care of yourself,

Danny x