Having to make a massive decision, feel like life is over

[musiclover]

I was due to go back to university this week and I really wanted to go but I'm too unwell with anxiety, which has been back for last 8 weeks! I will lose my financial support and probably my job as my employer will be annoyed I can't carry on, I was in such a lucky position to get this funding. If they do sack me then ill have no money to pay my rent, boyfriend is a self employed lorry driver who doesn't have much work and so may not be able to pay it. Ill have to claim ESA and I might not get it on contributions due to boyfriends job, that means I'd have to move back in with my mum. What a mess at the age of 30 :( Just spoke to CPN who thinks all this is making my anxiety worse and it probably is, but there's not a lot of choice when your life is falling down around your ears.

[PanchoGoz]

Decisions decisions! You poor thing! Do you have any medication you can take to get you through the first few days maybe?
I'm at uni too and having a bad day. It's so full on isn't it. Even if you do drop out though, remember every exit is another entry to somewhere else. If you really can't manage, you can't, and it's not the thing for you. But there might just be a spark of life in you somewhere...look hard. I think you can do it if you put every little bit of effort you have into stamping on this anxiety and getting through this.

What medication and counsilling are you on.

[musiclover]

I'm on 150mg sertraline, have been on sertraline for 15 years. I had counselling for a year but 8 weeks ago after a session I became unwell and have been stuck in an emotionally numb, lack of appetite and not sleeping state. I contacted my GP who just recommended upping meds and so I referred myself to local CMHT. I can't go to Uni and do a professional qualification the way I feel at the moment. I'm scared I'm never going to get my emotions back :(