Is this a suicidal thought

[xtremx]

I am not used to having suicidal thoughts but over the last year or so I sometimes fear walking over bridges because when i look over i sometimes get a felling into my head what it would be like to go over the edge.
And also lately I find sometimes when I stop at the road to cross I find myself taking a few extra steps away from the kerb incase i step out in front of a car.

Strange feelings but I should know I am to much of a coward to kill myself (hopefully what i just said will not offened anyone). As I find sometimes that i over think things and then that puts doubts into my mind and it sometimes drives me crazy.

Could this just be a case of something like Vertigo if you now what i mean ie bridges over water and cars wizzing past changing my perception off thing because of changes in wind pressure. That was a mouthfull to type

[mikewales]

Its not a suicidal thought, this is actually quite common and people can get it on bridges, tall buildings, mountains etc... not sure why, but I suppose its the same sort of reason makes some people enjoy parachuting, bungee jumping and abseiling.

[OliviaD]

Some years ago I had similar thoughts (if I understand you correctly)... I was afraid of high places, especially the windows of the first floor of my new house. I thought I'd feel the urge to fall down. Of course I never *actually* felt it, but I was afraid I would. I got over it after a while.

[shotokansho]

Hey I was the same once, sometimes it comes back for a short while. I actually started to avoid bridges because I was so afraid of going over. I also had the same experiences when I was on two cruise holidays. The ships are huge and I couldn't stand at the edge of the ship (even though they have barriers) to look at the sea because it scared me too much. I used to get a weird feeling of falling which gave me butterflies in my tummy, this confused me so much because I didn't know if the butterflies in my tummy were there because it was something I actually wanted to do.

[xtremx]

God help I can't do bridges at all now. The thing is the only way into my town is over a bloody bridge.

My legs go weak and I can't get across one because I am afraid of the feeling I get about climbing/jumping off.

[bignik]

try and think its only a thought , it sounds just like a thought , dont attach anything to it try let it slip bye

[PanchoGoz]

I am not used to having suicidal thoughts but over the last year or so I sometimes fear walking over bridges because when i look over i sometimes get a felling into my head what it would be like to go over the edge.
And also lately I find sometimes when I stop at the road to cross I find myself taking a few extra steps away from the kerb incase i step out in front of a car.

Strange feelings but I should know I am to much of a coward to kill myself (hopefully what i just said will not offened anyone). As I find sometimes that i over think things and then that puts doubts into my mind and it sometimes drives me crazy.

Could this just be a case of something like Vertigo if you now what i mean ie bridges over water and cars wizzing past changing my perception off thing because of changes in wind pressure. That was a mouthfull to type


The words in bold highlight the fact the thoughts are born from fear.

[lleksam]

The Doctor: There it is again. That itch. "Go down go down go down go down."

Ida: The urge to jump. Do you know where it comes from, that sensation? Genetic heritage. Ever since we were primates in the tress. It's our body's way of testing us. Calculating whether or not we can reach the next branch.

The Doctor: No, that's not it. That's too kind. It's not the urge to jump, it's deeper than that. It's the urge to fall!

[NoPoet]

Actually, this kind of thinking probably indicates a fear of death, which is totally different from suicidality.

Fearing that you might cause your own death probably comes about because your rational mind knows that your anxiety/depression/whatever is NOT going to kill you. So because you have this deep inner fear of death, you're probably thinking that you are going to bring about your own death.

Death is occupying your unconscious mind, and it's creating thoughts not to frighten you or encourage you, but it's because it knows the subject is so important to you. It's like a faithful dog: your deep fear is like a stick of dynamite which you chuck as far away from you as possible, and your subconscious does what any dog would do: it runs after it and brings it back!

Bear in mind that your core problems (like fear of death) generate and then hide behind a layer of crap (like fears of suicide) to distract you, because the core problems are so painful and devastating - at first - that they are difficult to face.

EDIT: This is why dealing with core fears is so essential. You can't just jump straight in there and do it, you have to gradually dismantle the fear. If you deal with your fear of suicide, you will still be afraid of death, so the fear of bridges etc may return. If you come to terms with your fear of death, there would be no reason to fear suicide, which in turn means there is no longer any reason to fear bridges or other situations that used to remind you of death/suicide. The whole gravy train crashes out of existence carriage by carriage, leaving you more time to concentrate on good things like going to Muse concerts :D.