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scarlettmary08
01-08-12, 15:55
Hi...after just coming back from yet another trip to Gp, my doc advised me to join a site to see that others do actually suffer from what I do..I have always thought I was alone in this.
I will try to keep it short although I do tend to ramble!
It all started 7 yrs ago..2 traumas on the same day..I had an ectopic pregnancy which luckily was treated with methotrexate ( a chemo drug apparently), and my brother, who lived 80 miles away, had a heart attack at 36..luckily we were both okay.
From that day, my life changed for the worst and in the 7 yrs since I feel as if I have aged 40 yrs..I am 47 now. Here's a list of symptoms I started to get over the next few weeks..nausea, pain in every joint and muscle in my body, ibs, itchy skin, pins and needles in hands, dizziness, bloating, anxiety, panic attacks, weakness, sleep disorders, skin rashes, hot flushes..the list goes on. After numerous trips to Gp..19 in the month of March!..and after numerous scans and blood tests nothing was found. I still didnt have a label for this illness and I needed one. Eventually I saw a Rheumatologist and was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Hooray..at last..but it got even worse. Any new symptoms I got after that I was convinced I had cancer of it..a flea bite on the leg was skin cancer, a cough that lasted was lung cancer, a swallowing problem was throat cancer..you get my drift. I had Cognitive behaviour therapy in a group session but it didnt help..I was more worried about a 15 yr old self-harming! I was put on Amitriptyline..again didnt help. Over the years it has got worse..my cancer fear. I am not scared of dying..just of dying of cancer. There are theories that it was caused by the chemo drug I had for my ectopic pregnancy, or for the 2 traumas in 1 day, or for the fact I was a nurse at 17 and saw a lot of cancer related deaths...who knows..I just want to get rid of this fear once and for all. My doc has promised we will do it..probably sick of me going there!.I have been put on a new drug..Duloxetine..it helps with my Fibromyalgia pain and supposed to help with my fears..will start them tonight.I am also starting therapy in a few weeks..one to one this time. I have a wonderful family..great husband and kids and am very happy otherwise but this is killing me and ruining my life.
I would be very grateful, if any of you also have this cancer fear, you would be willing to share your story.
Thanks in advance..has helped a bit already..just writing it all down xx:)

nomorepanic
01-08-12, 16:06
Hi scarlettmary08

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

swgrl09
01-08-12, 16:08
Hi, I have a fear of cancer too. Mine got way worse once my mom died of cancer a year and a half ago. It is so difficult, and I understand all the symptoms you described, esp the pains. My muscles in my neck, back, stomach, feels like everywhere really have gotten so tense and painful and I believe it is all related to this fear/anxiety about it.

Welcome, you'll find a lot of good people here! :)

scarlettmary08
01-08-12, 16:13
Thank you to Admin for welcoming me..I really feel this site could help..

Thanks to swgrl09..so sorry to hear about your Mum..thank you for your story and support x

R.Barratt
01-08-12, 19:44
hello :)
welcome to nmp xxx