Gale2509
03-08-12, 23:58
Haven't been on since January, things seemed to be getting better, good days and really, really bad days but not the horrendous never ending downward spirals of anxiety like I had last year. I am a long time 20+ years sufferer of HA, emetophobia (fear of being sick) And really severe panic attacks too. Anyway, as I said I really was feeling like I was beginning to see a little glimpse of light at the end of this very dark tunnel until......We've booked to go home (uk) for 3 weeks leaving next Friday, I currently live in the middle east, posted here with husbands job, I hate flying so that's problem number 1. The other problems centre around the countless viruses the kids and I are likely to contract on the plane, then to really finish me off, my mum called me this eve to make sure the children and I were fully upto date on whooping cough vaccines as there have been a lot of cases reported locally at home. Came on here to post, was reading a couple of other threads, one relating to a bowel issue, quite a few posts mentioned 'a bug' going round in the uk this is my number 1 phobia. I just feel exhausted already by the sheer overwhelming amount of anxiety I'm subjecting myself too. I just feel like I can't go backwards, I know how dark and terrifying it is to be so consumed with worry. Why can I not just be rational, reason with myself? Instead I'm 4 nights into no sleep, it's 2am here and my baby will be awake within 3 hours, all my digestive issues have flared up, which makes me think I've contracted some terrible disease or worse! I just wish I knew how to live a life with these issues, I can't keep literally falling off the bandwagon and into despair every time anything happens or changes in my life or I will never ever enjoy anything. Any advice out there?