You CAN and WILL get through this....

[Success]

When I was at my worst, I used to visit sites like this and scroll through trying to find a success story to give me a little bit of hope. Apart from people trying to sell a 'miracle cure' I could never find one. I promised myself that if I ever felt better I would come back to these sort of sites and share my story.....

I think I have always been a naturally anxious person, but all through my early years and teens it never took over my life....then on a number of occasions in my early twenties I would start to feel overwhelmed completely out of the blue, but as I knew nothing about anxiety it didnt register to me what it could be and I put it down to general feeling unwell.
It then all came to a head when I went abroad on holiday without my boyfriend with a group of girl friends for one of their weddings. On route to the wedding I came over feeling sick, once I got off the coach I was shaking incontrolably, felt like I couldnt breath, thought I was going to faint..etc, I managed despite feeling so awful (presuming, as it was so hot I had heat stroke) to stay to the first dance, finally I made my excuses and left, I continued to feel awful, stuck in a villa alll on my own in a foreign country and an overwhelming feeling of letting everyone down....what must they alll think of me? The rest of the week was a living hell, stuck in my own bubble, unable to step out of the villa, feeling such a failure and slowly dawning on me after googling my symptoms coming to grips with having 'a mental health disorder'....how could this happen to me?

I thought once I was home this would all go away....but guess what.....it didnt. I explained to my boyfriend, he was/is understanding but not one of lifes indepths talkers so I would only really let him know when it got really bad. I did continue to work and always have....it was very hard though, walking around in a daze feeling constantly dizzy, overwhelming thoughts of letting everyone down and having nothing to look forward to, being far too tired, then not being able to sleep, feel like you cant breath, am I going to faint, am I doing anything weird....youve all been there right? The list is endless! How I got through everyday no i do not know....I feel very proud of how strong I was/am. I visited my doctor quite often and say help me, but please dont make me take drugs, there wasnt much they could offer.

I then got to a point where I couldnt sleep at all anymore, my work was now being effected, I just wanted everything to go away, at that point I really didnt care how but it had to end. I went to the doctors.....AGAIN....and said please help me AGAIN, and he said to me, you have now been going through this for well over a year, I think you need to re-consider drugs, by this point I didnt care anymore, he prescribed me Amitriptyline. I started taking it as prescribed 10mg before bed, which after reading up that is a low dose. I can honestly say its the best thing I have ever done, it helps me sleep and not only has the dizzyness stopped I rarely feel anxious now, im hoping to stop taking them soon but as they make me feel so good I know I could always go back to them. I just wish I would of done it sooner! Without my own determination, my boyfriend (who is now my fiance :D) and a few v.good friends and family I wouldnt be where I am.

Sorry for the really long post but I wanted to at least give one person hope that you can be 'normal' again! Im not saying the drug that I prescribed is any miracle cure, my advice is to take any help and advice from your doctor, find a friend you can discuss openly with it makes all the difference!

I wish everyone the best of luck :D

[Annie0904]

Thank you for sharing you story, it is so good to hear success stories :)

[Laura123]

Thank you thank you thank you, what a great post and thanks for sharing it xx

[Success]

Im glad you enjoyed the read, I think its very important that those that do start to feel better come back, especially as I have been waiting for this day for so long. :)

[Edward_1980]

Thank you for sharing this. I am sure it will serve as a big help to a lot of people :)

[Success]

It does Laura...:D we just all need to remember we are not robots and just like getting the flu or breaking a leg....we will get ill but it can be overcome xx

[BobbyDog]

Thank you very much for sharing your story with us, what a lucky person you are to have such a good support network, to see you through the bad times and the good.

[uk23]

I have never believed mental disorders can be cured. They might go away for a while but they will always be there throughout your life.

[Laura123]

I actually agree with the above, but I think that if you learn to accept this part of who you are and learn not to be scared of it, then you can learn to live with it on a level that dies not negatively impact your life. X

[BobbyDog]

I actually agree with the above, but I think that if you learn to accept this part of who you are and learn not to be scared of it, then you can learn to live with it on a level that dies not negatively impact your life. X
I agree with you Laura, it's all about acceptance, accept the fear and symptoms and try to move forward slowly but positively.

[paranoidtree]

Thank you for your post, it's always good to hear about someone who has recovered.

I do agree with the above and i recently realised that i need to treat my anxiety a bit like if i had diabetes. I know with some diabetes you need to give yourself an insulin shot every day, i realised i need to give myself a positivity shot/boost every day too to ensure that i keep myself feeling good whilst still accepting my illness. This has helped me, there are elements of what i'm suffering i can move on from (past trauma) but am aware that having suffered this way i won't magically be ok and need to be aware of how i'm feeling each day and help myself by doing something every day that is good and helpful.

[Success]

I agree that maybe it might come back, but just like if you break your leg, you will recover but that doesn't mean you won't break it again, in the mean time though I spend every day being thankful and grateful that today is a day that I am worry free. X x

[panickygirl]

Thanks for this. When it continues to recur and stay with you, it's hard not to lose faith. Glad you're doing so well :-) x

[Munki]

Amazing story Success! Great to hear these stories. You rarely hear the happy stuff so it's great to know it works. Who cares if medication helps eh! I used to fear the same with mine but I now think, if it aint broke don't fix it. Keep doing what you're doing and double congratulations!!