Can't accept that I will die

[Em.ma]

I live in constant fear of death I really don't want to die im scared . I'll never wake again I'll never smel feel touch again ill be nothing no feelings no emotions I'll just be burnt not even here any more or rotting in the ground im absolutely terrified I don't believe in the after life or heaven etc..., I won't see anything what happens I don't want to die I realloy don't ... I have this immense fear of it

---------- Post added at 22:43 ---------- Previous post was at 22:42 ----------

The years go by so quick why can't it all just slow down and stop

[nomorepanic]

There is only one thing guaranteed in life and that is that we will all die at some point and we won't know anything about it.

All you can do Emma is spend your time living not spend it waiting to die

[lizzie29]

Hi Emma

This is a difficult one. Anxiety is normally based around what ifs which often don't come true, but obviously I can't say that regarding dying. No matter what you think, it will happen. You have to try to enjoy the life you have before that does happen. You cannot stop it.
I really think someone needs to do more to help you. Can you move to a different doctor? They seem to be ignoring you. You worry so much, and need some kind of therapy or cbt to help you. You're young and should be out enjoying life. You either need to be very forceful with your doctor or find a new one. It's not right,surely they can see how distressed you are. Are you completely honest with them? Maybe you could show them your posts on here, as it's sometimes difficult to say everything when you're there. X

[swgrl09]

Emma, I too have this fear. I can't remember if you have mentioned it, but have you experienced a death of a loved one? That's what triggered my intense fear of death. It is like it all of a sudden becomes real, whereas prior it was just this thing you knew would happen but didn't really worry about. I still struggle with it. Therapy and medication have helped a little, but it's still always there.

[Em.ma]

Thanks :) id like to know how people can not be scared? Thinkoing about it now I've always been scared even from a little girl about death and ive not even had anyone other than distant reletives die. No close family etc... Nicola not knowing is the worse it's hard to explain what scares me I guess that it's the fact that in thousands of years no one will even know I lived on this earth ... Also the fact that I'll never wake again etc... Do you ever feel like that ? Or does it not phase you at all ? Sometimes I wish I had a belief but I don't I can't believe in things like heaven and hell I think that would be a comfort... I just think you rot and that you never wake again you can't feel nothing... Lizzie I'm not even sure my doc gets it I had a few weeks of counselling at one point but didn't find it much use maybe because I was to closed off or had a closed up mind about it D wouldn't let it work

[nomorepanic]

I nearly died once Emma so it made me aware that we can all just be here one day and not the next. It does not worry me and I try to make the most of living now cos that is all I can do really.

[skw1208]

Hi Emma. Sorry to hear you are going through this. It can be totally debilitating if you allow the fear to take hold of your life. Don't let it - Nicola is right, you don't want to waste your life worrying about something you have absolutely no control over. I know it's easier Said than done which is why agree with what another previous poster said about seeking help.

I have a fear of dying also and have found CBT in conjunction with medication to treat anxiety/panic, successful.

I also found a resource on here that offered me a great deal of comfort when trying to accept/rationalise that I will die one day
@ http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/healthanxiety/

Most of the article deals with HA (and is also very helpful) but I would refer you Especially to the section at the end on fear of illness and dying. There is a great paragraph comparing death to birth and also death to falling asleep each night. Eg. Where do we 'go' when we sleep yet we are not afraid of it etc.

As terrifying as dying is, I find not living my life because of it far worse
Good luck and big hugs

[polly81]

Hi Emma,

I really feel for you right now, and I also can relate to this. What you have said is exactly how I too feel alot of the time. I am afraid to even sleep a lot of the time incase I don't wake up but I always do wake up. You can slow life down and try take in every second, minute etc and try get out and do productive things eveyday and you will start to really appreciate things and you will feel better. The thoughts you are having are not thoughts you need to be having, you shouldn't be consumed by these terrible thoughts. I am now on an antidepressant a few weeks and I am starting to feel a bit better. My thoughts aren't taking over as much and I am been more rational in my thoughts too as I suffer with health anxiety badly. I hope to get to do soem cognitive behavioural therapy too and I would recommend that you try that or the medication or both or at least go to your doctor and ask for more help as there is help out there and its not nice to live in fear.
Take care xxx

[Eek]

This is my big fear too. I have suffered HA on and off since my teens and I'm now 48. I find the older I get the more I fear death. My recent episode of HA and fear of dying was sparked off by the death of my dad and I ended up in a psychiatric hospital where I was put on anti depressants which have helped a bit with the HA. I would say that my HA is due entirely to my phobia of death, if I wasn't scared of dying I'd be fine and like you, Emma, I wish I believed in life after death it would be a comfort.

