View Full Version : Don't know if I can cope with this..really bad night after counselling
I had my counselling yesterday and couldn't sleep last night even though I was really tired. I was crying through the night and now feel bad for keeping my husband awake as he has to travel away for work today. Feeling really anxious this morning, Everything from the past seems to be all in my thoughts flashing around, all mixed up in my head (sorry don't know how to explain it) it is just all there and I can't get rid of the thoughts. Does anyone else get this after counselling? Then last night my foot was really hurting and it is 15 weeks since I fractured it. One of my friends said "You might just have to accept that it won't get any better and you always have the pain" Well if I always have to have this pain and can't walk without being in agony then what is the point of being here because I will always have anxiety and I will always have pain and I can't stop crying.
Danny_dingle
02-10-12, 09:02
Hi Annie,
I seriously feel for you, it sounds from this post and previous that me and you are very similar people! I certainly suffer with sleeplessness and increased depression after my counselling, and I know this sounds weird but it is a good thing.
As my counsellor quite rightly explained to me, it isn't a cosy chat over a cup of tea: you are dealing with painful things that your mind has previously pushed to the back and not dealt with, so it is very normal to feel like this. Your head is trying to sort through all the mixed emotions it has been hiding from for so long. And I know EXACTLY hat you mean by everything being mixed up together in your brain - it's hard to know what to deal with first!
All I can assure you is that you are definitely getting to the crux of your issues if your brain is buzzing like this after counselling, and that means that you are going to sort of the things that have made you feel so bad in the first place. This is the painful part: the future is going to be anxiety free, and it won't be long until you'e there!
As for your foot, what happened with it? I am sure there is something that can be done to help it. :)
I hope you feel better soon and that you feel happier now working through your emotions: take it at your own pace and remember, all that is happening is that you have tried to be strong for too long: now is your time to focus on you, and to let out all that sadness and start afresh. :)
Very good luck with it all,
Take care,
Danny xxx
Thank you Danny. It is just like the trailer of a scary movie in my brain at the moment!
I fell off a ladder and fractured 2 metatarsals 3rd and 5th and dislocated little toe and damaged ligaments. I had the cast on for 11 weeks and just started to walk (limp) without crutches 2 weeks ago but it doesn't seem to be getting any better. My physio said it is because it is like a bowl of soggy spaghetti in my foot at the moment and we have to wait for the spaghetti to dry. I hope I can stop crying as I am waiting for a delivery this morning and don't want to answer the door in this state!
Danny_dingle
02-10-12, 09:12
Hi Annie,
With all due respect I would ignore what your friend said about it! ;) You're still recovering from a pretty nasty injury so it's bound to still hurt and your physio will know what's best, and if they're hopeful all is going well then it will be OK in time, I'm sure!
I would say s*d the delivery man - if you're crying, you're crying! It's good to get it out, and it might cheer you up to see the look on his face, lol! If you need an excuse, just say you've been watching Love Actually... ;)
I'm sure your foot will be better soon, and so will you. :)
Danny xxx
I'm sorry you had a rotten night Annie - :hugs: for you.
Danny's advice is good - ignore your friend (I'm sorry, but what an unhelpful thing to say) who isn't (presumably) a physiotherapist or musculo-skeletal specialist, don't worry about crying as it is all part of the healing process, and remember what Robin says in your CBT books: you are in no danger from either your anxiety, or the things in your past that are triggering it. They're horrid, I know, but they can't hurt you in the here and now.
Of course your foot is going to get better Annie!! These things take time! You really did a number on your foot there! 15 weeks is not a long time when it comes to healing bones!! You will not have to learn to live with the pain...(with all due respect...what a ridiculous thing to say)
The combination of the pain keeping you awake and the therapy is why you are feeling so bad...So sorry that you had an horrendous night. I think the fact that these events have been brought to the forefront of your mind is a good thing...You are reacting to them..no doubt like you always have and for good reason. But this therapy is going to make you address them and maybe feel moe at ease with it now. It's just a blip!! You ARE in recovery xx
Thank you Danny and Elle-Kay...yes you are right about my friend. Luckily I have a physio appointment this afternoon and I must say my physio is the best, he is so understanding and always manages to reassure me but he must be sick of me asking him questions all the time about was is going on inside my foot!
