vulture
26-07-12, 20:25
Hello.
I'm 22 and been having panic attacks since 2009. It used to happen maybe three times a year back then; nowadays it's basically at least once every day.
It's gotten steadily worse.
I get very dizzy, start shaking, sweating, become immensely terrified of everything, and must constantly try not to vomit.
I don't really know what to write here... my biggest fear is not having panic attacks, in my home I can be certain that they will pass and MOST of all: That nobody will see me having the panic attacks. When I'm outside it's a living hell when it happens. It might sound like social phobia but I've never really had that, I can be shy in many situations but before the panic attacks started, I never had a problem minding my business in the city. Today it's even a horror to think about seeing friends. I have to make up reasons not to see them, thus putting them away from me. When I look back and see how fast things have gotten worse and worse, I'm afraid in a few years I'll push everyone away until I'm a complete mental case locked up in some mental institution.
Going to the doctor/therapist is out of the question at the moment, as I'm dreading him/her seeing my panic attack. And yes, that's pathetic! Since it's their profession treating them.
Also I'm male, and I get the feeling it's much more taboo concerning having panic attacks than if women have them. Men are not supposed to be "weak" and show emotions. Has anyone felt this?
Anyway. Hello. Was nice to let out some thoughts.
I'm 22 and been having panic attacks since 2009. It used to happen maybe three times a year back then; nowadays it's basically at least once every day.
It's gotten steadily worse.
I get very dizzy, start shaking, sweating, become immensely terrified of everything, and must constantly try not to vomit.
I don't really know what to write here... my biggest fear is not having panic attacks, in my home I can be certain that they will pass and MOST of all: That nobody will see me having the panic attacks. When I'm outside it's a living hell when it happens. It might sound like social phobia but I've never really had that, I can be shy in many situations but before the panic attacks started, I never had a problem minding my business in the city. Today it's even a horror to think about seeing friends. I have to make up reasons not to see them, thus putting them away from me. When I look back and see how fast things have gotten worse and worse, I'm afraid in a few years I'll push everyone away until I'm a complete mental case locked up in some mental institution.
Going to the doctor/therapist is out of the question at the moment, as I'm dreading him/her seeing my panic attack. And yes, that's pathetic! Since it's their profession treating them.
Also I'm male, and I get the feeling it's much more taboo concerning having panic attacks than if women have them. Men are not supposed to be "weak" and show emotions. Has anyone felt this?
Anyway. Hello. Was nice to let out some thoughts.