Newbie - in middle of anxiety cycle

[smileforawhile]

Hello. I've been lurking for a while but have finally plucked up the courage to post. I have always been an anxious person but usually manage to keep this in check but for the past few weeks I've got myself into a terrible anxiety cycle. It started with a bout of sickness out of the blue which left my stomach fragile and my appetite disappeared. The loss of appetite caused me to be anxious as I know I need to be eating but the anxiety made me even less inclined to eat which in turn made me more anxious - nightmare! The same thing happened two years ago and the doctor prescribed me propranolol short term to snap me out of the cycle which worked that time. Last week I went to the doctor who gave me propranolol 40mg twice daily and I was beginning to feel the benefit but then felt totally spaced out after 4 days on it. Went back to doctor who told me my heart rate had dropped to 50. I have now stopped taking it but my anxiety is still present. When will my appetite come back? I'm stressing already about having to be in work tomorrow and not feeling great. I hate ringing in sick but there are days when I just have no energy and feel like crying I feel so anxious. I beat myself up thinking there are so many people with far greater issues to contend with than this but I feel so despondent and wonder when I'll ever feel like my old self again. I'm wondering about taking half a proranolol tablet to take the edge off things to see if that helps but worried about heart rate dropping again. I just wish I could press a reset button to get myself back on track. Any tips would be greatly appreciated. :unsure:

[Annie0904]

Hi :welcome: I am sorry that your bout of sickness has set off your anxiety again. When I get sick I always start to get more anxious and the worst thing for me is the nausea and not wanting to eat so I just try to eat little and often. Sometimes we have to admit defeat and let our bodies rest. I hate being off work sick too but sometimes I have to think how important my health is and quite often a few days rest will put me back on track but other times I get anxious about what they think of me at work for being sick so it makes me worse! I hope you will find lots of help and support on this site, at least we know we are not alone in these feelings. sending you :hugs::hugs:

[paranoidtree]

Hi and :welcome:

Illness and anxiety go hand in hand for me too so you are not alone in feeling this way. It could be worth chatting to your doctor tomorrow about taking less propranolol, maybe just 1 a day could help? Also, could be worth trying Bach's Rescue Remedy, that can help me calm down a little.

Good luck and hope you feel better :)

[smileforawhile]

Thanks for your comments. Have postponed taking propranolol so far this afternoon in spite of fluttering anxious feeling. Really worried that even a small dose might lower my heart rate too far. I'm dwelling on the fact I'll have to meet with my boss some time next week to discuss my recent absences. Not sure I'm ready to admit to him what an anxious wreck I am?! I don't feel that my job has been any more stressful of late so the anxiety isn't really workplace based, it it just making me absent from my workplace! :shrug: What to do?!

[Annie0904]

I had to meet with my boss last week for a sickness review. I am guessing you will have sent sick notes in so they should know your reasons for absence. I just had to explain what I am doing to get myself well (medication, counselling).

[grace37]

I've been off work now for two weeks panic attacks everymorning as soon as i woke seen so many docs and even been to A and E to get the right balance of meds just about starting to get back to myself. my work been very understanding this time but they are not normaly i was worried i was going to get sacked but if you've seen a doctor there is nothing they can do. i know how you feel this time last week i thought it was never going to end but it does we're all only human and our bodys just need time to recover xxxxx

[smileforawhile]

My sick lines give deatails of my physical symptoms but do not actually state that they are anxiety related as I have not chosen to divulge that yet. Maybe I should just bite the bullet and tell him the symptoms I'm experiencing are as a result of anxiety? I've always managed to hold it together during quite stressful times at work so it feels like a weakness to say that I'm currently grappling with anxiety which does not really have a specific cause other than my own reaction to being unwell. It's ridiculous..I worry about being off work and that worry makes me feel so anxious that I then am off work. Horrible cycle. It's really wearing me down. x

[Annie0904]

It is usually the strongest people who end up with anxiety and being anxious is not a sign of weakness it is a sign of being strong for too long! :) I just told my employers about my anxiety. I know what you mean about the cycle of being off work, I am the same. x

[missworry]

Hi and welcome, it`s such an awful thing to deal with anxiety but thats why most of us use this site & hopefully like me it will help you to realize your not alone and i find that helps.
Regarding work i must admit i have always battled through because i never wanted anyone to know but once you start talking to friends & colleagues you find alot of people have gone through similar struggles and as you know god anxiety is an awful struggle.
I at the moment am considering asking doctors for a small dose beta blocker like propranolol because i`m having awful eptopic heart beats, and i`m quite sure I`m making them alot worse by worrying and getting anxious.
Take care and hope you feel better soon you can control it believe me i have had it for many years & probably had every symptom under the sun but most of the time i manage to lead a normal happy life it just sometimes creeps up again.:bighug1:

[smileforawhile]

That's a helpful way of viewing anxiety - not as a weakness but as being strong for too long. That has made me feel a bit more positive. I'm still undecided about what to tell my boss. On more optimistic days I think that I have always overcome these 'blips' and so there is no need to divulge my anxiety issues but whilst in the middle of one at the moment I begin to wonder when I'll ever come out the other side and putting pressure on myself to hold everything together and get back to my usual routines begins to take its toll and make me feel worse. x

[Annie0904]

When I get the set backs I always think "I have overcome it before so I can do it again" but sometimes I have to give in to it for awhile to let my body have some rest away from everyday events as if I just keep battling it I get more tired and the anxiety gets worse and lasts longer. x