I wish I could just switch off all the thoughts in my head at the moment.
My cat Chai knows I am not good this morning...instead of running up stairs wanting to play he has just laid on the bed beside me :)
Danny_dingle
02-10-12, 09:26
Aw Annie I miss my cats! When I lived with my parents we had four and they were awesome! I still see them most weekends but now I live with my fella and he's allergic so I can't have one! Cats are great when you're sad, give Chai a cuddle from me! Xxx
loopylu...I wish we would listen to what we say to each other lol! and thank you for your kind words. I hope we both get reassurance for our health issues today from our appointments :)
I am not even going to try to use my new phone when it arrives today..I can't take any more stress!
---------- Post added at 09:28 ---------- Previous post was at 09:26 ----------
Aw Annie I miss my cats! When I lived with my parents we had four and they were awesome! I still see them most weekends but now I live with my fella and he's allergic so I can't have one! Cats are great when you're sad, give Chai a cuddle from me! Xxx
Chai is a Bengal/Siamese cross and he thinks he is a dog! He brings toys for me to throw for him to fetch and brings them back to me and he goes and gets his harness and lead when he wants to go for a walk!
Danny_dingle
02-10-12, 09:33
Wow I bet he is gorgeous! And so clever! Ours are just bog standard kitties. Beau, (who is MY cat, although dad says she's his ;) ) is a long haired tortoiseshell. I love tortoiseshell cats: they are always female (have been for the past 50 years according to the vet) and apparently are the most fiesty. They are usually the ones most likely to be hunters and put up most of a fight when in danger! Beau is awesome. She always comes to see me when I go home and stands on the chair to miaow at me! I'm seeing her tonight actually. xxx
I have attached some pics of Chai
I have attached some pics of him
Morning Annie. I think today you will be tired from the horrible night you had and this will make everything seem worse, also, I think when we are anxious it makes any pain we are in so much worse. After your physio take it easy today, your foot will get better, I promise you, it's going to take time but it's like a watch kettle, it will never boil unless you stop looking at it. I know you are frustrated, you can do this, chin up hunni xxx
Thank you Laura..hope you are feeling better today. I am starting to worry about work now. I said to my husband "what if I lose my job" He just says "don't worry we'll manage! he never worries about anything.
My hubby is the same, cool as a cucumber, never stresses about anything. Don't you wish you could be like him, I know I do. Annie the only thing that matters right now is you getting better. Forget about work, that's
---------- Post added at 10:11 ---------- Previous post was at 10:10 ----------
Only going to stress you out and make your anxiety climb xx
I know sometimes when I start to feel anxious I just keep feeding it with more and more all the time and it just makes me worse. I am even worrying about answering the door when my new phone is delivered! They said before 11.30 but if it is Yodel it will probs go to the wrong address anyway!
paranoidtree
02-10-12, 10:22
Annie, sorry to hear you had such a bad night and i agree with the above posts, you will get better and your foot is healing, it just takes time.
Your cat is gorgeous! They always know when you need some extra support, mine was following me everywhere yesterday. He is called Joey and we think he is a russian blue though we get him from a rescue home so can never be certain.
Annie, sorry to hear you had such a bad night and i agree with the above posts, you will get better and your foot is healing, it just takes time.
Your cat is gorgeous! They always know when you need some extra support, mine was following me everywhere yesterday. He is called Joey and we think he is a russian blue though we get him from a rescue home so can never be certain.
Thank you I am starting to feel a bit better thanks to everyone's support this morning. It is so awful when you don't get any sleep, it makes everything so much worse and all night I have just had visions of the events I spoke to my counsellor about.
Your cat sounds lovely, I like Russian blues.
Danny_dingle
03-10-12, 08:36
Morning guys,
Annie: Chai is stunning! You can tell he is a cheeky monkey just from the photos!
