I'm extremely lonely V_V

[meganmuffinsxox]

Well, i havn't been out having fun n shiz in a LONG time, i have no contact with my very limited amount of 'friends' & the last time this happened i resorted to overdoses, cutting etc to fill that gap..

well it's beginning to become a bit too much again, sitting in this room alone, every day :weep:

And now that i'm suffering with anxiety now, it's hard dealing with it alone :c

I don't know what i'm expecting from people but just wanted to let that out ;C

[Annie0904]

Its good for you, to share how you are feeling. you are not alone in these feelings and it will get better, it is just hard to see that at the moment. You need to try to do something to distract you from how you are feeling. Watch a movie (I suggest a comedy!) Go out for a walk? :hugs:

[meganmuffinsxox]

i watch movies, music, games, etc all day :C
I've learnt guitar to try gimme something to do, but meh, idk, i just still feel it :C
and my 'alone' feeling has just skyrocketed since realising panic attacks are now becoming a daily thing & no-one's here for me :C

& i would, but idk, i live in a fairly rough-ish area, isn't really anywhere to go, but i always feel weird when going for walks, even with the dog, i always feel (only when im alone), that people are staring at me, everyone, all thinking bad things of me :c

idk why i think that, but i just do, & if anyone talks, i assume it's about me & get clammy & nervous & just plain weird :C

Also, i even used to go all clammy & weird & shaky, even just escaping the house for 10mins to go for a smoke/really short walk D:

---------- Post added at 12:20 ---------- Previous post was at 12:16 ----------

also, i have 'friends' but they've 100% lost interest, i told one of my "friends" yesterday about my appointment cause he noticed i looked... off, & all he had to say was 'might come see you tommorrow", but i know for a fact he wont, everyone always says that... i always wonder what's wrong with me as well ;/

one of the reasons im OBSESSED with my appearance ;/

btw i wasnt out with him, i just went food shopping with my dad & saw him.. ;/

[Annie0904]

Feeling like everyone is looking at you and talking about you is a common problem but we just 'think' that, in reality they are not. have you had counselling? I think it would help you to think more positively about yourself. Your doctor can refer you. :hugs:

[meganmuffinsxox]

it's quite bad, & i used to have it a lot worse than i do now, my face used to be on fire when people talked to me that i didn't know too well... and gaaah, i've had couselling before about self-harm... but i dunno, i don't like to tell parents or anyone about how just, awkward i feel around people >___<

---------- Post added at 12:58 ---------- Previous post was at 12:56 ----------

nd oh god, so lonely :weep: i mean, i make obsessive lists about makeup & clothes & just generally, my appearance, n i try to be nice as possible :C don't understand why everyone's just, gone off me :{

[Annie0904]

Cognitive behaviour therapy might be better for you than counselling? Ask your GP about it. Keep talking to people on here, it will take some of your lonely feelings away and you are talking to people who understand.

[meganmuffinsxox]

i might do :C & yeah it does help to talk to people who understand :)

---------- Post added at 17:03 ---------- Previous post was at 13:17 ----------

meh ;c im dying of lonlyness ;C

[Mr Brownstone]

How are you getting on with the guitar? Its sooo hard. Maybe im just a doofus. Gave up a long time ago !

[london]

theres a chat room if you are
god bless

[paulie_b]

I honestly feel your pain. I recently moved to a new area for work, know absolutely no-one, and live by myself. I honestly think it's added to my GAD.

[meganmuffinsxox]

How are you getting on with the guitar? Its sooo hard. Maybe im just a doofus. Gave up a long time ago !
good thanks! :D ive learnt all my chords & one song so far :D n aww, its painful at first n a bit frustrating but you shouldnt have gave up! :C

---------- Post added at 14:49 ---------- Previous post was at 14:48 ----------


How are you getting on with the guitar? Its sooo hard. Maybe im just a doofus. Gave up a long time ago !
and want me to help you with it?:D idk how, but if you can think of how i could help you, maybe with video's or sumthing i will? :D

---------- Post added at 14:50 ---------- Previous post was at 14:49 ----------


I honestly feel your pain. I recently moved to a new area for work, know absolutely no-one, and live by myself. I honestly think it's added to my GAD.
gah, i got friends n stuff n a amazing bf n that, then social services moved me here, i was very popular but now friends have no interest in me ;/ in a months time, ill be moving yet again... ;/