As has been said, it's the one certainty in life and there's nothing we can do to avoid it. I try hard to not waste the time I have left worrying about it but it's hard and it fuels my HA.

Sorry that I have nothing more helpful to say but I find it helps knowing that I am not alone in my fears, though I find it sad that others feel the same way I do as it sucks.

[dazzadoo123]

just wanted to say this is by big fear also...
i suffer from HA -depression and because i fear deth so much it fuels all my anxiety and depression ....
i no the fear of death is my biggest problem had it years ...
i no we should be just living and enjoying life as its gonna happen anyway to us but i cant get my head around it never have been able to ever....
i totaley understand where your all coming from x
daz...

[Lissa101]

Hi Emma, when I get scared about death I always think about this Mark Twain quote:

“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”

[Em.ma]

Thanks guys it's nice to know that I'm not crazy... Haha. At the moment royal mail have stopped the use of cars so my dad is forced to use a bike to go from his office to we're he starts the walk he won't wear the helmet and I'm terrified he'll hit his head n kill himself

---------- Post added at 18:13 ---------- Previous post was at 18:12 ----------

Lissa I've thought about that to and it does help a bit!!!

[LaceFace]

aww hon I know exactly where you're coming from. I have had this fear for so many years and I am just 29! I know it is silly but my mind goes irrational and at times I am afraid to go to sleep for fear I won't wake up. I am trying to just live life day to day and let whatever happens, happen. Try to distract yourself go out do activities, etc. Things like that are beyond our control and yes, it is a scary thought. You are def. not alone and I'm sending BIG hugs your way! :hugs:

[loopylu86]

I think everyone fears death just it's how you chose to deal with the fear. I have faith and that is the one thing that comforts me. Also and this is something I neevr discuss because people never understand but after my dad passed away when I was 18 about 4 years later my sister and I out of the blue decided to visit a clairvoyant...The things this lady revealed were mind blowing. She knew EVERYTHING. Not just skimming over the obvious. The detail and depth of it was beyond. She knew things that we didn't even know and asking our mum later revealed they were infact true. These were not things that she could of known. I have no doubt that there is an afterlife. Faith is a beautiful thing and maybe if you could find some you might feel more at peace. You really shouldn't waste life questioning it. Just live it! You will leave your mark in many ways. It will pass down through the generations. We are all going there. We are all in it together! You won't feel so intense about this forever. But just know that death is something everyone fears.

[Pacific]

^^ Loopy you said it beautifully, couldn't have said it better

[willous1]

Ultimately, this is the reason health anxiety attacks us so bad. Death. Sometimes I have a panic attack like feeling and have to get up and do stuff in the middle of the night because of thinking of this fear. Its horrible and not fair. Whats the point when were nothing.

[cassy1989]

I used to be terrified of dying but when my aunty died in april I gained a whole new perspective. I know you say you don't believe in the after life and neither did I but seeing my aunty laying in intensive care and willing her to get better I some how already knew she had left her body and that wasn't her any more. I really can't explain it.
I have never been religious but I genuinely believe that when we die our spirits leave our bodies and our bodies are just shells.
This probably doesn't help you but it has helped me and as others have said there is nothing else guaranteed for us other then death so just live your life to the full xx

[Em.ma]

thanks
guys having a hard time today
last week hit top of head on car door today hit side of head on metal clothes railing
i always think well did i know before i was born? it helps a bit but i still feel really panicky
something is telling me i will die tonight i feel so ill :( x

---------- Post added at 18:19 ---------- Previous post was at 18:18 ----------

also think i can feel were i hit it it was on the corner of it and i went smack bang into it

---------- Post added at 18:24 ---------- Previous post was at 18:19 ----------

im tired i feel like i could fall asleep now and drop down dead im sooo scareddd

[loopylu86]

I have had that "feeling" so many times. Convinced that I wouldn't wake up. This is anxiety and that uneasy doom feeling. I get it alot. Having a bad night myself. But fear not! We will be here in the morning! Ouchy to banging your head!!