Having a bad morning myself today, woke up with my mind racing, woke up about seven times in the night. I had a massage yesterday and was told by the masseuse and my dad (who also has them) that I'd sleep like a log. No such luck. Just feel agitated and like I REALLY can't face work today, although I need to just sit back and look forward to the fact that I'm only going to be there for four hrs today.
Also my counsellor had to cancel again yesterday, and because of work I don't think I can see her next week. Feel like it's taking forever to get better. Considering calling a helpline because I need to talk to someone.
Danny x
Sorry you are having such a bad morning Danny. I am a holistic therapist and massage usually does help you to relax especially if it is an aromatherapy one. I have been awake most of the night too but I am still off work with my injured foot....not looking forward to going back after being off for so long...sending you :bighug1::bighug1:
panickygirl
05-10-12, 13:06
Hi Annie,
I really feel for you and can empathise on two counts here. I feel very emotional and drained after seeing my therapist. It would probably be weird if I didn't. I am discussing things that make me uncomfortable and sad, and more than that, I am discovering things that I didn't think were a big deal and discovering facts about myself and the way I deal with things that are perhaps not the nicest things to discover about yourself and can make me feel a bit like I'm a failure because I don't react to things as 'easily' as everyone else around me seems to. Does that make sense? So I just wanted to say that it's totally rational and reasonable to feel emotional and sleepless after therapy. It's hard to open yourself up and therapy is a bit of an artificial environment anyway so feeling a bit of turmoil afterwards is natural I think.
Have you tried any sort of breathing exercises or sprays/oils/natural remedy things to try and help you switch off after therapy. If you know it's going to be a hard night, you can always have a cup of camomile, read a calming nice book and try to unwind as best you can.
---------- Post added at 13:06 ---------- Previous post was at 13:03 ----------
Hi Annie,
I really feel for you and can empathise on two counts here. I feel very emotional and drained after seeing my therapist. It would probably be weird if I didn't. I am discussing things that make me uncomfortable and sad, and more than that, I am discovering things that I didn't think were a big deal and discovering facts about myself and the way I deal with things that are perhaps not the nicest things to discover about yourself and can make me feel a bit like I'm a failure because I don't react to things as 'easily' as everyone else around me seems to. Does that make sense? So I just wanted to say that it's totally rational and reasonable to feel emotional and sleepless after therapy. It's hard to open yourself up and therapy is a bit of an artificial environment anyway so feeling a bit of turmoil afterwards is natural I think.
Have you tried any sort of breathing exercises or sprays/oils/natural remedy things to try and help you switch off after therapy. If you know it's going to be a hard night, you can always have a cup of camomile, read a calming nice book and try to unwind as best you can before heading to bed? Maybe force yourself to get up particularly early that morning so you'll be more tired than normal? Just tell yourself, tonight may be a hard one, but I'll get through it.
Also, I fractured my ankle about three years ago and was walking with a stick more three months, and it was still hurting for about four/five months in total. It took FOREVER to heal and I found it very dismaying. Feet are peculiar things, we use them all the time so they take longer to heal than other parts of the body. Stay patient and try and rest and give yourself a break as much as possible. You WILL get better!
Anyway, sorry for rambling on but you struck a chord with me! Well done for continuing with your therapy despite struggling with the after-effects and keep going, you should be proud of yourself.
x
Thank you for your reply, Yes I drink chamomile tea and have Bach rescue sprays. I am coping better as the week goes on but I have my next session on Monday and know it is going to be a difficult one. I guess I just have to expect that things may get worse before they get better. There seems to be so much going on at the moment that is reminding me of things from the past and I know I need to take the positives from them but it is difficult to do it and just let go of the negatives.
---------- Post added at 13:10 ---------- Previous post was at 13:07 ----------
That does make me feel better about my foot...I just feel guilty being off work and now that the cast is off I don't know if they will believe me that it is still so bad.
panickygirl
05-10-12, 14:19
Yeah I used to get really paranoid that people didn't believe me when I couldn't work/go out/do things because of my foot. I almost felt guilty! So silly but it's a classic anxious thought pattern.
Hang in there, you're doing really well and things will get better xxx
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