---------- Post added at 14:51 ---------- Previous post was at 14:50 ----------


I honestly feel your pain. I recently moved to a new area for work, know absolutely no-one, and live by myself. I honestly think it's added to my GAD.
n i understand, its HORRIBLE having not one person to even just sit down & have a little chat with, & having yourself for company only :C just try to think, things will get better though, thats what i attempt thinking
good luck :)

[Christoff]

Hi megan. You're in a pretty s**t place at the minute. I come and go to that place myself, usually with alcohol and class A's.
You say you went shopping with your dad? Does he know about your problems? I didn't tell my parents for years about my issues because I was so embarrassed about them but I'm glad i did eventually. When I'm getting it really tight now I can always just go and sit with them and it does help, even if I know my dad doesn't understand and finds it awkward to talk about it, it helps just being there.
Maybe you should try spending more time with him and the rest of your family?

[theharvestmouse]

I get lonely, I pushed friends away, some don't understand my problems, its difficult sometimes to spend so much time alone. I should be doing things to meet new friends but the motivation is not there.

Know how you feel Megan.

[meganmuffinsxox]

Hi megan. You're in a pretty s**t place at the minute. I come and go to that place myself, usually with alcohol and class A's.
You say you went shopping with your dad? Does he know about your problems? I didn't tell my parents for years about my issues because I was so embarrassed about them but I'm glad i did eventually. When I'm getting it really tight now I can always just go and sit with them and it does help, even if I know my dad doesn't understand and finds it awkward to talk about it, it helps just being there.
Maybe you should try spending more time with him and the rest of your family?
I am. But it's nothing compared to what's gonna come in a couple of weeks, my dad's leaving the country, and I'm going back to hell-hole Darlington to give things another go with my mum and stepdad... I'm unbeleivably sacred, in fact, i cant talk about it anymore, in tears already... and my dad knows i WAS depressed and he spent a little time with me when my liver was recovering in hospital from overdoses... he doesn't know how much im still struggling though, he doesn't know it all seems to be coming back </3 and i just cant, tell him </3

---------- Post added at 17:05 ---------- Previous post was at 17:04 ----------


I get lonely, I pushed friends away, some don't understand my problems, its difficult sometimes to spend so much time alone. I should be doing things to meet new friends but the motivation is not there.

Know how you feel Megan.
Ive pushed ALL my friends away, i have none now, but I feel I will benefit from this later on.. when I have to... start again, again...

---------- Post added at 17:09 ---------- Previous post was at 17:05 ----------

and im struggling with extremely strong suicidal thoughts at the moment, (i have posted in depression part of the forum)
Im ****in' petrified.

[Christoff]

I'm sorry so much crap is happening around you megan. If going back to your mum and stepdad is freaking you out that much maybe it's not such a good idea. Obviously I dont know about the history.
I think you have to tell your dad megan. I read you said you pushed all your friends away but you really need someone around you. Are there support groups or anything near you?

[meganmuffinsxox]

I'm sorry so much crap is happening around you megan. If going back to your mum and stepdad is freaking you out that much maybe it's not such a good idea. Obviously I dont know about the history.
I think you have to tell your dad megan. I read you said you pushed all your friends away but you really need someone around you. Are there support groups or anything near you?
I'm nervous as ****, but i think i need to give it another go, me and my mum would both hate for me to be in care again, and we've always been close so we need to at least try to repair the relationship, gonna be hard, but we're gonna try...

and what's it gonna do? apart from stress him out? ;/ and your right i do need someone around me but i don't know how to fix that... and i dont know

[Fay_elizabeth]

I can totally relate to the loneliness and the thinking everyone is looking at you or talking about you. I moved to London about 6 months ago with my boyfriend, he has a pretty demanding job and is often out of the house so I get really lonely. I have no friends here either and no money so I can't go shopping or to the zoo to cheer myself up :(

It sounds like you've been through some pretty rough times and I feel like you would really benefit from having someone close. I know I wish I had someone else I could talk to. My boyfriend is embarrassed about me and doesn't really understand. I'm considering counselling but the description in the leaflet that my doctor gave me put me off, it says "You do all the talking" but I hate talking to strangers, I'm frightened it'll just be awkward.

