Going backwards?

[Tessie28]

Hi again everyone,
had a bad day yesterday. [V] Went to the dentist to have two teeth filled. Normally nervous but okay - yesterday heart banging so loud i thought he might hear it [:0]sweating, shaky etc. Did explain a bit to him and he was very good with me but felt an idiot[:I]. Then had to drive back from the garage [as passenger of course] in son's brand new car with him pretending i wasn't nervous[:0].
Worst i have felt in weeks today - such a nervous wreak about him driving on his own [recently passed test but 20 years old]. He is out at present and i keep looking out the window etc.
Firstly - am i going backwards[?]
secondly [anyone with any experience of child driving thing] is this a normal reaction just worse because of the panics[?]
hope everyone else is okay
love tess

[pauline]

Hi Tess

I hear ya and so understand where your coming from. That was me 3 years ago and i can still remember how i felt when my son now 23 passed his test. The nights i did not sleep ( well don't sleep well at all) but it was far worse waiting for him to come home. He used to drive so fast and when i had had a lift of him i was a nervous wreak more than usually[:I] Anyway 3 years have flown by no accidents. He has grown up and doe snot drive fast now well not as far as i know[:I] Now i have it all over again as 18 son is having driving lessons soon sure you will understand me when i say that i'm kind of glab its a car as not long ago it was going to be a moter bike:( Oh the things that were going through my mind then. Having anxiety does not help as we lot tend to go into over drive thinking all sorts but honestly talk to any mums and they will have worries just the same. Hang in there it does get better.

Take care
Pauline

[Meg]

Hi Tess,

It's usual to have exacerbated feelings that escalate to fear quickly when it used to be nerves only .
It's fueled by fear of the fear, but mostly because our nervous systems go from green to red alert much quicker and for less reaosn when its tired and been used to extreme recently.



Meg

'There can only be true courage when first there is genuine fear'

Dr.David Livingstone

[Tessie28]

Thanks Meg and Pauline,

feeling better now than first thing. Plus Dudley has gone off on his first pass plus lesson which should help his confidence and mine:D. I think feeling so tired still doesn't help. Still don't sleep more than a couple of hours at a time. Could be the panics or could just be this damn plaster it is hard to tell.[|)]
love tess

[april tones]

hi tess, i think its quite normal to worry any way as i worrry about my son too. When he went out with his granparents at xmas, he was late and i kept checking through window, think its just normal reaction. What ever our children do we will worry, its parents instinct, im sure he will be fine, he sounds like sensible driver, love april x

apriltones

[Tessie28]

Hi April,
yes who would be a parent[?]. I remember thinking 'oh once this stage is over it'll be better' and that was about sleeping through the night :D:D. I think the panics just seem to make everything worse[V].
love Tess

[stimpy]

I think everyone has days when they feel they are going backwards.
I think it is our brains way of telling us to slow down and relax a little bit.

I sit in the car with my eyes shut as I can't watch traffic passing us, crossing us or getting to near. Watching people cross the road really sets me off.

Try not to worry too much, easier said than done, but I think as parents we do have a habbit of over worrying about everything.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

[Tessie28]

Liz,
i'm starting to worry about the image of you in your car with your eyes closed - you don't mean when you are driving i hope :D

Still feel funny but being so tired can't help[|)]. Will start my reports to keep myself busy today and having reflexology tomorrow,
love tess

[stimpy]

You will be pleased to know I can't drive, so I always sit in the passenger seat, so there is no need to panic Tess, you can relax. :D

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

[Tessie28]

Hi everyone,
still on a downward slide and feeling worse than i have in weeks. Any words of comfort[?]
love tess

[kate]

Hiya Tess,

Sorry to hear that you are feeling so low at the moment.

I think that the one thing that is certain with anxiety/panic is that the recovery process is constantly being tested by the 2 steps forward, 3 steps back scenario.

One minute you can feel on top of the world, having had a good day, the next minute feeling that you are just running on the spot.

Over the Christmas period, I was feeling so low that I thought I would never pull myself back up ever again.

These feelings lasted well into the New Year. Then, shortly afterwards, I woke up one morning and felt the cloud lifting slightly.

I still suffer constant anxiety but can cope with it by just going with it, doing what I can and ignoring the rest!

This downward slide WILL pass, Tess, and you will start to feel more able to cope, though I am well aware how hard it is to deal with it at the time.

In the meantime, be kind to yourself. Give yourself some small treat during the day. Use your best bubble bath, perfume, anything that lifts you up a bit.

Look back on the positives, the things you have achieved over the past few months.

My psychologist told me to buy myself a "well done" card, praising myself for any little thing I had done.

I wrote in this, congratulating myself on all my achievements in life.

Tess, you will get through this, and we will all be here to help you in any way we can.

Take care and keep posting

Kate x

[april tones]

hi liz, sorry to hear your feeling down, we all go through it like kate said. I had it last week. Feeling better now and you will to. Have you got support at home? love april x

apriltones

[stimpy]

Hi Tess,

Hang in there and keep being positive.
You will start going forwards again, it just takes time that's all.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'