lass
09-08-06, 12:12
I've had such a good few days since Saturday, and I'm really gutted that I'm now feeling so bad again. I thought that maybe I was getting to grips with things, getting things into perspective, but the slightess thing has sent me off into a major state of anxiety again.
I had my sigmoidoscopy (for ?IBS) on Friday and they found some inflammation and took some biopsies, which I have to wait 2-3 weeks for results. I was completely stressed out about this at the time, but had a think about it over Friday night and lots of chats with friends and family, and realised this was a good thing, that they are checking me out thoroughly and the inflammation is hopefully something minor but could explain my symptoms.
From Saturday til now I have felt "normal" for the first time this year. I said to my hubby that I feel I am alive again. It's hard to explain but I was actually enjoying myself, happy again, rather than just existing and going through the motions.
Anyway, I've had a bit of tummy pain this morning, nothing unusual tho, and I've been to the toilet a couple of times. The second time I went, I noticed blood on wiping. Only a tiny bit but it has completely freaked me out. I've spent all year analysing my poo for blood, and not seen anything, then just when I think I am getting to grips with things I see some and it's really worried me.
My rational mind is telling me that this could be part of the inflammation thing, or even to do with the biopsies. It was bright red so I know it is new, not old blood, so nothing that has occured high up in the bowel. But I'm just really scared again and I can't stop myself from worrying.
I think I'm more p****d off with myself that this has started the anxiety off again, as I was sooooo happy until now.
Please, send me some reassurance if you can.
I don't know whether to try and get to see GP tomorrow. I was going to go to her this week to discuss the sigmoidoscopy report, but I didn't bother booking an appointment as I wasn't too concerned about it. However I don't want to go along to her in a right old state as she will just try and get me to persist with the antidepressants and I don't want to, I want to learn to deal with my worries not just blank them out. Also haven't found any medication yet that makes me feel better, only worse, and I've not got past 10 days on them without giving up.
Can anyone help please????
I had my sigmoidoscopy (for ?IBS) on Friday and they found some inflammation and took some biopsies, which I have to wait 2-3 weeks for results. I was completely stressed out about this at the time, but had a think about it over Friday night and lots of chats with friends and family, and realised this was a good thing, that they are checking me out thoroughly and the inflammation is hopefully something minor but could explain my symptoms.
From Saturday til now I have felt "normal" for the first time this year. I said to my hubby that I feel I am alive again. It's hard to explain but I was actually enjoying myself, happy again, rather than just existing and going through the motions.
Anyway, I've had a bit of tummy pain this morning, nothing unusual tho, and I've been to the toilet a couple of times. The second time I went, I noticed blood on wiping. Only a tiny bit but it has completely freaked me out. I've spent all year analysing my poo for blood, and not seen anything, then just when I think I am getting to grips with things I see some and it's really worried me.
My rational mind is telling me that this could be part of the inflammation thing, or even to do with the biopsies. It was bright red so I know it is new, not old blood, so nothing that has occured high up in the bowel. But I'm just really scared again and I can't stop myself from worrying.
I think I'm more p****d off with myself that this has started the anxiety off again, as I was sooooo happy until now.
Please, send me some reassurance if you can.
I don't know whether to try and get to see GP tomorrow. I was going to go to her this week to discuss the sigmoidoscopy report, but I didn't bother booking an appointment as I wasn't too concerned about it. However I don't want to go along to her in a right old state as she will just try and get me to persist with the antidepressants and I don't want to, I want to learn to deal with my worries not just blank them out. Also haven't found any medication yet that makes me feel better, only worse, and I've not got past 10 days on them without giving up.
Can anyone help please????