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Purdybird
27-05-04, 11:29
I had my first panic attack at the start of April. Looking back, I think it was the climax to all my obsessing, which I think have been doing for months over my health and that of my sons. He had suffered various childhood illnesses since Christmas nothing serious just the normal, colds, stomach flu etc but I was worrying myself stupid that he was seriously ill. Then my attentions turned to me and I started to believe that I had a serious illness. I managed to convince myself that I had developed a blood clot from taking the mini pill. ( I have since stopped taking this ). This started because I was sleeping on the floor next to my son's bed one night when he was poorly and I awoke in the middle of the night with a dead leg which I couldn't move for a split second. Writing it makes it sound soo silly!

I think I'm making me sound a lot worse than I really am. I have not stopped doing all the things I normally would. Although immediately after my panic attack I just wanted to stop in bed all day. My Doc prescribed Prozac but I haven't taken it because of the side effects and plus I would like to overcome this without drugs. I have a few questions that I am hoping somebody could answer for me just to put my mind at rest a bit:

1. When I had my panic attack in April I called an ambulance (embarrassing I know!! ) they carried out a test on my heart an ECG? I think it's called and they also did another at the hospital ( a quick 5 minute job ) . Would this have picked up any problems I could have with my heart?

2. I often get tingling feelings in my right ankle and foot is this also a symptom?

3. I suffer very badly from chest pains / tight chest even when I do not feel particularly anxious. Why?

4. I often feel that I will always feel anxious. PLEASE tell me that some of you have completely overcome this! Can it disappear as quickly as it came?

5. I often feel like I want to suddenly jump up and go mad waving my arms around and scream – it that a symptom too?

I am trying to help myself as much as poss. ( I have been reading this board and site for weeks)I am taking a multi vit,and Fish oil. I have invested in Bach rescue remedy and I am also taking some herbal tablets called Stressless – only one three times a day though, rather than the two it recommends . Any more advice would be very welcome. You all seem so kind and normal ( I have had a quick look at your photos ) – meant in the kindest way! – Sorry to go on a bit.

Thanks x

Meg
27-05-04, 12:17
Hi Purdybird

Welcome - I'm so glad you decided to post. In your weeks observing you have picked up quite a bit already and am sure you've seen other posts you can relate to..


About your issues.

1. Embarassing to you but not to the crew- they get them all the time..
An ECG is an electrical tracing of the heart so things like the rhythm, any ischaemia, old and new heart attacks and general wear and tera will be picked up on that. You only go on to have extra investigations - in the UK - if there looks like being something unexplained or untoward.

2. Unusual to have just one limb affected so I would say no - not a usual anxiety related symptom. Is it the same one as tha dead leg ?

3. Often low grade anxiety shows up in the chest and in the GI system. Try some stretching exercises daily and see if that helps.

4. I'm pretty much over it. I cannot say I never have any anxiety as I have a job that can be stressful dealing with clients and I do national training. I get nervous pre a new training course being delivered.

In my experience it does not go quickly I'm afraid - it takes work and patience and it drifts away.

5. Oh yes. Usually means you've got extra stress hormones on board but not enough to produce other symptoms . Steady exercise wil resolve this. A long brisk walk or swimming are helpful. You don't need to become a gym fanatic. A windy beach in the winter is good for actually doing this !!

Check your multi vit has at leats 50mg of Vit B in it - each sort.

How is your obsessing doing now ?

Keep posting and let us know how you are







Meg

'There can only be true courage when first there is genuine fear'

Dr.David Livingstone

Purdybird
27-05-04, 12:55
Thank you so very much for your reply, it is so nice to communicate with someone who actually understands ( I'm starting to cry now writing this – stupid me !!! ). Yes, it is the leg I had pins and needles in – I'm almost sure that it's all in my imagination. However, I find myself surfing the web trying to diagnose imaginary illnesses and I know, that is the worst thing to do – I am trying not too.

Most of the time I manage not to think about my health. But when I get a quiet moment stupid and irrational thoughts start entering my mind such as, umm that mole looks suspicious – OH MY GOD it could be skin cancer. Then the vicious circle of thoughts starts and I get more and more symptoms of the specific disease and get more and more worked up emotionally. I then start thinking of how much I love my little boy (he will be three in July and he is my life) I get upset because I start thinking that I wont see him grow up. I know it sounds ridiculous but it's how I feel.

Writing all this down make me realise how completely ridiculous I am being. I know I have got to focus on the positives – it's just so hard sometime.

My mum was also diagnosed with Bowl cancer last year and I was so scared she might not recover. She is in remissions now which is absolutely fantastic. I think that possibly caused a lot of my worries. She is only 47 and we are so very close as is my whole family.

Just out of curiosity, how long were you fighting the panic/anxiety before you really felt better?

Thank you again x

Meg
27-05-04, 13:10
Purdy,

Crying is not stupid and you are not stupid. It is a release of emotional tension and thus don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Often I averted a panic by a good crying session - once I remembered how to cry !

Think you've answered your own leg question.

