Can someone give me some advice please?

[Louise1234]

Hi everyone,

Basically me and my boyfriend have broken up and im living back at my mums now, and like im just so frightened because through all the years of having my panic attacks my boyfriend has always been there for me...and now im scared because it was kind of like i relyed on him, and now he isnt there i feel like im lost and i dont know what to do..and i feel like im not going to be able to cope without him there.

I know this sounds so stupid, but could anyone please give me any advice or anything please?? xxx

[dally]

Hi louise,
Can you confide in your mum?
I used to confide in my husband ONLY. then he forced me to tell the kids about my panic attacks. so they would understand why I HAD to go to bed a lot(so the kids wouldnt see me shaking and crying) etc.
My daughter sympathises with me, but really doesnt understand what im "frightened" off and cant see the logic.
My son does seem to understand the illogicality of it all and its good to know I can turn to him if im desperate.
So try a member of your family. One of them might understand what youre going through.
It really doesnt matter who it is thats helping you. Just as long as they understand what your going through.
failling this, you can always come on here and talk your fears through this message board.
Its is you who have to help yourself, no-one else can relax you. It is comforting knowing that someone is there beside you. but I feel when I am in a major panic no-one can help me and that is true. It is only you who can control your breathing, do your muscle relaxations and distract your mind. You will also be upset from the split up and that will also be making you very sad, and I know. You will feel better soon. Its a time thing for relationships. take care

[kittikat]

Hi hun,

Sorry to hear about what you are going through, it must be very hard for you atm. Basically your ex became your 'safe person' so as well a losing your partner you have lost the one person you relied on to support you through your anxiety. So this is a double edged sword for you really.

I agree with dally, you need to find someone at home that will understand and help you through. I am sure they wouldn't want you to feel like this. But don't forget, you are also mourning the loss of your relationship and you need to deal with that too.

Sending you one of these :hugs: and hoping that you find the comfort you need.

Good luck, Kitti :)

[Louise1234]

Hi dally - Yes i can talk to my mum but i feel as if she doesnt have a clue, like if i have a panic attack she gets scared and doesnt know what to do, and some times things i tell her she tells my dad what i dont like :( Thats very true when im in full blown panic i feel like no one can help me and that i want to be on my own its very strange lol. Thank you so much for replying to me! xx

kitti - Thank you for replying!! :) yes thats it, thats how i feel like he was the only one that made me feel safe. Thank you for your advice!! :) sending a hug back to you too! :) xx