lg123
04-09-12, 11:01
I've been up and down with anxiety for the last few months and it has evolved and changed. But at the moment I feel scared of doing everything - from getting out of bed, to leaving the house, to going to the doctor, shopping, socialising - everything. Everything has become so much more difficult and less enjoyable because I fear it. I have intrusive thoughts centred around harm, which doesn't help. Just looking at what I have to do today and tomorrow - go to the dentist, go to the bank, go shopping, go to the library, meet up with my HR manager to discuss going back to work - all of this freaks me out. I'm on my own the moment and even seeing people scares me. Even fun stuff like going to the cinema is not something I look forward to anymore. These are all things I wouldn't have given a second thought to pre anxiety but now they seem so much more challenging. I have been trying to feel the fear and do it anyway but the fear doesn't seem to be easing off. It's not even like I have a safe place - I can feel scared in my own house. I'm on 20mg citlalopram and I'm seeing a psychodynamic therapist plus trying to work through CBT as well as eating very healthily, taking Omega 3, B vitamins and exercising. I feel like I've made so much progress with so many of my negative thinking patterns but this fear just won't go away.