Not just focusing on tbe positives but the reasonable and rational too !! eg what about the mole looks suspicious, has it changed at all, is it bleeding. There are times when it is right and proper to go and get things checked out just ask yourself some basic questions before allowing yourself to go off on one.

Often it's helpful to ask yourslef what you would adcise a dear friend whos come to you with this problem.

Of course you are worried about Mum- anyone would be - it doesn't take an anxious person.

Everyone gets their panic and anxiety for their own reasons and recovery can be like a piece of string- whether the stressors are still present,how long its bene presnt and in what disguise, how much support you get, how soon you identify whats wrong etc so comparing any recovery path is simply not worth it and from my experience people automatically start to benchmark and get themselves upset if they don't measure up...







Meg

'There can only be true courage when first there is genuine fear'

Dr.David Livingstone

sarah
27-05-04, 13:30
Hi Purdy

I just wanted to give you a quick welcome to the site. I really hope we can be helpful to you.

Believe me you arent the only one why has called an ambulance, there are loads of us on here and I hold my hands up too (although it was my friend who called as she thought I was going mad...lol) so dont be embarrassed about that at all.

I know the feeling you had about staying in bed. Im glad you didnt though as I took that route and hid in bed for 2 weeks not eating/washing/talking and now nearly 2 years on im still fighting to gat back to a 'normal' life. Good on you for not giving in!

I have too felt that I want to get up and run round waving arms etc but even in the middle of a massive panic the worst ive ever done is sit there quietly shaking and mumbled that I have to leave so you arent alone there.

It seems like it has done you the world of good just writing this all down so feel free to post and let it all out whenever you need to!!!

take care
love Sarah
xx


we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Purdybird
27-05-04, 16:14
Thankyou for all your kind words. I know I can beat this, I think I'm just expecting an immediate overnight result.
It's hard to stay positive when I have successful days and then a sudden crappy day. I start doubting myself and thinking that perhaps I have really got a underlying serious illness or rare condition that the doctors struggle to diagnose, and I end up undoing all the previous good progress.

Please tell me that these minor blips are normal on the road to recovery. I have felt the panic creeping up on me a few times, but I have managed to control it so far. I guess, I'm just after some reassurance that I'm on the way to getting over this.

Thanks x

benoo5
27-05-04, 17:27
hi purdy,i just want to welcome you...i cant add to what meg,and sarah have said,there both great guys,and give good advice to everyone!

best wishes....bryan.

sarah
27-05-04, 17:47
hiya Purdy

Yes, definately normal to have 'blips'on the road to recovery. Thats why I think its such a cruel condition. You dont just get progressively better constantly, there are always little 'incidences' to put you back a step. The secret is to acknowledge them for what they are - minor blips/setbacks and pick yourself up and dust off and carry on. Once youve got that bit sussed I think you are on the road to recovery. (I still find it hard tho...it sets me off thinking the worst till I sort my head out again :)

take care
Love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

april tones
27-05-04, 18:10
hi, purdy, welcome to site, i agree with what brian said about sarah and megs advice being brill! i thought i would put my bit too. I feel and have felt the same as you. I have had panick attacks and depression in past but came back as pnd after birth of my little boy, I constantly worried about me and him getting ill, i was so scared of that fuji flu that was going around xmas, i was a reck, i couldnt read papers, watch news! Im doing all now, with support from fiance, this site and meds. I too developed phobia of taking meds and contraception. I took anti depressants in the end as i couldnt carry on any more and cryed for help. (literaly) They have helped so much. this is what they have helped me with.

1. my phobia of dying
2. not as scared of illnesses
3. dont obsess and worry bout my self and son that much.
4. i can read my tablet leaflet and not have panick attack and think im having the symptoms
5.Get through day without drea
ding doing all i have to do(somtimes i still get it)
6. Hardly have panic attacks,if i do i control them before get worse.

i hope this helps you knowing you will get there in end! if i can do it you can! i think im not completely covered yet and i still get unwanted thoughts but now i can sit back and look at what i have achieved, let us know your progress, take care, love april xx

apriltones

Tessie28
27-05-04, 20:01
Purdy,
think about taking the prozac - your doctor prescribed it with good reason to him/her. I swear by it and have never had any side effects [this panic thing does make you worry about that though. Try not to worry about your mum [been there, done that] I know it is easier said than done.

Everyone here is lovely and will be a good help to you,
take care,
Tess

me
30-05-04, 21:10
hello purdy x welcome to this wonderul site, as you can see its full of fab infomation and wonderful people who know what your going through.i have just read through your first message and its made me fill up because thats how i first felt when i started having panics in feb i thought i was going mad i thought i was dying at times every twinge i thought oh no ive got something really bad with me but 4 months later im feeling so so much better you sound like your doing all the right things, taking vitamins, seeing the doctor,finding this site which is really good x have you ever thought about seeing a counsellor? they really do help x i hope you are having a great bank holiday take care love from mary x

april tones
31-05-04, 09:11
hi mary, havent heard off you in ages. Glad to hear your doing well, take care, love april x

apriltones