Fear of 'trapped' situations

[phoebe]

Hi everyone :)

I had a panic attack at the hairdressers about 8 weeks ago, this has left me with a fear of having another one in any situation I feel I can't escape from discreetly, for example the hairdressers, dentist, optician, doctors (although I did manage to stay even though I felt weird when I had an appointment last week), job interviews, vets (our cat was poorly a couple of weeks ago so my other half had to take her).

Any advice would be so welcome as more then anything I want to get past this and I'm feeling soooooo frustrated with this as I know it will never get better if I don't just do these things.

The hairdresser wasn't aware I was having a panic attack and I don't believe I embarrased myself but even so I'm very scared of it happening again to the point I couldn't even step foot inside the hairdressers to have my fringe cut a few weeks ago (this has resulted in me cutting my fringe myself, badly! :winks:)

Any tips or advice would be extremely welcome. Thanks for reading.

Phoebs x

[PanchoGoz]

Hair dressers get this a lot. Some people just feel they cannot stay in that chair the whole time.
Know that the only thing you fear is having the fear itself, and if you can practise managing a panic attack, and master it throughly, you need not fear these situations.

Most of the unpleasant flight or fight sensations you have is actually you fighting against it. If you let the fear come and welcome it, you are letting it go. Acceptance is the key.

Let your muscles relax, allow yourself to breathe by relaxing your belly as if you've just undone your belt after a big meal. Smile a bit, unclench your fists and they will stop sweating. Be aware of your heartbeat and breathing and watch it coming down in speed as you relax. Rate the anxiety as it goes up and down.
Panic comes in waves, it can help to visualise yourself riding on them, surfing them. It can do you no harm, it is only fear and fight or flight.
Keep grounded with your environment to, distract yourself with a magazine or watch what the hairdresser is doing in the mirror.

Once you know how to deal with an attack, you needn't fear them. Don't limit yourself in what you do, don't be careful with yourself. Go on with life as normal.

[MiniatureDisasters]

I get this too, particularly in restaurants. I think a big part of overcoming the problem is getting over the fear of prospective embarrassment, as really that's what's trapping you in the situation. If beforehand you give yourself permission to just leave if you need to, it removes the "trap" and you'll probably be fine / can concentrate on getting through the panic attack instead of worrying what other people think.

I had this a few months ago in a restaurant. I just had to leave and sit outside for the next couple of hours while people finished their meal. :yesyes: :doh:

In the end I wasn't embarrassed as it was what it was and what other people think really doesn't matter. However, people are more understanding and familiar with panic attacks than you might think, so if you explained the situation directly to them that might help. Also, try remembering all the previous situations where you have managed to get through a panic. The more you do it the easier it will get.

[Mackayfire]

I know exactly how you feel, I used to be exactly the same! The way I used to cope was to visualise the whole appointment/dinner etc beforehand and imagine it going great and not let any negative anxiety/anticipation seep in. Easy said than done but eventually the worry just stopped altogether.

Before this though I too would just try and convince myself I was never really trapped. I'd think of lies to escape with like needing the toilet or coughing or something and just knowing those 'outs' were an option made me feel much better.

Pancho has the best idea though - don't fear the fear. Or just tell the hairdresser or whoever you are feeling nervous. That way the pressure to act normal is removed and people can be very understanding and grateful you shared.