View Full Version : Panicking bad
I feel I can't breathe, burning, thinking horruble stuff, don't like my mind tonight, feel scared. Don't want my kids near me. Day 4 citalopram, I can't cope feeling manic like this
It is the cit Laura. Concentrate on your breathing and do anything at all to relax and distract. Can you poss get into bed and watch a dvd? I know it is AWFUL but you have to push past it! The anxiety is made worse the more attention you give it. xx
oh Laura so sorry you are having a bad night, try to stay positive...have you had your Epsom bath yet? loopylu got some today and said they are really good, still waiting for mine. sending you lots of hugs :hugs::hugs:
Oh yes Laura...They are amazing! These are just feelings and sensations and they WILL pass!! I PROMISE!!! Xx
Sobbing my heart out,just feel so anxious and I any stand the kids round me tonight I feel like an awful mum, how will I cope tomorrow. Hubby back at work and home alone with them. I can't stop crying. Sorry girls
You are not an awful mum! Remember what you said to me when I thought the same about me? Tomorrow is another day and you may feel more positive...you have nothing to say sorry for...hey we are 3 amigos...we help each other!! :hugs:
I tried to tell him how I was feeling and he has fell out with me, says he just doesn't know how to deal with me when I am like this, I don't know what to do, feel so alone and shit, just can't stop crying. X
---------- Post added at 21:27 ---------- Previous post was at 21:26 ----------
I feel like kind of frantic inside, have you felt that? It's terrifying x
aww Laura wish I was there to give you a hug, don't beat yourself up over it :hugs:
I hate myself. I am hiding in my bedroom sobbing away like a right oddball. My family downstairs and don't feel part of it.
[/COLOR]I feel like kind of frantic inside, have you felt that? It's terrifying x[/QUOTE]
I have and yes it is frightening but it WILL go, try to relax and don't fight it, just let it go...you can beat this, we all have times like this but it will get better. :hugs:
Don't apologise!! That is what we are here for! This is the anxiety and bares NO reflection on you as a mummy so don't think that for a second! I can't be around anyone at the height of it. You need to keep calm and try and divert those thoughts! Stop the guilts! Concentrate on the here and now and not tomorrow. That is a different day!! Can you have a cuppa or a nice glass of water? Water always helps when I am feeling edgy. This is all just your heightened anxiety tonight and it is just tonight...and most importantly...the awful side effects. I had some VERY disturbing thoughts in the first week. Just pure doom and dread. Like this feeling of pure unease. This all so normal Laura!! Can you maybe listen to a relaxation cd? Or take a big deep whiff of those salts! Smells divert for me aswell!!
My little girl was hugging me earlier on, she is only 7, and she was just, you know. Over doing it, suffocating me, that's what set me off, I couldn't stand it, I didn't want her near me. Oh god sobbing my socks off, I love them with everything I have, I never felt that way about them before, if this is what cit does I don't want it!! X
---------- Post added at 21:34 ---------- Previous post was at 21:32 ----------
And the wee souls have been so good. I just can't stop crying so do sorry girls, you are the only ones right now who get it! X
Don't keep saying sorry Laura, we have been there too we know just what it is like. My kids have all seen me in a state and they come through fine and all say I am the best mum ever and yours will too! We will always be here to help you through it, you can't get rid of us no matter how hard you try :) Try to relax, I know it is easier said than done, do you think the bath would relax you? :hugs:
The cit really does make it awful at first. Just plain disturbing is my description but you have to let it get this way for it to get better. I know that is crappy to hear but once you get through to the other side and the real benefits kick in then you will be able to do all the things you want again. Your lovely little babies will understand! They know how much you love them! Are you near to your time of month at all...because the day before and first day of mine this month are one of the worst anxiety wise I have ever experienced. We can all refer back to my previous posts to clarify this lol. You might have some hormones floating around mixing with the cit making you really bad tonight. xx
I totally agree with Lu & Annie, Laura: don't apologise for being so brave to battle through some of the most frightening things the human mind can experience! You are a brave, special lady and a GOOD MUM! If you weren't, you wouldn't be so worried about your anxiety possibly affecting your children -- your worries show how much you care. But try not to worry about that either - your children would love you unconditionally even if you dressed up as Mr Spock & stuck a banana up your nose, because you are their MUM, and a Mum is the most special person anyone can have! :hugs:
Also, your husband will come round. What you posted that he said sounds much like what my husband used to say when I got in a bad place. I realise now that he only said it because he felt so helpless - he wanted to be able to take everything that hurt me away, but he couldn't, so he felt awkward and.... well, helpless is the only word really!
