First panic attack in over a week :(

[loopylu86]

So last night I felt ok. I have been abit down these last few days due to approaching time of the month (it actually arrived this morning) but last night however..I was chatting on the phone for a good hour with this great guy that I am currently getting to know. We were just chatting about this and that and subjects covered were the usual including work and my current situatin with work. I started to become quite anxious throughout the phonecall and at one point we were discussing relationships etc and all of a sudden I just came over very strange..I knew it was a panic attack but it felt different to usual. I didn't get palps or become sweaty..It was more pure dread and disconnection,knot in the stomach,trembling,urge to pee and fear. I also had the adrenaline surge. I thought I was going to pass out and die. Everytime I have a panic attack they are the same but so different also...the feeling is so bizarre. I applied all the usual techniques. The thing is...I was ehausted after and tried to listen to a relaxation cd and did fall aslepp ok. I have woken this morning really anxious and very clammy with a headache and pure doomy and sad feeling. Just when you think you are at the bottom...It gets worse! I really feel back to square one. So my questions are....

Does this sound like a panic attack?
What does it sound like my trigger was?

[Annie0904]

It does sound like a panic attack and if you are anything like me the slightest little thing could have triggered it especially at a time when your hormones are all over the place anyway :( So sorry to hear after you have been doing so well but I always got more anxious the first few days of my period so maybe in a few days you will feel better again...think positive this is just a little 'blip' and in a few days you WILL feel better sending you lots of :hugs::hugs:

[paranoidtree]

oh hun, :hugs: sorry this happened to you, i think these things hit us harder when we are down.
It did sound like a panic attack, some of my best (haha!) ones are like what you described, a pure feeling of fear and dread, trembling and i normally just want to run away and hide. I'm not sure what your trigger was though but rest assured this was just a panic attack. And it's normal to feel exhausted after and to feel off this morning too.

Just try to rest today and do something nice for yourself :)

[loopylu86]

Thanks both. I have made an effort to get up and have some toast and I do feel ok on my feet which is good. I am going to try and do some cleaning today and do something productive. My main issue now is how I am going to meet this guy. I can't really invite him over incase I need him to leave and same for going to him..he has asked to see me Saturday and after cancelling previously..I know he is going to be annoyed if I do it again. Part of me is thinking to put this on the back burner because I really can't see a way around and it and ultimately it is leading me to more stress.

[MoniqueLeah]

Hello Lu, im so sorry to hear you're feeling so down.:hugs:
Maybe the pressure of starting this new relationship is partially the trigger. It seems you might be stressing yourself out trying to be 'perfect' and ready to see him but your body might be trying to tell you it wants self love first. If i was in you're position, even though it seems really hard, i would focusing on making myself the best most healthy version of me i could first! Stick in there love!

[Annie0904]

Since he knows that you have anxiety, could you wait until Saturday to decide where/when or if you are going on a date? That would take the pressure away from you now and you may be feeling much better on Saturday :hugs:

[loopylu86]

Hello Lu, im so sorry to hear you're feeling so down.:hugs:
Maybe the pressure of starting this new relationship is partially the trigger. It seems you might be stressing yourself out trying to be 'perfect' and ready to see him but your body might be trying to tell you it wants self love first. If i was in you're position, even though it seems really hard, i would focusing on making myself the best most healthy version of me i could first! Stick in there love!


This makes so much sense. I definitely have body confidence issues and am abit overweight at the moment and the thought of intimacy etc really makes me nervous. Before my panic and anxiety returned I went on several dates with a few losers and it sort of made me feel disappointed with how the majority of men appear to love playing mind games etc and it has made me push any genuine ones away. I always am quite hard on myself and never really feel good enough..although when I'm done up. I'm not bad at all. I have never failed to attract men but I was in a really destructive relationship up until Christmas last year. The man in question used to call me and fat and ugly on a daily basis..and words that are too degrading for me to even type. I think this definitely effected my self esteem. I really don't want to waste this opportunity but I don't think I am ready. Despite a relationship being something that I do really want. Thanks for this. It has really opened my eyes.

---------- Post added at 10:19 ---------- Previous post was at 10:16 ----------


Since he knows that you have anxiety, could you wait until Saturday to decide where/when or if you are going on a date? That would take the pressure away from you now and you may be feeling much better on Saturday :hugs:

Saturday could definitely be a good day and as you know..Everyday is the same but also very different when living with anxiety. I know I want to spend time with him. There is no question about that. He is amazing and really makes me smile but I am definitely really nervous about what he thinks. My normal attitude to dating is "if they don't like me,then their loss" but I think I really do care when it comes to this one!

[MoniqueLeah]

. The man in question used to call me and fat and ugly on a daily basis..and words that are too degrading for me to even type. I think this definitely effected my self esteem. I really don't want to waste this opportunity but I don't think I am ready. Despite a relationship being something that I do really want.!