[Em.ma]

thanks hun
it really is tough at the moment!
i dont know what it feels like to live without ha now i cant remember
what a waste of life this is...
also i swear one pupil looks different size and under one eye feels funny to x

---------- Post added at 19:18 ---------- Previous post was at 19:00 ----------

what if one day i get cancer i couldnt bear it i really couldnt or get a life threating disease

---------- Post added at 21:47 ---------- Previous post was at 19:18 ----------

also for years and years have had a mole on back of head that ive never seen but can feel
its big ish and i dont think its changed but im panicking that it will one day turn to cancer im tempted to book a docs app
over it

---------- Post added at 22:08 ---------- Previous post was at 21:47 ----------

Also had a slight sore feeling On back of head touched it and it's a bit sore

[Greenman50]

Hi Emma

As great as this site is , i only started to feel better when i got up and about again and i had to FORCE myself to do so .
I remember i think it was Horse (Kevin) ? who said to eggy to open a window take a breath of fresh air and go for a walk .
I know how difficult it is when a thought gets "stuck" in your head but if you can rid your mind of this fear for 5 minutes today you can for 10 minutes tommorrow etc..
You will get there but i think you will have to force yourself to keep busy and keep your thoughts on nicer things before things improve .
Hope this helps Emma :hugs:

[sophieunderscore]

Hi Emma,

I too am terrified of death, its the not being able to accept the nothingness for me as well. A few years a go my grandad passed away - we knew he was dying and before he died I would lay in bed worrying how I would cope with his dying, would I go insane, how could I possibly live knowing he wasn't there anymore... anyway, when he very sadly passed away with lots of people around him in hospital (I wasn't there, but other family was) it was just a peaceful feeling. I was devastated but I was able to get on with my life with a period of grief and while I still miss him and light a candle for him whenever I visit a church, it didn't have the devastating ruining my life impact on my life I thought I would have. The point of this story is that a lot of anxiety is about worrying about the what ifs, we don't know how we'll cope if something terrible happens, and we assume we won't, but sometimes we just do. I hope this makes some sense :bighug1:

[Pansy]

Sorry about what you are going through. As you can see, you are not alone. Reading your post, it could almost be me. Like you, I wish I had a belief or something, I wish I could be like those people who don't let it worry them. We need to try and put these negative thoughts out of our heads because we are wasting time on them. Time we could be using for better things.............................easier said than done as I well know. I am the worst person to dwell on things, and even now when I can see what time I've wasted on worrying about things I can do nothing about, I still do it. :weep:

I do hope you can find a way round this.

[Em.ma]

Thanks guys. I have a week of work this week and honestly can't wait to go to back and be busy again ... I should of planned things to do in week off but I didn't lol... Today havnt got up much banging headache scared as I hit head yesterday .so now scared I have a blood clot from not moving .. Thanks for all your stories guys it really helps. I always think well I was dead for years and years before I was born and it was no big deal lol helps sometimes ... Still can't see my leading a normal life ever though

---------- Post added at 17:17 ---------- Previous post was at 17:13 ----------

Looking forward to next Monday a lot... Im realloy struggling today...

---------- Post added at 18:11 ---------- Previous post was at 17:17 ----------

Head feels funny we're hit yesterday metal clothes rack the edge bit hurt a lot :( scared of brain hemmorqge

---------- Post added at 18:13 ---------- Previous post was at 18:11 ----------

http://i49.tinypic.com/2599zd3.png
that bit
feels weird were hit

---------- Post added at 18:15 ---------- Previous post was at 18:13 ----------

hurts on that side to sometimes