Thought I was doing OK, but I'm not :-(

[Anxiety Jim]

Hi,

I haven't been on here since Friday I think, or possibly Saturday morning, and I thought I'd made a miraculous recovery after 2 or 3 weeks or utter panic. But alas I have not, I went to my sisters wedding yesterday and I managed to calm my self down from 3 or 4 panic attacks before they fully got going. And I only thought I was going to die a few times, and generally it was the least anxious day I've had for 3 weeks.

But today I've gone back into full blown panic mode, all of my cancer and DVT fears are back, I've been trying everything to calm myself down, from trying to concentrate of TV or a video game, to sitting in silence concentrating on breathing, to going for a walk, but nothing is working.

I'm certain I've not got long left again, and it's so scary because there's so much I want to do with my life. And I'm scared when I go back to see my GP on Thursday he's going to drop a bombshell about a possible serious cause for my low calcium levels.

I wish there was something I could do that would mean I knew I was OK, and then I could get back to trying to enjoy my life and make something of it.

:-(

[little.miss.worry]

Try to find the rout of your problem..is their any reason for you to think that you may have cancer? even if you have some symptoms that you think point to cancer..it wont be! and whatever you do..please do not google! because even if you typed into google "I have a cut on my finger" every web page will basically say your'e going to die from it and we all no that wouldn't happen!
And about this low calcium level, everything will be okay, don't expect the worst! their is also something you can do..tomorrow morning wake up with a positive attitude go out, do something fun! :)

[Anxious_gal]

Do you think if you had the relevant tests done and they were clear, would you accept you're not sick or would you be in fear that they missed something?

Without therapy I fear you might jump from one illness to the next.
Tests can't diagnoise everything and you may become sick later on in life.

Most of us have been sick before, a lot too would have operations for various things like gall stones or sinus polyps or whatever.
I worry without help if you ever get sick in the future you might blow the littlest things out of propertion.

If you worry so much about low calcium levels, you could get worked up and anxious over any little thing. But to you it's not little, you almost have an over active imagination.
CBT can help change how you view things, how you react, how you cope.
When you start fearing the worst you need to learn how to calm down and be rational .

But when symptoms are real, and with too much medical info online I understand it can be hard to tell if you're overreacting or not.

I do get the fear, I do understand the feeling of helplessness because you fear you are dying and no one seems to understand the urgency, to be tested and treated before its all too late .

Well done on going to the wedding :) you should feel proud of that.

Listen to people here as they are the voice of reason :p

Don't take it personally if you get less replies, it's just I guess people don't always have any new adivce to offer n they'd just be repeating themselves .

We can't help you, we can try to reasure you and sympathise, but you need to get some extra help and support for yourself in your life too :)

[Louise36]

I totally agree with anxious gal. I've Been there and still am sometimes. I also have a v overactive imagination and I can sit and think of an illness I might have and then go from that to planning my funeral... I know it feels hopeless and u feel like no one is taking you seriously, but do you really think a doctor would chance litigation these days? So if they had the tiniest thought that there could be something wrong with you, they would have referred you. You are not alone and we have all been where you are now, cbt can help, I've been having it for yrs on and off. I think you should go back to your docs and tell them exactly how you feel, how worried you are etc. Do not hide your feelings as they won't then know who debilitating this is for you. Take care. Louise.