I hear ya sister!!!! i have been in a very simmilar situation. i came to the conclusion that i would attracted better people if i felt like a better person. I was low, and i just wanted someone, ANYONE to love me, because i couldnt love myself. so every man, regardless of how disgusting (and that guy you describe takes the cake!) they are seems like its worth it to feel that acceptance and honey there is nothing like the feeling of being wanted. I know where your at, but ill let you in on a little private story, the guy i was seeing, was well like 'that' just a big smelly peice of manure and he just broke me. i never though i would find anyone. then i decided EFF THAT!!! im going to MAKE him see how amazing i really am. I lost weight, joined community groups made friends, was involved in life! i was so happy! (granted my mind was still a little messed up and i had panic attacks all the time, i just pushed on through it) and he found me on FB.... begging my forgiveness, wanting another go.... and being on that side made me see how pathetic he really was. So remember this no matter how much you feel down about this situation right now,there is NOTHING like the feeling of being better than the person that dragged you down! Before anyone can love you, you must love yourself. that way.... people will be drawn to you.:yesyes:

[Annie0904]

I was in a relationship were I was emotionally abused for 13 years and I know how this effects your confidence and self esteem. Now I have the perfect husband who really cares and understands me and I hope you can find a caring, loving relationship too when you are ready. My husband has helped me feel better about myself and were before it was always negative things about me My husband is always so positive. At first in our relationship when he told me I looked good, I would never believe him but now I can say Thank You when he compliments me because I can now believe it (most of the time!). It takes a while to get your self esteem back after you have been treat badly :hugs:

[MoniqueLeah]

:bighug1: BIG HUGS FOR EVERYONE IN THIS THREAD!! <3

[loopylu86]

I hear ya sister!!!! i have been in a very simmilar situation. i came to the conclusion that i would attracted better people if i felt like a better person. I was low, and i just wanted someone, ANYONE to love me, because i couldnt love myself. so every man, regardless of how disgusting (and that guy you describe takes the cake!) they are seems like its worth it to feel that acceptance and honey there is nothing like the feeling of being wanted. I know where your at, but ill let you in on a little private story, the guy i was seeing, was well like 'that' just a big smelly peice of manure and he just broke me. i never though i would find anyone. then i decided EFF THAT!!! im going to MAKE him see how amazing i really am. I lost weight, joined community groups made friends, was involved in life! i was so happy! (granted my mind was still a little messed up and i had panic attacks all the time, i just pushed on through it) and he found me on FB.... begging my forgiveness, wanting another go.... and being on that side made me see how pathetic he really was. So remember this no matter how much you feel down about this situation right now,there is NOTHING like the feeling of being better than the person that dragged you down! Before anyone can love you, you must love yourself. that way.... people will be drawn to you.:yesyes:

This is all very true! I always have problems in relationships and it definitely stems from my own weight insecurity. I am not huge but am definitely packing some extra pounds. I was slim until I was 23 then I had this crazy year after a 5 year relationship nded and I gained about three stone (42lb) I was eating out alot and having fun. I have since lost almost of it so have actually done really well! However...I still want to lose a further 2 stone. The weight I gained in that year made my boobs grow and I also gained it quite rapidly and have a few stretchmarks on my belly...which have now faded but they really bother me and likewise to my now deflated boobs. So things like this annoy me! I know we all have our things like this that annoy us! I really would like to become more active and think it's definitely something that will be happening in my near future!!

---------- Post added at 14:06 ---------- Previous post was at 14:03 ----------


I was in a relationship were I was emotionally abused for 13 years and I know how this effects your confidence and self esteem. Now I have the perfect husband who really cares and understands me and I hope you can find a caring, loving relationship too when you are ready. My husband has helped me feel better about myself and were before it was always negative things about me My husband is always so positive. At first in our relationship when he told me I looked good, I would never believe him but now I can say Thank You when he compliments me because I can now believe it (most of the time!). It takes a while to get your self esteem back after you have been treat badly :hugs:
It's so lovely that you have such an amazing and supportice hubby! It's one thing that I worry about..That I might come across an amazing man and end up alienating him or pushing him away through my own insecurities. I literally get an adrenaline rush and not the good butterfly kind...an actual feeling of dread at the thought of meeting this new guy. It isn't personal...He's great! I just wish it could go away to give me the chance to meet him!!

[MoniqueLeah]

It's one thing that I worry about..That I might come across an amazing man and end up alienating him or pushing him away through my own insecurities.!

You are NOT the person your anxiety wants you to belive you are. It is a faceless negative voice that tells you your going to never meet any one and even if you did, your insecuritues will push him away. Tell that voice CODSWALLOP! You HAVE an illness, you are NOT that illness. And when you meet that guy, he will fall in love with YOU not your illness. dont let that voice discourage you, use it and say" NO! ENOUGH! i wont accept your false truths, i know who i am and who i will be, and as soon as im better your voice will be nothing to me! damn anxiety!" :D You are better than what your mind is leading you to believe, and soon when you learn to deal with all this, you will be stronger as well. xo