[Buspass5]

I also recognise the serious & sad problem of loneliness. I was a happy child & teenager until the age of 17 or 18 when I suddenly started to become withdrawn & had a huge loss of self confidence, which made me a social cripple. I used to work in a job where I had little or no contact with other people (as I had & still have a bad social phobia). The job paid peanuts yet I had a university education & a degree. After work I would buy some strong beer to block out my fears & anxiety, sleep & this treadmill went on for over a decade or more. I finally met someone & got married, and my wife understood my severe social problems. I still have the same phobia today masked by prescription medicine, though I have no true friends (apart from my wife & son). I mix ok at work & other situations but am not close enough to anyone to phone them up for help or advice or even a general chit chat.
Sadly I have come to accept that that's the way I am and I'm living to the best of my ability with my 'little problems'. However I always recognise that I am not alone & there are millions of people with a lot worse problems than mine. I can afford to eat & drink, keep a roof over my head & can afford some luxuries. If I can't make friends then so be it, just always remember there are many many others with bigger problems than mine. I've known 3 work colleagues die over the last 5 years who were completely healthy on the outside & suddenly passed away at a young age with cancer & a heart attack. I'm still here, take my tablets, smile & carry on. Only I know how deep my anxieties are but it could easily be a lot lot worse so I make the most of my limited & restricted world.

[psbsup]

Also diagnosed with GAD/social phobia. It sucks as it has made it difficult for me to have relationships. Had a gf who wanted me to move in with her....but I did not do it. She wanted to have babies very badly and I recently lost my job. So I told her I didn't want kids and she ended the relationship. Extremely lonely ever since.....

[meganmuffinsxox]

I can totally relate to the loneliness and the thinking everyone is looking at you or talking about you. I moved to London about 6 months ago with my boyfriend, he has a pretty demanding job and is often out of the house so I get really lonely. I have no friends here either and no money so I can't go shopping or to the zoo to cheer myself up :(

It sounds like you've been through some pretty rough times and I feel like you would really benefit from having someone close. I know I wish I had someone else I could talk to. My boyfriend is embarrassed about me and doesn't really understand. I'm considering counselling but the description in the leaflet that my doctor gave me put me off, it says "You do all the talking" but I hate talking to strangers, I'm frightened it'll just be awkward.
yeah, i wake up alone, sit here in this room all day and night, alone, in fact, you could say im mute, i guess. havnt had anyone here to say a word to for ages. and having someone here, isnt an option... and **** getting close to anybody when im back at school for a week or two. becasue ill be there literally, a week or two.

---------- Post added at 19:52 ---------- Previous post was at 19:51 ----------


Also diagnosed with GAD/social phobia. It sucks as it has made it difficult for me to have relationships. Had a gf who wanted me to move in with her....but I did not do it. She wanted to have babies very badly and I recently lost my job. So I told her I didn't want kids and she ended the relationship. Extremely lonely ever since.....
and aww. im sorry thing's arn't great :C

[Mr Brownstone]

Megan, its probably not much use to at this precise minute, but life will get better. Not sure what age you are, but once you get a job you'll be able to live somewhere else, somewhere of your choice. You'll get all your own stuff, and not feel cooped up in your room. At your age, life can change beyond recognition in a short space of time. Keep your chin up hun x

[chuckiesback]

hope you feel better soon xxx

[saintdee]

Feel free to message me if you ever want some outside contact. I don't go out either

[meganmuffinsxox]

Megan, its probably not much use to at this precise minute, but life will get better. Not sure what age you are, but once you get a job you'll be able to live somewhere else, somewhere of your choice. You'll get all your own stuff, and not feel cooped up in your room. At your age, life can change beyond recognition in a short space of time. Keep your chin up hun x
i am going to look for a job once ive moved again, in 2 weeks or w.e. i really doubt ill be able to get one though.
x

---------- Post added at 20:04 ---------- Previous post was at 20:03 ----------


hope you feel better soon xxx
thankyou :C
x

[Queey]

Well, i havn't been out having fun n shiz in a LONG time, i have no contact with my very limited amount of 'friends' & the last time this happened i resorted to overdoses, cutting etc to fill that gap..

well it's beginning to become a bit too much again, sitting in this room alone, every day :weep:

And now that i'm suffering with anxiety now, it's hard dealing with it alone :c

I don't know what i'm expecting from people but just wanted to let that out ;C

There are lots of people here to help.i find talking makes your problems shared so if you want to talk I'm here?

[haduken]

Cognitive behaviour therapy might be better for you than counselling? Ask your GP about it. Keep talking to people on here, it will take some of your lonely feelings away and you are talking to people who understand.
hey this is what i have to do in November my psychologist put me in her program she just diagnosed with bpd.. overdoses and cutting are soo lethal i have the battle scars and unfortunately for me i ended up with chronic pancreatitis and nasty looking arms from 20 years of self destruction.. im turning 26 next month and im hoping i got another 20 in me.. stay focussed though we have to keep going..