new here ... lots of worries!

[lo89]

Hi there, just wanted to introduce myself as I have been lurking for a while now.
I'm a perfectly healthy (hopefully!) 23 year old, don't smoke or drink excessively yet I am CONVINCED that I have a variety of illnesses ... Usually cancer of some description.
Within the last 2 months I have had leukemia (stiff legs) lymphoma (swollen glands) melanoma (a mole which I have had all my life ... Although to be fair I have always had checkups for that) and soft tissue sarcoma (a lipoma). It has got so bad that it is interfering with everyday life, my boyfriend is fed up of me constantly getting him to "feel my lump" and then compare it to him, I can't focus on anything, including teaching (I am on my final placement of a teaching degree and cannot teach one lesson without prodding myself!) qnd to make it all worse I have now got a pain in my ribs on the right side ... Which is obviously a swollen spleen because I have some form of cancer which has spread to my lymphatic system ...
I cannot bear this any more =[

[panic12]

I can completely relate to you, I am constantly worried I have the worst, it's horrible, I can't stop checking my symptoms either, which by the way can make them worse constantly testing them. If you have worries it's best to see the doctor if you haven't already, if anything just for peace of mind. Everyone in my family have gotten fed up with me asking them to compare symptoms, chin up :)

[Stormsky]

Hi
As you prob know, mind and body are closely linked, if you are telling yourself you have these ailments, you will start feeling real bodily symptoms.... Anx in itself causes all sorts of tension, pains, disruptions in digestion Etc,
You said it to yourself, your CONVINCED , so this will cause turmoil, more Anx, more symptoms.

[lo89]

Thanks for the reply! I meant to say that the rib pain is on the left hand side, not the right. Its strange that I am worried about being ill to the point that it is making me ill which just makes me all the more worried! I have been asked if I would like to see a cbt by my doctor ... Tbh I think he is getting sick fed up of me! Had bloods done about 8 weeks ago which were satisfactory, had two GPs check out the lump on my back who both agreed lipoma, and I am awaiting an appointment with a derma about the mole (which has been marked as routine so I could wait up to 12 weeks =[) google is not helping!

[panic12]

I am the worlds worst googler you have to stop, I have sat down and googled symptoms and read so many horrible things to the point where I have my head on my desk crying as i'm convinced i'm dying only to be told by the doctor i'm fine, last night after posting a thread of my own I stopped googling symptoms and today I feel so much better :) Google is evil and always makes you jump to the worst conclusion

[lo89]

I totally agree! One thing that I find does help is if I get my boyfriend to google for me ... He types something rational into google, rather than my usual "symptoms of ..." or "huge lump ..." my anxiety has got much worse since I experienced a second miscarriage last month ... Dunno if it could be related?

[panic12]

I always make my symptoms seem worse too, I tend to type my symptoms into google like this for example 'muscle spasms brain tumor' well by typing that in im always going to find a link to the two somewhere. As for the miscarriage, yes I would say theres a link traumatic experiences seemed to trigger my dads anxiety too.

[lo89]

It is strange how we do that! Just out of curiosity, what symptoms do you have?

---------- Post added at 21:31 ---------- Previous post was at 21:28 ----------

Isn't it strange how we do that! Just out of curiosity, what are your current symptoms?

[panic12]

Well at the moment I have:

eye floaters and a little tiny spec in my vision (both of these really freak me out, even though there probably nothing)
lightheadness (only really when I notice it)
tiredness
aches and pains (shoulders, stomach, occasionally ribs)

now there the ones i'm experiencing at the moment but ive had so many come and go such as headaches, tight chested, shaking, muscle spasms, tingling hands the list goes on

[lo89]

And you think those are due to a brain tumour? I have several of the same symptoms as you!

Jaw pain and inability to open jaw wide (tmjd)
Random sore patches on scalp
Neck stiffness
Rib pain
Lump on back
Swollen glands in neck
Stiff legs
Leg pain

I interpret this as widespread cancer! I know it is totally irrational, but then I think ... No one expects to get cancer, why wouldn't I get cancer? What happens if it is cancer and I ignore it?

The reason I am asking about the brain tumour as my dad had a suspected brain tumour (MRI confirmed lesions on his brain) and he didn't have any of the symptoms you listed!

[panic12]

We have similar symptoms, but we also both have anxiety, over the months I think ive thought I have had every type of cancer there is, I find that most my symptoms go eventually, but then a new one will appear. The only reasons I think I have a brain tumor is because of google, it always makes me fear the worst. This time six months ago I was certain I had heart disease/cancer now all the symptoms of it have gone, and i'm stuck with my current ones :unsure:

[lo89]

pain in the bum isn't it! (I shouldn't have said that - I will have a sore bum next haha!) I am starting to think rib pain may be trapped gas, what an idiot! If you had a brain tumour you would likely have extreme dizzyness, sickness, slurring of speech and confusion.

[panic12]

haha :) don't keep checking if your ribs still hurt by the way because prodding and poking will definatly make them hurt, i'm a serial prodder and symptom checker myself, and I know my symptoms are more than likely my anxiety but you know how it is once you get an idea in your head, leave the ribs 48 hours and if the pain does not subside then go see your doctor for reassurance :)

[lo89]

Strangely I do not poke my ribs but I just googled "trapped wind" and it sounds like what I have got ... Bet if I googled cancer it would sound the same too! Laying off the diet coke tonight I think. I am not sp worried about the tons as I do get it from time to time and it usually clears up, feels like a rib muscle has popped or something.

[panic12]

I think that's what mine was too, trapped wind but when I first got it I kept prodding it to see if it hurt every 5 minutes, ive probably made mine hurt like that, as long as you DONT google cancer you will probably rest easier tonight, the problem might not even be there in the morning :)

[lo89]

Sounds like a good plan! I have lay on my back for a while and the pain has moved to the front of my chest, hence trapped air!

[panic12]

It does sound alot like trapped wind to me, more than likely when your minds at rest you probably won't even notice it :)

[lo89]

I have also just noticed that my "massive" swollen glands have gone down a bit =] might survive the week after all - just got the lumps and bumps to deal with =]

[panic12]

That's great to hear :) I don't think I have had a single symptom that does not clear up on it's own eventually, and i'm certain you will survive alot longer than just the week!