DreamsInSpace2
24-07-12, 18:32
I am at the end of my tether. 3 years ago I was agoraphobic due to Emetophobia, I stopped eating and went through a pretty tough time with it. I was fine for these almost 3 years, now the past 2-3 weeks I am suddenly agoraphobic again, I can't leave the house, constantly having panic attacks, I feel sick with the panic attacks which is petrifying me as I would rather die (please dont comment about this as this is how scary it is for me) and I also have OCD.. and to top it off my digestive system has been playing up! :'(
I had diarrhea this morning which panicked me hoping i will be ok. ok and today i had to go to job centre to do my signing so i can get my money friday (i am on job seekers which i am considering swapping to disability with how paralysing my fear is right now.. as i cant even leave my house!!) .. so yes my mum took me, i walked into the job centre and i freaked, i became very sweaty, i was very flushed, i was panicking, rushing my words, i said to the woman please can i just please sign it and go, she was like are u ok, and she said are u sure its nothing else? (i told her id had diarrhea that morning and just wanted home-hope i will be ok!!) and i said no im fine, and she said u look very flushed, i quickly signed it and i ran out that centre like a shot, i was shaking ran to mums car.. then got in car and i started shaking, seriously panicking and crying and saying please take me home! and she couldnt she had to go to bank to pay bills before work, so she took me, i sat in car whilst she was in bank for 15 mins (this was hell to me) i started sweating, i couldnt breath, i was shaking, felt sick which PETRIFIED me, it felt like hours had passed, i even got my hoody and put it over my eyes, crouched my knees together to hide from the world. then when mum finally got back, i burst into tears again, i needed home, i needed out i was petrified, i was crying and shaking, and i couldnt breath home seemed so far away. and then she had to go to shop too.. i was crying whilst she was in shop she rushed though when we finally got back home, i ran upstairs, grabbed a bottle of water, my things and ran and sat outside, i was unable to breath and felt petrified for 30 mins afterwards, i still feel anxious now i feel anxious ALL day now but when the panic attacks are severe i fear them happening i fear them so much cause of how i feel with them, i hope i'll be ok.
i am now currently worrying because of digestive system, ate crispbread today thats all and im panicking cause of that too.. so fed up of EVERYTHING. i hope i will be ok.
Ok i have been to doctors, they put me on 2 MONTH waiting list to see a psychiatrist i need help NOW! I cant even leave my house, i cant go a day without being petrified :'(
They gave me meds, im too scared to take them, tried but i just cant it leaves me with more severe anxiety attacks
i need help, i need someone to come see me in my home, what do i do?! no one is willing to help me or more they cant, im at the end of my tether i pray i am going to be ok :'(
dunno what to do any more, anyone in same position as me? it seems so unfair i have to go thru this for a third time in my life and this time feels worse the anxiety attacks :'( i just hope i will be ok :'(
I had diarrhea this morning which panicked me hoping i will be ok. ok and today i had to go to job centre to do my signing so i can get my money friday (i am on job seekers which i am considering swapping to disability with how paralysing my fear is right now.. as i cant even leave my house!!) .. so yes my mum took me, i walked into the job centre and i freaked, i became very sweaty, i was very flushed, i was panicking, rushing my words, i said to the woman please can i just please sign it and go, she was like are u ok, and she said are u sure its nothing else? (i told her id had diarrhea that morning and just wanted home-hope i will be ok!!) and i said no im fine, and she said u look very flushed, i quickly signed it and i ran out that centre like a shot, i was shaking ran to mums car.. then got in car and i started shaking, seriously panicking and crying and saying please take me home! and she couldnt she had to go to bank to pay bills before work, so she took me, i sat in car whilst she was in bank for 15 mins (this was hell to me) i started sweating, i couldnt breath, i was shaking, felt sick which PETRIFIED me, it felt like hours had passed, i even got my hoody and put it over my eyes, crouched my knees together to hide from the world. then when mum finally got back, i burst into tears again, i needed home, i needed out i was petrified, i was crying and shaking, and i couldnt breath home seemed so far away. and then she had to go to shop too.. i was crying whilst she was in shop she rushed though when we finally got back home, i ran upstairs, grabbed a bottle of water, my things and ran and sat outside, i was unable to breath and felt petrified for 30 mins afterwards, i still feel anxious now i feel anxious ALL day now but when the panic attacks are severe i fear them happening i fear them so much cause of how i feel with them, i hope i'll be ok.
i am now currently worrying because of digestive system, ate crispbread today thats all and im panicking cause of that too.. so fed up of EVERYTHING. i hope i will be ok.
Ok i have been to doctors, they put me on 2 MONTH waiting list to see a psychiatrist i need help NOW! I cant even leave my house, i cant go a day without being petrified :'(
They gave me meds, im too scared to take them, tried but i just cant it leaves me with more severe anxiety attacks
i need help, i need someone to come see me in my home, what do i do?! no one is willing to help me or more they cant, im at the end of my tether i pray i am going to be ok :'(
dunno what to do any more, anyone in same position as me? it seems so unfair i have to go thru this for a third time in my life and this time feels worse the anxiety attacks :'( i just hope i will be ok :'(