jonngait
18-08-12, 20:46
Hello everybody! My name is John and I'm 21 years old. I've been diagnosed with Anxiety Disorder for more than 6 years and lately I have done a great progress. All by myself, that is (and taking some tips from this wonderful website and its users!) as in my country -Greece that is- it's impossible to have some decent psychiatric medical attention for free.. and I can't afford 50 euros/per hour to visit a doctor on my own. Now, here comes the tough part.
Even though I have managed to beat many of my fears, there is one certain phobia that I simply can not get rid of. I'll let you all in with a quick story... I have always been afraid of heights... not too much, I guess just as much as the next guy.. for example, I remember myself struggling to go at the 10th floor of a building, but I managed to did it anyhow.. Well, one day, I was at my university, and I took the elevator to the 6th floor. When I got there, I had the clever idea to look down from a window and.... Voila, there I was, running down all those floors, without a single breath!
Since then, I haven't been able to go back to that 6th floor (or any floor higher than 4th in any other building, that is)... but what most troubles me is *that* certain floor.. you see, in less than 2 weeks I'm having an oral examination which takes place at that bloody floor!!! I cringe even at the mere thought of myself going up there... It's like, when I'm up there, I feel like the building is gonna take off and get lost into space, and I can do nothing because the exit is so far far below.... It's stupid, I know, but no matter how redundant the cause is, I simply can not bare to go up there again.
I have been trying to find a logical cause, and I guess I have done some progress on that... I have come to the conclusion that I'm having this irrational fear just to sabotage my own happiness -subconsiously... by ruining my chances to get my diploma, I'm doomed into misery, and that's a good turn-out for that self-hating part of myself. Anyway, I'm gonna work on that part on myself.... but I do need help on something else..
And that is the reason I'm writing these lines!! Has anyone of you experienced something like I have? How did you cope with it? What did you do to get over it? Your thoughts and experiences are truely valuable to me, as my test is in less than 2 weeks and I'm desperate...! I just can't bare the thought of losing that test, and failing -yet again- to be a bigger man than my own fears.... please help me!!!!!
Even though I have managed to beat many of my fears, there is one certain phobia that I simply can not get rid of. I'll let you all in with a quick story... I have always been afraid of heights... not too much, I guess just as much as the next guy.. for example, I remember myself struggling to go at the 10th floor of a building, but I managed to did it anyhow.. Well, one day, I was at my university, and I took the elevator to the 6th floor. When I got there, I had the clever idea to look down from a window and.... Voila, there I was, running down all those floors, without a single breath!
Since then, I haven't been able to go back to that 6th floor (or any floor higher than 4th in any other building, that is)... but what most troubles me is *that* certain floor.. you see, in less than 2 weeks I'm having an oral examination which takes place at that bloody floor!!! I cringe even at the mere thought of myself going up there... It's like, when I'm up there, I feel like the building is gonna take off and get lost into space, and I can do nothing because the exit is so far far below.... It's stupid, I know, but no matter how redundant the cause is, I simply can not bare to go up there again.
I have been trying to find a logical cause, and I guess I have done some progress on that... I have come to the conclusion that I'm having this irrational fear just to sabotage my own happiness -subconsiously... by ruining my chances to get my diploma, I'm doomed into misery, and that's a good turn-out for that self-hating part of myself. Anyway, I'm gonna work on that part on myself.... but I do need help on something else..
And that is the reason I'm writing these lines!! Has anyone of you experienced something like I have? How did you cope with it? What did you do to get over it? Your thoughts and experiences are truely valuable to me, as my test is in less than 2 weeks and I'm desperate...! I just can't bare the thought of losing that test, and failing -yet again- to be a bigger man than my own fears.... please help me!!!!!