no friends

[ruby1]

I have no friends and havnt made a single friend in 10 years i dont know how to any more im very shy cannot make conversation with anyone. Im not sure how everyone else manages to make friends so easily is making me really down :shrug:

[theharvestmouse]

Do you do anything to put yourself in a situation where you could make friends?. That is the key to making friends, to try to do things where you will meet people with similar interests. By the way I know how difficult it is to make friends when you have anxiety. I have lost most of mine through different reasons.

[ruby1]

hi thanks for replying :) i work in a hotel but still not able to make friends i can talk about work but have no idea how to actully feel a connection with sombody i did in school but as at 26 yold im finding it hard. when it should be easy

[theharvestmouse]

It gets more difficult to make friends as you get older especially if you suffer from anxiety. You might have to broaden your horizons, and try to join some social groups. If you have any hobbies like playing sport, or anything like that then you could try to join a club. Work is not the only place to meet people.

Don't beat yourself up about it, making good friends is not that easy.

[amdhyde]

Hey ruby I also find it very hard to make friends and I have done for many years. I was picked on at school a lot and my family upbringing was not the best either.. When my anxiety kicked in it became even harder to meet people infact I lost most of my friends.

Anyway your in a good place right now with regards to these forums. I had people contact me on here not long after joining offering me somewhere to go if I need to chat :) online is great place to start meeting people and get talking which in turn will build your confidence.

There's a meet up/get together area to these forums you should check that out. And if you ever need a chat drop me a pm I'm normally about.


Take care x

[ruby1]

hi amdhyde thanks for replying sorry uv had a bad time too, Have u made any friends in real life from here or just on the chat rooms

[RockShox]

Hi Ruby1. I'm in exactly the same boat. I've had SA since I was 20 (9 years), met few friends and just feel as though I have no conversation. Luckily though SA is said to be easy to treat, and you can get a referral from your Doc for CBT. Have you tried anything like this before?

[Jon1979]

Hi Ruby1

Its difficult and I, and most people on here will understand where you are coming from. If you ever want a chat, feel free to message me.

Jon :)

[shea]

I am pretty much the same. At 28, I can't particularly say I have any real close friends. I have mates from uni, but rarely see any of them since we finished. I get on well with people at work, but none of them are particularly 'friends'. We may all go out together for social events, but theres not really anyone in particular who I could text to meet up with without it seeming 'weird'!
I know I need to broaden my social horizons, but I find it difficult to make that transition from getting on well with people when we see each other (through work, school gates etc), and actually forming a proper friendship IYKWIM.

[electrical_stormgirl]

I feel the same, although reading Dare to Connect by Susan Jeffers has helped. Support from forums like this have really helped me too. we're all here for you :hugs:

[Mr Brownstone]

What do you enjoy doing?What are your interests?

[blue_haired_devil]

Same here. Lived in London for 3 years and made not a single friend, now in Essex and it's the same. I just can't connect with people or get them to want to connect with me. Something is missing inside me.

[littleredhen]

There are several local support groups stemming from this forum - the one in Kent for example. this weekend we are meeting in Dartford. You could try to see if you have a local group near you at which you will meet people who at least understand where you are coming from.

Also - try: meetup.com this is a social networking site that helps you find friends and company of people who have similar interests as you and you can search by postcode. For instance, if you put in Dartford as your location and search for Bookgroups, you will find the bookgroup that I run. There are quite a lot of social anxiety groups there and depression support. All the meetups I've been to are full of people of who have joined because they don't know anyone in their local area and want to make friends. It can take time, but i have made a couple of good friends via meetup. Everyone is in the same boat.

try it. If you don't like it you can walk away.

pm me if you want any more info or tips on how to make it work for you. x

[kashameets]

If anyone would like to come along to one of our meets you would be more than welcome too :bighug1:
As Lisa has said next meet is this Saturday in Dartford but we have meets all over the place:)

Everyone at a meet understands how you feel as they feel the same way....walk in as strangers but leave as friends :D

More info here http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=111928