Sorry I didn't reply last night, I was just in such a state, I cried all night, I was back to shaking, feeling drunk, dizzy, sick, anxious. My husband ended up in years, he doesn't know what to do and I don't know what to tell him, it's just a mess right now and I haven't got it in me to pull it all back together. Going to speak to a gp today and see if perhaps these meds are not for me, I seem to be especially sensitive to them, I was honestly what felt like manic last night, it's scared the hell out me. Thanks girls x
---------- Post added at 10:23 ---------- Previous post was at 08:11 ----------
Just spoke to a nurse and we have decided not to take cip today and will speak to the doc tomorrow. I just can't cope with these side effects, I am shaking this morning, sweating, crying, feel suffocated dp just can't tough cip out. Thanks for taking time to message me and reply girls, really appreciate it xxx
You need to do whatever feels best for you Laura!! We are here for your journey to recovery and you will find what is right for you!! Keep yourself busy and distracted and keep those thoughts positive! We are all here for you!Hope you can feel abit more relaxed today! xx
Like lu said, we will always be here for you and I am so sorry that you had such a bad night last night. I have never taken cit. so can't really relate to that. When I was prescribed my meds my GP was nearing retiring age so I got older type drugs but they have worked for me apart from my little 'blips. when something triggers the anxiety. I really hope you have a better day today :hugs::hugs::hugs:
Thank you so much guys, your support is invaluable to me. Starting off on sertraline today, wish me luck :) xxx
Good luck Laura!! Wondered where you had gotten to!! How did it go then? How are you feeling today? xx
I hope they start to work soon Laura. :)
I feel better today but only via I think the cit is coming out my system. Took my first sert at 5pm, feel ok at the min. My doc actually tried to tell me I wouldn't get side effects from cit after 4 days, it would take longer!!!!! Pardon my French but, bulkshit!!!!!! Anyway, trying to be positive about this new tablet, just hoping it doesn't have the same effect as cit did, that was a total nightmare! How have you been? Xx
I really hope they work for you Laura, fingers crossed! :)
I disagree with doccy too! The first week is awful!! Lets hope you can get on well with these new ones!! I am feeling crappy today due to having two new boils. It feels like the pain has spread to my hip so I am really worried about it. My hip and down the area of the leg where a hip scar would be...That is all sore. I don't understand how it can be bad down there.
Oh sounds sore Hun, have you any savlon? X
Citalapram was the drug I used to take for anxiety and derealisation. The first week is hell if it isn't dont think the drugs will work for you. This sounds silly but before it sorts out your anxiety it makes it worse it is horrible but please try and hang in there and get as much support around you as possible. I promise you, you will feel better in a few weeks it just takes time. Like I said the fact its making it worse at the moment is a good thing.
Good luck on the new tablets Laura! :)
Thanks rich, I only took it for 4 days and I just couldn't deal with it any longer. I was in such a state and I have kids, job, just too distressing side effects. Doc agreed sometimes people can react too strongly and we decided to give sertraline a go so took my first one today. Hoping this one is better suited, I can cope with increased anxiety nausea etc but the manic feelings I was having on citalopram were just horrific. X
---------- Post added at 22:04 ---------- Previous post was at 22:03 ----------
Thanks Elle k xx
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.