Hezman
21-07-12, 19:13
:scared15:Basicallly since I were younger I've always had mild dyspraxia and always been quite inattentive since I were younger always said things without thinking, not do aswell as I were meant to in school and showing lack of interest for things and never ever did well making friends unless they were already friends of friends.
I remember having some social anxiety to when I used to go into pubs with my parents when younger I'd be forever asking to go home and saying I feel sick and that.
More recently though I've attempted college twice and left after a month, I just go into a weird state of my mind and don't feel sociable and feel closed in and time feels like it's ticking away so slow I start to think about all positives and cons but always go with the negative side and leave and ALWAYS regret it later.
I have had jobs mainly cleaning, I cleaned for a retail store who gave me a job as a store assistant after 3 weeks just one day I snapped I just dropped everything I was doing and just decided the jobs weren't for me my thoughts were racing that bad I couldn't think straight and went home and lay down for a hour because I felt terrible.
I felt relieved not going to work until after a week my thoughts start to race, money issues, job in general and boredom.
I have now had the cleaning job back for 3 days and have to cover the supervisor for the whole next week I feel terrible, I can't stop thinking about how everyone thinking I'm stupid for quitting the store job, I regret it myself and just feel guilty strangely.
sorry for ,but not alot, I remember my thoughts being like this before I even touched alcohol anything I notice when I smoke weed my mind focuses and tells me what I did were wrong and to get back to work.
I am fed up of feeling happy and able to do things one day and then feeling achey and cba I have terrible sinus issues aswell, weirdly enough though when I had tramadol for pain relief instead of sending me sleepy this made me want to work and socialise a whole lot more I felt opposite to how I feel usually.
I remember having some social anxiety to when I used to go into pubs with my parents when younger I'd be forever asking to go home and saying I feel sick and that.
More recently though I've attempted college twice and left after a month, I just go into a weird state of my mind and don't feel sociable and feel closed in and time feels like it's ticking away so slow I start to think about all positives and cons but always go with the negative side and leave and ALWAYS regret it later.
I have had jobs mainly cleaning, I cleaned for a retail store who gave me a job as a store assistant after 3 weeks just one day I snapped I just dropped everything I was doing and just decided the jobs weren't for me my thoughts were racing that bad I couldn't think straight and went home and lay down for a hour because I felt terrible.
I felt relieved not going to work until after a week my thoughts start to race, money issues, job in general and boredom.
I have now had the cleaning job back for 3 days and have to cover the supervisor for the whole next week I feel terrible, I can't stop thinking about how everyone thinking I'm stupid for quitting the store job, I regret it myself and just feel guilty strangely.
sorry for ,but not alot, I remember my thoughts being like this before I even touched alcohol anything I notice when I smoke weed my mind focuses and tells me what I did were wrong and to get back to work.
I am fed up of feeling happy and able to do things one day and then feeling achey and cba I have terrible sinus issues aswell, weirdly enough though when I had tramadol for pain relief instead of sending me sleepy this made me want to work and socialise a whole lot more I felt opposite to how I feel usually.